I'm thinking of starting a new public service.

There are already programs to drive drunks home from bars, to prevent DUIs. In that same vein, I'm thinking of opening a service to protect against PUIs and PWIs. After recent observations of other forums, it has become apparent that the incidences of PUI and PWI have become endemic on DU.

PUI (Posting Under the Influence) often leads to incomprehensible posts, aggressive behavior, loss of communication skills, hurt feelings, and even complete loss of social standing among more sober patrons of the forums.

No less, and often more, serious is the problem of PWI--Posting While Ignorant. This problem occurs when a poster has read a headline or even a thread title, but for reasons ranging from illiteracy, impatience, intellectual inadequacy, or the feeling that if they don't hurry up and post their insult someone else will beat them to it, the poster does not bother to read the rest of the story. This leads to many of the same issues as PUI, with the further side effects of premature interjection and post-stupidassfuckery syndrome, often resulting in Post Priapism, or a verbal hard-on that lasts longer than four hours.

I am asking for volunteers. Help end PUI before it claims another virtual life. If a poster has had too much to drink, you will act as an intermediary, translating his or her incoherent rant into something resembling a coherent thought, with punctuation.

The issues involving PWI are more complex, more long-lasting, and often have no simple treatment, but we are here for them, too. As with the PUI victim, we may be able to translate, or even dissuade, PWI posts before they happen. In some cases posters have been helped to overcome PWI through intensive coaching and exposure to the principles of logic and literacy. Not all of our endeavors have ended in failure. Still, it must be remembered that with PUI, time cures. With PWI, there often is no cure.

If you would like to be a part of this new service, email me at stopgoofyshit@savetheblogs.org. Please submit examples of your posts so that we may test for PWI in your own work. Thank you, and good night.

have you ever tried to get the PUI poster to step back and take a break? I'd rather struggle for a set of car keys than the keyboard.

:scared:

:)

:rofl:

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

:thumbsup: :patriot:

OMG, that is brilliant.

:D

:thumbsup:

I'm afraid that I'm PWSD.

I am an idiot, I know! :7

I just made that one up,it means Posting While Sleep Deprived.But since I first wrote that I
managed to take a 4 hours nap.I'm feeling much better. :)

Those posts resemble a Cheney rewrite of the Dr. Bronner's label.

:scared:

PWJ

Posting while jobycom.


:hide:

:loveya:

Yick!

...their posts should automatically be transferred to www.freerepublic.com

It'd be like beaming Tribbles over to the Klingon ship.

:P

:applause:

someday

They don't lack players, they just lack a strategy that an average high school defensive lineman coach couldn't figure out.

maybe you know it already
http://www.bloggingtheboys.com/

Well, that works for some.

I, on the other hand, have read some pretty whack stuff I posted. I didn't read it until the morning after when I woke up with peanut butter in my beard.

It works if you work it.

:+

If it's really funny, we'll leave it anyway.