Toothy raccoon bit off manhood - Democratic Underground

ccharles000

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Mon Aug-03-09 04:17 PM
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Toothy raccoon bit off manhood

Alexander Kirilov, 44, was on a drunken weekend with pals when he leapt on the terrified – but toothy – fur ball.

"When I saw the raccoon I thought I'd have some fun," he told stunned casualty surgeons in Moscow.

Now Russian plastic surgeons are trying to restore his mangled manhood.

"He's been told they can get things working again but they can't sew back on what the raccoon bit off," said a pal.

"That's gone forever so there isn't going to be much for them to work with."

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2172612.ece

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Sanity Claws

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Mon Aug-03-09 05:13 PM
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1. He was trying to rape the raccoon

That's what the article said. Unbelievable. Too bad the raccoon didn't bite off the entire thing.

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madinmaryland

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Mon Aug-03-09 05:26 PM
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2. Hopefully the raccoon bit off enough so that the idiot can't reproduce!

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KamaAina

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Mon Aug-03-09 08:49 PM
Response to Reply #2

10. That would qualify him for a Darwin Award

you don't actually have to die. Removing yourself from the gene pool in a manner such as this will suffice.

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Deja Q

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Mon Aug-03-09 05:42 PM
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3. So, what next, the raccoon goes around town saying "Kirilov Was Here"?

:hide:

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Parche

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Mon Aug-03-09 07:30 PM
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4. That Racoon is a real Prick

:rofl: :woohoo: :hug: :hug: :loveya:

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Deja Q

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Mon Aug-03-09 07:32 PM
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5. Ah, but at least the racoon wasn't a pack rat!

(he just spit it up and chewed it out. Like Lorena did...)

:spray:

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CreekDog

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Mon Aug-03-09 07:57 PM
Response to Reply #4

7. That raccoon has a real prick

:think:

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Deja Q

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Mon Aug-03-09 08:00 PM
Response to Reply #7

8. Once rigor mortis kicks in will we know for sure...

:rofl:

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rug

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Mon Aug-03-09 07:51 PM
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6. Everyone knew her as Nancy.

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Critters2

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Mon Aug-03-09 08:22 PM
Response to Reply #6

9. LOL! nt

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edbermac

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Mon Aug-03-09 09:04 PM
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11. Too bad it wasn't a toothy beaver.

Now THAT'S a headline! :7

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RedCloud

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Mon Aug-03-09 10:27 PM
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12. Maybe those 4 irate ladies from Wisconsin can glue it back on.

They seem to know how to do those things to men.

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