It's Over, Shut Up, Go Home!

It’s Over, Shut Up, Go Home!
By Nancy Greggs

Look, I know it’s not just me. Everytime I see a Republican – whether elected representative, spokesperson, pundit, whatever – on my TV screen these days, I can’t help but ask the question: Just exactly who are these people talking to? And more to the point, who is still listening?

Victory in Iraq is just around the corner, the War on Terror is winnable, we’ve got to Fight ‘em Over There – shouldn’t somebody have told these guys that their show was cancelled back in November? Why are they still on the air?

I suppose the answer is that we’re in rerun season; it’s the only logical explanation for the fact that the same old crapola is being spewed night after night. And if they’re hoping to capture a new audience that hasn’t seen the series before, well, good luck with that.

John McCain’s Dog ‘n’ Pony Show is the perfect case in point. Imagine basing a program on the premise of Baghdad being a safe place? Note to John: If I wanted to see a disaster, I would have rented The Hindenberg; at least nobody died making that film.

And how many times is that so-called liberal media going to air Bush’s long-defunct (and debunked) “Support the Troops”. I know the MSM news types don’t keep up with, uh, the news, but surely the stories about Walter Reed have penetrated some of those hair-dos.

As for Cheney, why is he still hosting Uncle Dick’s Fairytale Theatre? “Oh, Uncle Dick, tell us that story about the connection between Saddam Hussein and Al Qaeda again – you know how we never get tired of it!” Who isn’t sick unto death over that pile? The least his writers could do is come up with some episodes about smaller government and fiscal responsibility – I mean, if you’re going to trot out pure fantasy, those topics would seem to be ripe with phantasmagoric possibilities.

Then there’s the GOP’s Global Warming Ha Ha Ha Show, which is loosely based on one of those math problems you got back in grade school. “If a train leaves Inhofe Station, traveling backwards at a thousand centuries per hour …” You get the idea. The Republicans don’t get it, but I guess that’s the appeal.

With all of the Gonzo brouhaha, you’d think there would be a mid-season replacement sizzler in the works. But apparently not, because the only premiere anybody really wants to see is the spin-off show, Goodlin’ Talkin’, and she goes and pleads the fifth! Well, there’s one more potential Emmy down the drain.

The real disappointment of this spring’s TV line-up is the ever-unpopular Coulter on Coulter, featuring the same old/same old stand-up routine, this week punctuated by a starving kid from Darfur providing the rim-shots. Just when you think this tired hag has run out of people to hate and/or insult, she digs deeper into the garbage heap and comes up with some other steamin’ pile to foist on the public. “Hello, is this thing on? Is this an audience or just an oil painting?” It's time we find out who this administration outsourced the old vaudeville hook job to, and wake him up.

And how many times are they going to drag out the PNAC boys to allegedly entertain us with their razzle-dazzle? Their appearances are a cross between Jeopardy and Medium, kind of a game show where the audience gets to bet on how often their predictions will be right. The only problem is that the audience knows the answer: It’s ALWAYS going to be zero times, which tends to take the suspense out of the equation for everyone but the brain-dead.

But the Republicans, of course, are still intent on rerunning the same tired old garbage, feigning ignorance of the fact that this season’s runaway hit is Everybody Loves Nancy, the only program that is bound to not only survive, but go on to garner all kinds of awards, domestically and internationally.

So I can’t help but wonder why these GOPers are still getting air-time, considering how small their viewing audience has become. Honestly, how long can you keep preaching to the last vestiges of the choir: those who still think Iraq is on the verge of democracy, those who still believe crazed Muslims are going to kill them at the local mall, those who still take anything this administration says seriously?

Talk about an infinitesimal audience share …

Who’s listening? Well, I guess there’s still the American Idle – those too lazy to switch the channel from FOX-News.

Other than that, these BushCo talking heads have only one real programming gem left. It’s called Discuss Amongst Yourselves, and they’re obviously determined to play it for all it’s worth – which, at this juncture, isn’t much.

I give it six weeks – tops.

I love that. :)

Nancy, have any of the newspapers who used to run Molly Ivon's columns contacted you? They should.

You are a great writer in the same vein as Ivins. JeffR and I will do the promo shots! :)

:)

The same fucking idiots who sat home thinking that Roseanne Barr was funny while Reagun was raping our sister in our own back yard.

not realizing that Shrubbie was it.

Soooo on point and hilarious, thank you!!!:applause: :rofl: :kick:

yr rockin' tonite, lady!

that I have noticed over and over recently is that they reallllly don't get it when their tactics are no longer working. It's like if something worked once, they assume it will always work! Slow.

I can't help but wonder who FINALLY talked them out of pulling another "Terror Alert" scam when Bush's numbers fell off the edge of the earth, and the Dems started passing out the subpoenas.

It must have broken a lot of neocon hearts the day THAT music died ...

the more the Neocons fail to abandon their own idiot juggernaut, the more damage they do to themselves. By repeating the same identical tactics, in spite of massive shifts in the political wind, the neocons succeed only in pointing out how wrong they ALWAYS were. Perhaps more importantly, it makes them look non-responsive. Even conservatives want to feel their legislators are responding to the desires of the constituents.

piece of writing! thank you!

I see you've been with us for a while - glad you've joined the conversation!

:hi:

i've been lurking till i figure out how it works. but a post like yours can't go without mention!

Now that you're getting the hang of it, I hope I'll be seeing you on the boards a lot more in future!

:hi:

I Love Nancy! THE WORLD LOVES NANCY!!
She's really good (and you are too, Nancy). ;)

Used to HATE the fact that I was named Nancy, and have rarely met a namesake who wasn't in my age group (i.e. we thus named due to Sinatra's hit "Nancy With the Laughing Face", and the fact that he had a wife, and later a daughter, of that name).

I can only wonder now how many newborn Nancys there will be in the months, and years, to come .. . thanks to a woman who has brought such pride to the country -- and to the name!

by the Nancys, I have no doubt there would be intelligent and real security, excellent diplomacy, professional health care and illness prevention for all, better education for all, better environment, better transit systems, etc.

If only the country could... but the war-profiteering idiots and their lemmings don't want that so, they catapult their silly mantras.


I'd love Nancy to rule in all fairness for once! (It's urgent!)

...But I changed it 22 years ago. It's now Anja. (Long story where that one came from)

My biggest problem was I always thought the name Nancy belonged to a petite, spunky chick and I'm 6'1, 155 pounds and pretty damn clumsy. And I remember thinking Nancy Reagan had obvious bad taste cuz she changed her name TO Nancy.

I hope Ms Pelosi rehabilitates the name. (She's short and takes no shit from anyone---far less condescending than petite and spunky) You're right, it's gonna freak me out to meet 15 year old Nancys in 2022.

Back OT....great rant as always (former) namesake!!!

Both are creations of the CIA.

You still see GOP faces showing up regularly on the cable shows peddling their used goods. Over and over again! I just saw Kyl out there pushing his same-old, same-old. YAWN!

The cable shows need to shake themselves out of their rut and offer more progressive voices. Please!

As usual, Nance an excellent piece!

Seldom do I laugh aloud when reading DU posts. I laughed aloud several times reading this. So, Nance, when's the column getting national syndication? :)

"It's time we find out who this administration outsourced the old vaudeville hook job to, and wake him up."

I think it's about time Congress wake and use the 'hook' more aggressively.

I just watch HGTV, Discovery, Court TV, and a dash of TLC.

:kick: & :toast:

as always.

Global Warming Ha Ha Show, hilarious and sooo true.

Absolutely recommended.