:rofl: from this month's Runner's World magazine. One of the funniest things I have ever read...and it is all true! :rofl:
read the whole thing for a great laugh
Runners' Stories
THE PACK RULES: DON'T BE EMBARRASSED
Essential advice from runners & readers.
http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,s6-243-297--13081-0,00.html2. Check Your Gear
Rachel Chalmers of Oakford, Illinois, found out the hard way that her tights had become threadbare. "On a run someone yelled at me,
'Hey, we can see your a**!'" Madhur Kotharay of Mumbai was underdressed for
freezing temperatures during the New Year's Eve Midnight Run in New York City's Central Park. "At the medical tent, I was diagnosed with 'frostbite of the penis' and made to sit in the official car with the heater on full blast," he says. During a run in Mississippi, August Russell discovered the perils of sweltering heat. "The humidity had made my shorts stick to my skin, and they had completely disappeared into my butt cheeks. I may as well have been running in a thong."
5. Don't Wet Yourself
Buoyed by the thought of beating her half-marathon goal, Wendy Uhlenhake of Anna, Ohio, didn't want to make a pit stop. "By the final stretch, I started to pee with the pace, hoping no one would notice."
7. Keep It Down
Mary Arnstein of Pittsburgh felt queasy after running a leg of the Penn Relays.
"Bill Cosby came over to congratulate me, and I returned his kindness by throwing up on him."9. Tread Carefully <----
This one is my favorite. Imagine this chain of events suddenly happening next to you :rofl:
"I was running on the treadmill when the
magazine I had on the front panel fell off," says Lauren Hoff of Thornton, Colorado.
"I slipped on it, hit my face on the front panel as I fell, and knocked over a trainer and her client as I flew off." Says Megan M. of Boston who also fell off the 'mill, "I was propelled straight into a mirror behind me, which promptly cracked." Stacie Rose of Greenville, Michigan, landed face first on the belt, breaking her nose. "Runners have arthroscopic surgery, but I got rhinoplasty!"
10. Pay Attention
When Justin Shelman of Kansas City, Missouri, began suffering in the Chicago Marathon (his first), he sought help in a Tylenol tent. "I spotted what I thought was liquid Tylenol and swallowed it," he says. "It was Vaseline."
Red-Faced Runners
17%: Were caught during a pit stop
23%: Ran into a stationary object
13%: Fell off a treadmill
13%: Showed off black toenails
34%: Had dried snot on clothes or face
Based on 2,014 respondents to runnersworld.com poll