No Child Left Behind: the football version

1. All teams must make the state playoffs, and all will win the championship. If a team does not win the championship, they will be on probation until they are the champions, and coaches will be held accountable.

2. All kids will be expected to have the same football skills at the same time and in the same conditions. No exceptions will be made for those that don't have an interest in football, a desire to perform athletically, or genetic abilities or disabilities. All kids will play football at a proficient level.

3. Talented players will be asked to work out on their own without instruction. This is because the coaches will be using all their instructional time with the athletes who aren't interested in football, have limited athletic ability or whose parents don't like football.

4. Games will be played year round, but statistics will only be kept in the 4th, 8th, and 11th games.

5. This will create a new age of sports where every school is expected to have the same level of talent and all teams will reach the same minimal goals.

If no child gets ahead, then no child will be left behind.

NGU.

forwarding this to a few of my RW friends.....

I am going to school to be a teacher and work full time in a school. My mom sent it to me and I passed it along at my school.

I think there should be another thing added to that list.
- All teams are required to provide uniforms and equipment for every child. The Federal government will promise to fund this, but will fail to do so, forcing local school boards to make cuts to pay for all of this.

It is pretty funny and basically true. Sadly, not all kids can learn how to read. Teaching has become so technical that by the 2nd grade it seems kids get it or they don't. In our education system, if a kid can't read they can't learn. Does that mean they are dumb, no. It means they learn different ways. How many adults read a lot? Not that many. That doesn't mean they aren't contributing to our society.

I have heard that you get in trouble when you use the word everything to describe something. All NCLB is going to do is destroy public education and help private schools, allow rethugs to promote vouchers, and make the gap between wealthy and poor wider.