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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Nov-07-10 11:33 PM
Original message
Shit my girlfriend says. Add yours.
Hong: You didn't tell me I look beautiful

Me: I tell you that all the time

Hong: Yes, but you should do it when more people are around.

-----------------------------

Me: Were you watching me while I sleep?

Hong: Yes

Me: That's creepy, you shouldn't watch people while they sleep

Hong: I do it on the subway, there's nothing else to watch

Me: They have TVs there! Watch them!

Hong: Yes, but the TVs know you're watching them, it's not as much fun.
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Kaleva Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Nov-08-10 12:10 AM
Response to Original message
1. self delete
Edited on Mon Nov-08-10 12:21 AM by Kaleva
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Nov-08-10 01:33 AM
Response to Reply #1
3. WHAT did you say, Kaleva?
GIVE IT UP!!!
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Kaleva Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 12:03 AM
Response to Reply #3
6. My wife would kill me if she had read what I wrote.
We both still laugh about it to this day but it wasn't one of her brighter moments.
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 07:27 PM
Response to Reply #6
24. I have great respect for your wife!
yes INDEED! :D
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Nov-08-10 01:33 AM
Response to Original message
2. I find her exceedingly logical
scheduling HEyHEy's clueless ass for ass kicking
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Nov-08-10 01:51 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. She had a bunch of weird ones this weekend.
Though usually she spends most of her time threatening to cut of my dick if it touches anyone but her. She's like a Female, Chinese Joe Pesci.
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Nov-08-10 01:55 AM
Response to Reply #4
5. she sounds awesome to me
yes INDEED
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MiddleFingerMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 01:44 AM
Response to Reply #4
9. The gift that keeps on giving...
.
.
.
.
.
...I can't stop laughing about "She's like a Female, Chinese Joe Pesci".
.
.
.
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NewJeffCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 12:11 PM
Response to Reply #9
15. What do you mean I'm funny?
"I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?"
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Bucky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 05:19 PM
Response to Reply #4
19. I want to clarify that, with the following rofl smily, I'm not laughing *at* you...
:rofl: but sadly, I cannot clarify any such thing, no matter how badly I want to. You fret constantly about getting a GF... and now that you do have one, it turns out she's borderline psycho and your capacity to produce future Heylings is at serious risk! Ha?

Oh, wait... that's not funny at all. I've quit laughing. It may be time to start keeping a packed bag at hand ready for a quick getaway. And maybe take some self defense classes while you're over there. I'd hate to lose a long time Lounger.
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JVS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 12:10 AM
Response to Original message
7. She thinks the TV is sentient?
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 01:36 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. It's China, everyone's watching you.
TVs included
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old mark Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 03:26 AM
Response to Original message
10. This is a GF from long, long ago...
Me : You're always nagging me...

Her: I'm not nagging, I'm just telling you what to do...


Former GF...from long, long ago.

mark
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Rambis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 05:11 PM
Response to Reply #10
17. "you have a black belt in Nagfoo"
My brother in law to his girlfriend and his mother-
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denbot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 03:33 AM
Response to Original message
11. "I don't nag, you just need direction, all men need direction, that's why we marry you".
She is a true believer.
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jobycom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 04:05 AM
Response to Original message
12. Stop posting about me to those losers on DU or I'll break your typing fingers.
That's what she would say if I had a girlfriend, anyway.
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MiddleFingerMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 04:19 AM
Response to Original message
13. Not being a TV watcher, but seeing references to the show -- until this thread I kept thinking...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
...it was "Shit", my dad says.
.
.
.
.
.
And I couldn't figure out what the hell that meant. :rofl::rofl::rofl:
.
.
.
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WillParkinson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 04:59 AM
Response to Original message
14. I wish I could, but...
Edited on Tue Nov-09-10 04:59 AM by WillParkinson
I don't know your girlfriend. :P
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Dr. Strange Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 04:52 PM
Response to Original message
16. Oh Dr. Strange, you do it so much faster than flvegan.
Ha! Take that idiot6!





Wait a minute...
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 06:35 PM
Response to Reply #16
22. She called you "Rabbit" for a reason.
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marzipanni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 05:17 PM
Response to Original message
18. Are you interested in becoming a Laction Counsultant?
http://www.phoenix-human-services.com/forms/form.jsp?ADEL=%2FmwUiWBVwrcKMMOWRgy9v52mnFgoOfV7UhRKpv9rrTlo4lliDVqIDeWSf5KLirQB43TvQGGN%2BWuFp%2BjHSbKJ4N1nPPciqFSYaPvg7ufXUgVkSbKXgxSl3wwtacgtIfvt3r3Bm4IOf8yQZb4IG3eGOhchG7SKpdCe&KW=&GB=5166247142&SID=adsense&PI=about.com&gclid=CJmhnY_glKUCFRhzgwodzhG-eg


Oh, sorry. Your girlfriend would not want you to be where Laction is. ;)
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Iggo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 05:26 PM
Response to Original message
20. Aw, man.
Mine's way too dirty for this board.
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Throd Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 05:57 PM
Response to Original message
21. "I named him Sphincter, like that giant statue in Egypt".
She was introducing me to her cat.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 06:36 PM
Response to Original message
23. "No, you CAN'T have sex with my sister."
So annoying, that.
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kimi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 07:34 PM
Response to Reply #23
25. Ok, that made me spit out my wine.
:rofl:
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Xipe Totec Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 07:42 PM
Response to Original message
26. She sounds pretty sane to me
I don't have a GF, but here's my wife.

"That's Not Normal!"
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7302230
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sakabatou Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-09-10 07:50 PM
Response to Original message
27. "How come you only have one TV?"
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