Are you depressed? Down in the dumps? Feel blue?

Yes or now?

Currently moderately suicidal.

Tucker

Have there been severe ups and downs?

I don't know you, but I hate to see people go through this (some family history). Wish you the best. Take care of yourself. :hi:

I have severe "downs" where I can just barely function and become very suicidal (n other words, every third thought or so is, "I should kill myself now because things will just get worse.").

I haven't been able to afford my antidepressants in a month now.

Tucker

It is an abomination that health care is not universal in this country. One of the reasons my wife and I are thinking of fleeing the country for greener pastures.

It's been so bad for so long that I doubt anything will help.

Tucker

They don't for me.

it sucks, but im used to it...

-LK

Not to brag, but right now I have it pretty good.
Got a good job that pays me enough
Usually have enough money to get by
Have a girlfriend that loves me, even though we're in a long-distance relationship.
I have had it far worse for a good portion of my life, so I want to appreciate it while I have it good. I've been depressed for a long time before this. It's not fun.

I think it's because, after 5 days of doing nothing because of a terrible cold, I was bored out of my skull so I went to the cantina last night and drank wine and danced until 3 AM.

I expect I'll feel more "chipper" tomorrow.

I started smoking again, drink wine most every evening, and am pretty anorexic. I am scaring myself. If it wasn't for my two dogs, who need me, I would have little reason to get out of bed. My kitty died in February, which certainly didn't help. I still miss her so much. What do you do to cope?:shrug:

Force yourself to eat soup or at least a little something if this is getting to be a problem.

Is there anything you can do to change the situation that is causing this bout of major depression for you? Anything you can do to confront it or address it?

You asked how to cope with it, but I wonder if there is anything you can do to change it as well?? Or instead? :shrug:

Just asking. Food for thought, not asking you to reply, just to think about it ....

Yes, I know exactly what I need to do, get out of my living environment. It is abusive and oppressive. I own a house with someone, but need to get back there. That has to be my first priority, but there is so much to do to accomplish this. I just need to stop blowing it off. Thanks for caring.:-)

after my beloved 15 year old kitty Peewee died last year. I've always had trouble with depression, but losing Wee nearly put me over the edge. My two new kittens, Puck and Oberon, have really lightened things up around here. My other elderly cat was pulled out of his depression by them as well-he actually plays every day now! Like you, I find it's often hard to get out of bed in the morning, but with two young ones pouncing on my head, I don't have much of a choice!

Wellbutrin is also helpful for me, though it doesn't work for everyone.(Just takes the edge off, which is sometimes enough to get through the day).

Or two, as in your case, LOL! Losing my beloved Rhiannon, in the fall of 2001, sent me to a very dark place. Rescuing the cat who I just lost helped. Someday, I plan to have a kitten. Two would be better, since they can be companions and grow up together. That's the reason I adopted my Sara, since my tiny dog has never been an only dog and just wasn't happy as one.

I have meds and should get back on them. But first I just need to change my living situation, for my animals and for myself. Thanks for the advice. Just picturing the kittens made me smile.:-)

I'm now on some new incrimental antidepressant to counter the effects of reactive clinical depression, and on Lorazepam to help me sleep. I forget what the antidepressant is called, but it's a short-term prescription (3-6 months), and it's usually administered to people suffering severe grief or shock. Basically it makes each day manageable, but the dose per capsule is gradually reduced, so by the end of the six months, it's pretty much just a placebo, and there's no chemical dependence left.

Basically, this depression stems from my wife leaving without notice in January. I was unable to function, and was even suicidal for a while, but it seems to have become more managable due to a combination of the drugs, some good therapy, some time away, and talking with good friends in person and here on good ol' DU.

I caught my g/f with another guy last week, I'd say that's a yes vote.

I'm sorry to hear that. That sounds rough.

I think it goes up and down with the polls. I was feeling a bit down last night when I found out Kerry was down in WI by 6, but then today we get some good numbers out of MN, so I'm a bit more up.

:P but seriously though, I've gotta chill with these polls -- I keep telling myself, they're not too important at the moment, it's still too erly, but arghh! I can't help it.

:beer: I think I need a drink!

Some days I'm OK, others I just get flat-out homesick and lonely living here. Depends on what happens at work too. I got placed in a really bad school to start off, where the other teachers were all very unfriendly towards me. My new school seems a lot better so far. DU has actually helped keep my spirits up lately. A connection to home I guess.

Sure, there's plenty of shitty stuff around, but I complain all I can to get it out of my system.

My girlfriend, on the other hand...she has to deal with ME LOL.

I cried at a little at the end of my work day. I am not depressed though like I would have been a month or two ago. I am getting my big spring mood boost (Although I haven't been officially diagnosed with SAD I am pretty sure I have it.). Just as I tend to sadness and hibernation in winter, I tend towards happiness and energy in the spring as my base mood. I have a good chance of getting a better job where they told me lots of good things about me and my role. It gives me hope that I'll get to leave the hell hole where I work, where I developed my sinus problems and my anxiety disorder. After this week at work, I don't feel bad at all about leaving eiter.

I HATE my job; well specifically I hate one person I work with which makes going to work a living hell. I get stomach aches every day. Right now I am dreading tomorrow. I have to get out, I know that but there are so few jobs in my field (and I am not willing to do anything outside my field- biology-right now). Plus I am a part-time grad student with a deadline for a paper in a week that I have barely begun. I should be working on it right now; instead I feel like playing video games or watching tv.

A long-term relationship ended leaving me feeling worthless and hopeless, shortly after my firm was acquired and I was demoted. There's little point to my life these days but I'll just keep busy and wait for the bell to toll. I am looking forward to seeing my first Red Sox game this year, though.

Since I was 12 to now, (17). Right now I'm on Prozac and I'm about to start Trazadone. I've been on soooo many meds, but this one really helps. I can relate to the posts about thinking about death every few seconds. About a year and a half ago I started to get better though... I hope it keeps up.

I've been battling depression since I was 15 years old. My late teens and early 20s were a nightmare, but I fought it everyday. I think what saved me was becoming a radio dj. It brought me out of myself. I usually go through about a three week period of deep depression every three to four months. I can feel it coming on like a severe storm. I just get myself prepared for it. The past couple of years have been rough due to financial problems, but I'll make it. I have for the last 28 years. There's no point in quitting now.

I see the people around me, and so many are on some meds for something, and I thank god everyday that I have had no need for anything yet.
And I saw someone yesterday that I hadn't seen a a few weeks and that made me happy.

Tomorrow my answer might be different. I've been battling depression for about 5 years now.

Clinical depression keeps me feeling a little blue and a five o'clock shadow keeps me looking a little blue, so there is a sort of cosmic symmetry in my life.

Khash.

I really wouldn't mind paying so much if more of the money was actually spent in the best interests of all of us rather than funneled into defense and other Bushista industries.

I had a couple of remissions, but currently it's pretty bad. It got worse after 9-11 and even worse when I realized Shrub didn't give a flying crap about those who died and was using the incident for political gain, launching wars on sovereign countries.

Although there is a definite biological factor, my current situation makes everything look pretty bleak. I'm relying on fundy, reich-wing family. I see the fundies and reich-wingers as part of the huge problem America is in and I find it very hard to tolerate (let alone like) most of the people in my life. They're all heavily into the fundy and/or reich-wing mindset.

Four years ago I received ECT (electro-convulsive therapy). It helped for awhile, but I'm pretty low again. It seems like no matter what I do, it just gets worse. I'm afraid to do ECT again. The first time was no picnic. It was terrifying and I developed temporary amnesia.

So, yeah, I'm not a terribly happy camper these days. Only music gives me pleasure and some days I can't even make music.

There were other things going on in my life: we had just moved, I was getting my wisdom teeth out in a few days, I had recently failed my driver's test for the third time, and our plant had moved and consolidated with some people who were very rude to me. 9-11 though made me, a relatively young adult, realize that I might not have a future, as far as my whole life ahead of me. This made me more anxiety ridden than I had been in the past and it has made you more depressed. I think that it is normal to be unhappy or nervous about what is happening in our world.
I agree with you about music. It helps keep me grounded. I like listening to as well as playing my keyboard. I was so upset when I couldn't listen to music anymore at work because it helped keep me from getting to much anxiety or having panic attacks. Do you like listening to music too? Does that help? What instrument do you play?

I'm a fairly decent alto and taking lessons to improve.

I sang this to a crappy midi a couple of years ago: On My Own. I hope I've improved since then. :)

It is good to have something to you enjoy and are good at and continue to improve with. My best friend has done that with guitar. I do a couple different things, but not enough and to the extent that I should to get the kind of feeling that he gets by playing his guitar.
I am trying to listen to your tape. For some reason, I am having a difficult time playing it though.

I also suffer from panic attacks. I'll be starting medication for that on Monday. :)

I don't know if I should give you my experiences because everyone is different. I had bad luck with SSRIs, one made me feel indifferent and the other made my anxiety a lot worse. I actually felt better in general when they gave me a beta blocker, but I had mild high blood pressure too.
I take aprazalam (Xanax) if I have an attack. It works rather well. I carry them with me everywhere but don't take them unless I feel that I need to. My mother-in-law whose panic attacks had gotten disabling takes them a few times per day (or more). She has become addicted and her doctor enables her addiction. This is a real concern for this drug. they should only be taken regularly for a short time.
Oh, I went through an anxiety support group/cognitive behaviorial therapy class. It worked great, especially during the class and in the months after. I guess that I should continue practing my deep breathing. It really helps.

but I got my medical insurance back. (Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!:bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:) I'll be going back on Zoloft on Monday. Thank God. Zoloft really does help with panic attacks. It doesn't do so much for depression, though. Is there anything I could go on that would treat them both? I hope so.

I was also on Paxil, but I just slept all the time. I don't want to go on that anymore. :(

I thought that Zoloft was suppose to be better for depression than panic attacks. I think that we are a little different brain chemistry wise and react differently. I am glad that it helps with your panic attacks though. Trying different drugs can be kind of scary especially if you do have a couple different problems. For example, since you get panic attacks, you would probably be more suseptible to the increased anxiety side effect and sometimes unexpected phyisical side effects can bring on panic attacks.
Have you tried any kind of couseling or group therapy. Does your insurance pay for that? My insurance pays for five sessions per year, which doesn't seem like it would help much. If I get this new job, I would have to pay $20 per session but could get up to $30 of these sessions per year.

but my campus has free counseling for students.

I think I may have to visit them sometime.

My anxiety problems didn't get really bad until after college, but sometimes I wish that I would have visited the college counselors. If the service is free and convient, you might as well try it.

Thanks for the great advice, Nikia! :hi:

I lost the man I considered to be my father. My biological father walked out on me when I was two. Then the news out of Iraq is just plain old depressing. I cannot imagine what those families are going through. :cry: Not a happy day.

Life is easy...all you really have to do is breath. All problems we have is an illusion. I live by the story..once there was a man who complained he had no shoes, till he met a man with no feet.