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Bill Clinton: 'Screw It, I'm Running For President'

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Traveling_Home Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 12:53 PM
Original message
Bill Clinton: 'Screw It, I'm Running For President'
The Onion telling Truth to Power!!

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/bill_clinton_screw_it_im_running

CHARLESTON, SC—After spending two months accompanying his wife, Hillary, on the campaign trail, former president Bill Clinton announced Monday that he is joining the 2008 presidential race, saying he "could no longer resist the urge."

"My fellow Americans, I am sick and tired of not being president," said Clinton, introducing his wife at a "Hillary '08" rally. "For seven agonizing years, I have sat idly by as others experienced the joys of campaigning, debating, and interacting with the people of this great nation, and I simply cannot take it anymore. I have to be president again. I have to."

He continued, "It is with a great sense of relief that I say to all of you today, 'Screw it. I'm in.'"

In a show of respect, Clinton then completed his introduction of Hillary Clinton, calling her a "wonderful wife and worthy political adversary," and warmly shook her hand as she approached the podium. A clearly shocked Mrs. Clinton got halfway through her speech about the nation's obligation to its children before walking briskly offstage.

-MORE-
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zanne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 12:56 PM
Response to Original message
1. ROFL!
And that ain't fiction!
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havocmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 12:56 PM
Response to Original message
2. If such a threat were real, it is probably the ONLY thing that would move the GOP
to actually insist on preserving, protecting, defending . . .
the Constitution of the United States of America.
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Doc Farmers Mama Donating Member (7 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 01:00 PM
Response to Reply #2
5. That's the truth!
I wish he could run again. It would be a slam dunk win for the Dems.
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Algorem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 12:58 PM
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3. He could run against his pal GHW Bush.He can get 4 more years.
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cobalt1999 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 01:00 PM
Response to Original message
4. LOL.
If he could have he'd still be running and winning his 5 term.
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Debi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 01:00 PM
Response to Original message
6. The Onion - not too far away from the truth...
:P
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Occam Bandage Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 01:03 PM
Response to Original message
7. I like "As Obese Population Rises, Candidates Court the Fat Vote."
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DJ13 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 01:05 PM
Response to Original message
8. He might as well
I know where he stands, his wife's message is getting buried by his actions.
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Rageneau Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 01:59 PM
Response to Original message
9. Clinton/Clinton in '08!!
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OzarkDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 02:04 PM
Response to Original message
10. LOL! Great article!
I love Big Dog, always will.
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robertpaulsen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-23-08 04:39 PM
Response to Original message
11. "I goddamn love being president"
Ah, those were the days!
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