Places to do it

From the coolest place on the planet, and therefor the web: The Fantasuite Hotel, apparently in Minnesota. Each room is a different room in which to get your groove on with either your life partner or your weekend-when-the-spouse-is-away-on-business partner. Each room has a different theme, each of which will make you giggle with irony.

You can do it in the Caesar's Court room: You are Cleopatra. You've had a hard day rolling out of the rug. Now it's time to relax and get funky with your little Julie. He lounges in the tub with his 70s porn mustache. You do it. Later his slave comes into the room with a goat and they all join in on the fun.





You can do it in the Caribbean suite: the spanning ocean view is a calming blue presence calling to you from the balcony. It looks close enough to touch. It is, because it's actually painted on the wall 9 inches from the bed. You sip a mai tai. Then you do it.



Still, check out the 3-d panorama view of the room at the actual website.



You can do it in the Casino Royale room: Get away from it all for one night and pretend that you're in a hotel. Where you do it.





Or get jiggy prehistorical-style in Le Cave. Le Cave has le whirlpool right next to le bed. Try not to drip too much on the le shag carpeting. Amazing how using a French article makes everything somehow sexier.



Hey, bay-bee, do you mind if we split le bill?




Next week try doing it in the Cindarella Suite. See if her "foot" perfectly fits your "glass slipper". Wait, non of that sounds dirty.



Okay, try this: see if she turns into a pumpkin in the morning.



Pretend you're a pioneering family crossing the Oregon Trail. Extra authentic if you don't eat or bathe the day before and then bring some hard tack and buffalo jerky along for the romance. Pretend you've rescued her from bandits before slipping her the old Conestoga. Or for you more enlightened types, try being a pair of oppressed Lakotah for the night in the fabulous Tipi Grotto with authentic queen sized mattress.





But the best venue of all: Give your man the Moonshot he'll never forget. The room comes with a 'moon crater" tiled whirlpool, VCR, Nintendo, and... get this... an AM/FM stereo. That's right. Pretend you're doing it the future with not just AM, but also FM stereo reception... just like the astronauts had! Then unwind from your gravity free bouts of lovemaking with a revigorating game of Frogger on your state of the art 32-bit color Nintendo. Very romantic.



 

I stayed in a room, once, at the Peppermill Inn in Reno, NV with a tub. It was nice.

But we wouldn't want this to be a TMI thread.




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