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G.I. Joe didn't deserve his medals

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quaoar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-13-04 09:55 PM
Original message
G.I. Joe didn't deserve his medals
Hysterical story on Salon:

http://www.salon.com/opinion/feature/2004/08/14/gijoe/index.html

WASHINGTON -- As G.I. Joe, the leader of America's daring, highly trained special missions force, celebrates his 40th anniversary this summer, a group of veterans has aired television advertisements attacking his military record. The ads, purchased by G.I. Joe Veterans for Truth, accuse Joe of lying about his war record and letting villains escape throughout the 1985-86 war against Cobra, Destro and the forces of evil.

In one 60-second ad, veterans of the two-year-long, completely televised war -- in which every weekday afternoon American troops fought Cobra, a ruthless terrorist organization determined to rule the world -- speak out about G.I. Joe. "I served with G.I. Joe," says one veteran, Thomas Ross. "G.I. Joe is no real American hero."

In interviews yesterday arranged by G.I. Joe Veterans for Truth, a nonprofit arm of a little-known think tank called Serpentine Enterprises, the veterans -- low-level G.I. Joe foot soldiers, all code-named "grunts" -- were unanimous in describing Joe as an incompetent leader unfit for command and not worthy of honor. Rogers, a blue laser gunner 1st class, described the ordeal he was put through during the celebrated incident in which the entire male leadership of the Joe team was hypnotized by the Baroness and her Conch of the Sirens.

"Our entire platoon was ordered to attack Cobra base just to free all these addlepated G.I. Joes," Robertson said. "We risked our lives to save the Joes -- not the other way around." During the pitched battle, Robertson disarmed and captured three Cobra soldiers by shooting a nearby tree with his blue laser gun, causing the tree to fall on the enemy, trapping them. "I was dodging red lasers left and right," Robertson added. "G.I. Joe said he'll fight for freedom wherever there's trouble. That was a lie."
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Jonnycat26 Donating Member (28 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-13-04 09:57 PM
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1. Amazing
Wow... this is priceless good fun. :)
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olddem43 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-13-04 10:13 PM
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2. G.I. Joe was around in the '60s but somehow avoided 'Nam.
I guess his box was checked "do not volunteer for overseas duty"
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Sparkly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-13-04 10:14 PM
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3. Plus, later he attended protests with Hanoi Barbie.
There are pictures!
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BOHICA06 Donating Member (886 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-13-04 10:25 PM
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4. Funny but...
the 60s GI Joe didn't wear decorations of valor. Maybe the 1/3 size wannabes of the 80s did, but not the scarred-faced "fighting man from head to toe." At least he didn't wear them in my foorlocker!! :)
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quaoar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-13-04 10:35 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. No Silver Star?
But I'll bet he shot himself so he could get a Purple Heart, right?
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Sparkly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-13-04 10:36 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. That would explain his lack of
manliness.

I'm sure he only meant to shoot his leg, though.
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Hippo_Tron Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-13-04 11:04 PM
Response to Original message
7. Funny that GI Joe's opponent can't name one person...
Who served in the national guard with him.
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