LOL! Saint GWB.

Subject: GWB is a Saint

President Bush was scheduled to worship at a small Methodist Church outside
Washington, D.C. as part of Karl Rove's campaign to reverse Bush's rapidly
deteriorating approval ratings. A week before the visit, Rove called on the
Methodist Bishop who was scheduled to preach on the chosen Sunday.

"As you know, Bishop," began Rove, "we've been getting a lot of bad
publicity among Methodists because of the president's position on stem cell
research and the like. We'd gladly arrange for Jack Abramoff's friends to
make a contribution of $100,000 to the church if during your sermon you would
say that President Bush is a saint."

The Bishop thought about it for a few minutes, and finally said, "This
parish is in rather desperate need of funds ... I'll agree to do it."

The following Sunday, Bush pompously showed up for the photo op, looking
especially smug even while attempting to appear pious.

After making a few announcements, the Bishop began his homily: "George W.
Bush is a petty, vindictive, sanctimonious hypocrite and a nitwit. He is a
liar, a cheat, and a low-intelligence weasel with the world's largest chip
on his shoulder. He used every dirty election trick in the book and still
lost, but his toadies in the Supreme Court appointed him. He lied about his
military record in which he used special privilege to avoid combat, and then
had the gall to dress up and pose on an aircraft carrier before a banner
stating "Mission Accomplished." He invaded a sovereign country for oil and
war profiteering, turning Iraq into a training ground for terrorists who
would destroy our country. He continues to confuse the American people by
insisting on a nonexistent connection between the horrors of 9/11 and the reason he
started his war in Iraq. He routinely appoints incompetent and unqualified cronies
to high-level federal government positions and as a result, hundreds and hundreds of
Americans died tragically in New Orleans. He lets corporate polluters despoil God's
creation and doom our planet. He uses fear-mongering to justify warrantless
spying on American citizens, in clear violation of our Constitution. He is
so psychotic and megalomaniacal that he believes that he was chosen by God.
He is the worst example of a Methodist I have ever personally known. But
compared to Dick Cheney and Karl Rove and the rest of the evil fascist
bastards in this administration, George W. Bush is a saint."

Thanks for posting this.

... but it fits here.

but he sure deserved to get it as far as I'm concerned!

:rofl:

:bounce:

phrases and drawing out the ending?--I would love to hear Keillor recite this.

NoFederales