So, ... I was caught in this friggin' telephone menu tree.

I was trying to upgrade service for my satellite radio so I could listen online. The telephone number put me in this damned automatic service "for my convenience." Round and round and round we went. The computer voice said she couldn't understand my zip code. She couldn't understand my telephone number.

"What service do you want to add?" Online isn't one of the options. We keep wandering through the various levels of the menu, getting absolutely nowhere.

"Do you want to speak in Spanish." No, it would only be worse in Spanish.
"I'm sorry, but I didn't get that." Geebus. One more lap around the menus. I'm now getting desperate to talk to a human being. I press zero, but that just pisses her off.

"What is your zip code." I say it. "I'm sorry. I didn't get that." I use the key pad to punch it in. "I'm sorry. I didn't get that. What service would you like to add?"

Now, I'm blowing a fuse: "I don't f*cking want to talk to the goddam menu or you anymore! I want to talk to a person, okay!" I'm ready to throw my telephone in the toilet when I hear, "Did I hear you say, 'Representative'?" Holy shit. "Yes! yes! yes."

By this time, I didn't even mind when Angelique attempted to sell me more services, more radios, and a different payment plan. And I'm listening online.

Damn.

let me push a damn button, cause the voice recognition is unreliable at best

or your phone would be in the toilet by now :P

http://www.payphone-directory.org/sounds.html

I had forgotten to pick up a copy of my bill at the hotel, so I thought I'd call the hotel from the airport and have them FAX it to my work. I had some Taiwanese coins, so I plunked in the proper amount and dialed the number. I got some message in Mandarin (which I don't speak). I figured they wanted more money, so I dropped in more coins. More Mandarin. So, I pressed 0. (Why not?) A different message.

Meh. Whatever. Some plans work better than others.

that is how those damn things feel to me