How many cigarettes, per child, do you pass out on Halloween?

wouldn't put me in jail.

Redstone

I actually did that to my neighbor's kids once. Their parents were at the end of my driveway, drinking a beer...

And I know you're joking, my dear LeftyFingerPop!

:P

a one-gallon tub and a scooper- the kids love it.

parents- not so much.

;-)

You know, you can still GET em in some old fashion candy stores like one of our great old stores, strip district, Pittsburgh.

Bad, yes, but nostalgic candy is fun to remember!

:hi:

:hi:

Perfect for flicking the ear of the kid sitting in front of you at the Saturday afternoon matinee. After the usher broke up the fight, share.

Does that count?

You're strict!

But I light little cute pumpkin and witch candles with very large flames all over my porch and put the candy bowl in the middle.

j/k... I love the little kiddies.

But, they are greedy little bastards. Two years in a row I sat a full candy bowl on the porch while me and the dogs were in the back bedroom because they bark their asses off when the doorbell rings. Never failed, someone would come and take the whole damn bowl. Last year, I left the lights turned off and that's what I'm doing this year too.

Fill the bowl up with raw liver.

That'll learn 'em.


:loveya:

Or I could make that kitty litter cake but have the real thing. Sign reading "help yourself to the delicious kitty litter cake!"





Kitty Litter Cake

CAKE INGREDIENTS

1 box spice or German chocolate cake mix

1 box of white cake mix
1 package white sandwich cookies
1 large package vanilla instant pudding mix
A few drops green food coloring
12 small Tootsie Rolls or equivalent

SERVING "DISHES AND UTENSILS"

1 NEW cat-litter box
1 NEW cat-litter box liner
1 NEW pooper scooper

Prepare and bake cake mixes, according to directions, in any size pan. Prepare pudding and chill. Crumble cookies in small batches in blender or food processor. Add a few drops of green food coloring to 1 cup of cookie crumbs. Mix with a fork or shake in a jar. Set aside.

When cakes are at room temperature, crumble them into a large bowl. Toss with half of the remaining cookie crumbs and enough pudding to make the mixture moist but not soggy. Place liner in litter box and pour in mixture.

Unwrap 3 Tootsie Rolls and heat in a microwave until soft and pliable. Shape the blunt ends into slightly curved points. Repeat with three more rolls. Bury the rolls decoratively in the cake mixture. Sprinkle remaining white cookie crumbs over the mixture, then scatter green crumbs lightly over top.

Heat 5 more Tootsie Rolls until almost melted. Scrape them on top of the cake and sprinkle with crumbs from the litter box. Heat the remaining Tootsie Roll until pliable and hang it over the edge of the box.

Place box on a sheet of newspaper and serve with scooper. Enjoy!



:)

:loveya:

:rofl:


Looks like a fun recipe.

but the price is just too high theses days....
and I have switched to American Spirits, witch are even more expensive.

And aren't as likely to have you featured by the local news.

http://www.oldtimecandy.com/candy-cigarettes.htm

kids love them.

Otherwise sod off ye tiny beggars.

:rofl:

They each get a pie in the face.

Calms those brats' asses right down

Swisher Sweets.


mark

Until we run out, that is.

:spray: :rofl: :spank:

I think pot is cheaper these days.

But the whiskey I buy to give out is super-cheap.

of cigarettes the airlines used to give out with meals. I have tens of thousands of these, all stored in humidity-controlled chambers. I give each child one of these packs, knowing that they will smoke them and become addicted for life. They also get a little package of real stainless steel silverware, also from the airlines. I got all of this for a song.

The tobacco companies pay me $1 for each pack I distribute to children under the age of 16.

You see, there are some benefits of the poor quality of airline travel these days.

They are up to 5€ a pack. I'll just blow the smoke in their faces and call it good.

More fun for the kids.