To Be A Republican You Need To Believe:

To be a Republican you need to believe: (from email)


1. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

2. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's Daddy
made war on him , a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad
guy when Bush needed a 'we can't find Bin Laden' diversion.

3. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade
with China and Viet Nam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

4. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest
national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq .

5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but
multinational drug corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind
without regulation.

6. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in
speeches, while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

8. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our longtime allies, then
demand their cooperation and money.

9. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing
health care to all Americans is socialism. HMOs and insurance companies
have the best interests of the public at heart.

10. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but
creationism should be taught in schools.

11. A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable
offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which tens of
thousands die is solid defense policy.

12. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution,
which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet .

13. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a
conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for
your recovery.

14. You support 'Executive Privilege' for every Republican ever born, who
will be born or who might be born (in perpetuity.)

15. Support hunters who shoot their friends and blame them for wearing
orange vests similar to those worn by the quail.

with my sister. Number 15, however, was new and made coffee appear on the screen.

I'd only add that torture, war, and intolerance are Christian values.

K & R'd

:hi:

Like the poster above, I loved #15 too!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jennifer-nix/crunchy-cons-obama-and-e_b_85910.html

while I was listening to this show about RW meltdown

http://www.onpointradio.org/shows/2008/02/20080211_a_main.asp

Interesting confluence of shifting paradigms for sure.

k&r!

I don't accept it when r's use them against us, and I think it's a bad idea to use our own. All they do is prevent meaningful conversation.

That's gotta be one of the most ridiculous replies to a lighthearted thread I've ever seen!!!!!

Having a sense of humor isn't your forte, I take it? :rofl:

It's about the billionth time I've seen that list. And I've seen the Republican response just as much. I've also met too many people who don't think they're jokes...

To be a Republican you need to believe: (from email)


1. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

2. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's Daddy
made war on him , a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad
guy when Bush needed a 'we can't find Bin Laden' diversion.

3. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade
with China and Viet Nam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

4. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest
national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq .

5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but
multinational drug corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind
without regulation.

6. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in
speeches, while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

8. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our longtime allies, then
demand their cooperation and money.

9. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing
health care to all Americans is socialism. HMOs and insurance companies
have the best interests of the public at heart.

10. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but
creationism should be taught in schools.

11. A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable
offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which tens of
thousands die is solid defense policy.

12. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution,
which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet .

13. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a
conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for
your recovery.

14. You support 'Executive Privilege' for every Republican ever born, who
will be born or who might be born (in perpetuity.)

15. Support hunters who shoot their friends and blame them for wearing
orange vests similar to those worn by the quail.


HAHAHAHA Make it a billion and one times now fucker. Lighten up francis!!! :rofl:

#3 is my favorite.

Geez - lighten up Harold.

:)

Damn him for being an Obama supporter. I'm so confused.

did you see that the Arsenal's next FA cup match is on pay per view? $15! Frickin frick...

Blackburn today. ManU at the weekend. AC Milan in the Champions League next week.

Come on you Gunners!

I'm cautiously optimistic. :)

we need to be careful. I hope that Flamini gives him a few hard tackles to let him know that we mean business. I'm in Mexico next week so hopefully I'll be able to find a place to watch the game.

And yeah... Kaka... *sigh*

Mad Dog in the Fog has Setanta and all of the satellite channels. You can call them the day before and find out when they're showing the game.

Man, that'd be awesome.

There's a couple bars here that show them... on a small tv in the corner... with the volume turned down. x(

It's very easy to find a soccer game in San Francisco. There's an Irish pub just around the corner from my office where I'll catch the Champions League games if I can. It's usually packed on gamedays. Where do you live?

2-0 to the Arsenal today. Goals from Senderos and Adebayor. Top of the league again!

And Adebayor's on my fantasy team... so YAY! :D :D :D :D

I live north of Dallas... there's a new soccer bar that's supposed to be opening up next to Pizza Hut Park... I can't wait... FINALLY a place to watch with other fans. :)

Don't say I never gaver you nothin'.

http://msn.foxsports.com/soccer/story/802702

yes, the bars I went to were on that list. It's a sad, sad state of affairs down here. x(