You DON'T Say

By Nancy Greggs

Were we living in normal times, we’d be hearing all about the glorious accomplishments of the Republican administration and its party members as we head into the 2008 election. The GOP would be pointing proudly to the strides they’d made in education and health care, national security and the economy, along with bolstering our leadership role internationally through diplomatic efforts and strengthened ties with our global neighbors.

Of course, these are not normal times at all. And more to the point, there are no such accomplishments to be bragged about, to be proffered as a reason for wanting Republicans in charge of anything more intellectually taxing than – well, than clearing brush in Texas.

The Great Kahuna, Newt Gingrich, has already laid down the rules for GOP hopefuls in terms of what subjects shouldn’t be talked about, lest the populace be reminded of the failures of the Bush presidency, aided and abetted by a Republican majority.

And the list of unmentionables is rather substantial.

The first rule of what is now becoming the Flight Club is: Don’t talk about the War. It appears the Republicans who cheerleaded this major fiasco are gearing up to distance themselves from it come September, and it will be amusing to see how they plan to accomplish that feat. In other words, they’ve set a timetable for pulling the plug – but alas, still have no exit strategy when it comes to explaining away their support for the past four years. Way to go.

What about discussing the unprecedented national debt, the unsecured borders, the price of gas and the profits of Big Oil? Don’t, don’t, don’t and definitely don’t.

Even the traditional GOP talking points have to be discarded, given the unpleasant reality associated with each of them.

Supporting the troops? Walter Reed. Integrity brought back to D.C. politics? Jack Abramoff. Moral values? Mark Foley. Competent government? Michael Brown, Alberto Gonzales. Fiscal responsibility? Billions missing in Iraq. Smaller, non-intrusive government? Wire-tapping of citizens. The party of law and order? Signing statements, the US attorney scandal.

And that’s just the story so far. As subpoenas are issued and investigations proceed, there may be a whole lot more that can’t be mentioned in the months to come.

It would seem that the GOP is down to talking about the weather, but even that’s off-limits in these heady times when the topic might lead to a discussion about global warming. Immediately one thinks of the old adage that it’s better to be silent and thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.

As we saw in the recent Republican debate, there is always the option of pretending the current administration never happened, and instead harkening back to the halcyon days of St. Ronnie – when the country was in the hands of a half-wit instead of a full-fledged idiot. And no doubt those who are still waiting for that famous trickle-down theory to work to their advantage will be just as anxious to vote GOP as the deliriously happy residents of New Orleans.

So if you see a man or woman standing utterly mute on a stage in your city or town over the next year, staring mindlessly into space, that’s not a mime – that’s just a Republican campaigning on the strengths of their party’s past performance.