CNN BREAKING: Former White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan IS Bond...JAMES Bond.

Dallas TX - Former White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan has followed up his tell-all Bush Administration book with a shocking and unexpected career move. He will replace current Bond franchise actor Daniel Craig in the next film, loosely based on the Ian Fleming short story "Risico."

When asked how a Texas-based former White House Press Secretary could manage the smooth, suave, and very British inflections of the Fleming master spy, McClellan quoted liberally from his favorite movie, "This Is Spinal Tap." When reminded that the character of Nigel Tufnel is a rock star, not a spy, McClellan replied in a thick Cockney accent "This one goes to 11" and "I like the little tins of tuna you have here in America...tuna fish."

In another casting coup, the primary "Bond Girl" for "Risico" will be conservative talk show host Laura Ingraham. Her character is consumed by a mammoth boa constrictor during the opening credits of the film, marking another first in the franchise. The opening theme music will be "Touch Myself" by the 1980s one-hit winders, Divinyls ("When I think about you I touch myself"), played over a slow-motion, split screen montage of McClellan and Ingraham touching themselves (until she is consumed by the mammoth boa constrictor).

Filming begins in February 2010 with an expected Summer 2010 release date.

MORE: cnn.com/McClellan/Bond