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So you sacrificed all to put your kid (s) through college...

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alfredo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Apr-28-10 01:36 PM
Original message
So you sacrificed all to put your kid (s) through college...
http://textsfromlastnight.com/

Not suitable for work.

Some of these will bring back memories of you college years. That's assuming you remember those years.
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blue neen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-29-10 08:17 AM
Response to Original message
1. Here's a winner:
"They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it."
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alfredo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-29-10 11:14 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. Why put beer in a fish tank? It will get flat. Must be an English major.
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Orrex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-29-10 07:58 PM
Response to Reply #2
6. Maybe the beer was still in cans?
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alfredo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-29-10 11:40 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. Was he going out to get "tanked"?
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old mark Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-29-10 04:24 PM
Response to Original message
3. I just added that site to my favorites.
Edited on Thu Apr-29-10 04:24 PM by old mark
I am not sure just why, but I feel like I know many of those people, some of them from when I lived in Berkeley...

m
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alfredo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-29-10 05:37 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. It's amazing we survived college.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-29-10 05:56 PM
Response to Original message
5. LOL! " when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers,
had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre"
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alfredo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-30-10 11:06 AM
Response to Reply #5
10. I think we can all find something there we can relate to.
If not, you haven't lived.
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blue neen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-29-10 09:39 PM
Response to Original message
7. Sick, I tell you. Sick.
"i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush."
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alfredo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-29-10 11:53 PM
Response to Reply #7
9. Love that one! These are good.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
-------
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.

------------
(303):

You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.

(1-303):

ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.

-----------
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
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Commie Pinko Dirtbag Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-30-10 11:26 AM
Response to Original message
11. "woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol."
:rofl:
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alfredo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-30-10 12:30 PM
Response to Reply #11
14. I wish I had a dollar for every time that happened to me.
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av8rdave Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-30-10 11:38 AM
Response to Original message
12. Best one IMO
He nicknamed his dick "Too Big to Fail"

:rofl:
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alfredo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Apr-30-10 12:29 PM
Response to Reply #12
13. A universal truth: gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
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