Some parental advise wanted....

I spied my 16 yr old daughter smoking a cigarette without her knowing I seen her.

I know this may not be a big deal to some, but it bothered me to see her smoking.

How have any DU parents "handled" this sitiuation?

My kids knew better. Both are grown and on their own and do not smoke.

My oldest just turned 12. We've talked about all this stuff and I have said that cigarettes are very addictive, damaging, stinky, etc. and of course now she says she never will, but ultimately, just like everything else, there's only so much we can control in regards to what our children do. We've also gone into drugs and I've given a point by point of most of them, including alcohol and what the dangers are. I was also honest enough to give her the truth that people don't use them because they're stupid or bad (like the DARE people often say), but because they make you feel good, but there are risks involved that to varying degres can f*ck up your life. Plus, the younger you are, the greater the risk. Same with sex.

We ALL have to make choices in life. I did at that age and so did everyone else. Most of the time, I was a pretty good kid. I try to be very honest about things and I hope as the years go on, she'll be confortable enough with me to discuss them as her own decisions arise.

started smoking for a while in high school. I nagged the shit out of her until she quit.
Working in recovery room, I have all the gruesome stories about the radical neck dissection patients with holes in their necks and half their face gone. I just started talking about that a lot and how STUPID it would be to get addicted to cigs knowing that it could happen to you.

She eventually caved and quit.

If not, nag her until she quits. Don't worry about annoying her...it's better to have an annoyed smoke-free kid than to bury them with the knowledge that you were her "pal".

If so, QUIT WITH HER. Lead by example. Also, ask her why she smokes, and then ask her to compare the pro's and con's of smoking. In my experience, most teens who start smoking do so because it's "cool" and don't really put a lot of thought into it. Fix that, and make sure she understands what she's doing to her body.

If none of that works, call the cancer ward at the local hospital and ask to speak to a doctor. It's been my experience that most are more than happy to give smoking teens tours to show them what they're doing to themselves.

Don't punish, educate!