LOL !!! - In Case You Guys May Have Missed This...

A Mighty Wind blows through Republican convention

Heather Mallick
CBC.ca
September 5, 2008

<snip>

I assume John McCain chose Sarah Palin as his vice-presidential partner in a fit of pique because the Republican money men refused to let him have the stuffed male shirt he really wanted. She added nothing to the ticket that the Republicans didn't already have sewn up, the white trash vote, the demographic that sullies America's name inside and outside its borders yet has such a curious appeal for the right.

So why do it?

It's possible that Republican men, sexual inadequates that they are, really believe that women will vote for a woman just because she's a woman. They're unfamiliar with our true natures. Do they think vaginas call out to each other in the jungle night? I mean, I know men have their secret meetings at which they pledge to do manly things, like being irresponsible with their semen and postponing household repairs with glue and used matches. Guys will be guys, obviously.

But do they not know that women have been trained to resent other women and that they only learn to suppress this by constantly berating themselves and reading columns like this one? I'm a feminist who understands that women can nurse terrible and delicate woman hatred.

Palin was not a sure choice, not even for the stolidly Republican ladies branch of Citizens for a Tackier America. No, she isn't even female really. She's a type, and she comes in male form too.

John Doyle, the cleverest critic in Canada, comes right out and calls Palin an Alaska hillbilly. Damn his eyes, I wish I'd had the wit to come up with it first. It's safer than "white trash" but I'll pluck safety out of the nettle danger. Or something.

Doyle's job includes watching a lot of reality television and he's well-versed in the backstory. White trash — not trailer trash, that's something different — is rural, loud, proudly unlettered (like Bush himself), suspicious of the urban, frankly disbelieving of the foreign, and a fan of the American cliché of authenticity. The semiotics are pure Palin: a sturdy body, clothes that are clinging yet boxy and a voice that could peel the plastic seal off your new microwave.

Palin has a toned-down version of the porn actress look favoured by this decade's woman, the overtreated hair, puffy lips and permanently alarmed expression. Bristol has what is known in Britain as the look of the teen mum, the "pramface." Husband Todd looks like a roughneck; Track, heading off to Iraq, appears terrified. They claim to be family obsessed while being studiously terrible at parenting. What normal father would want Levi "I'm a fuckin' redneck" Johnson prodding his daughter?

I know that I have an attachment to children that verges on the irrational, but why don't the Palins? I'm not the one preaching homespun values but I'd destroy that ratboy before I'd let him get within scenting range of my daughter again, and so would you. Palin's e-mails about the brother-in-law she tried to get fired as a state trooper are fizzing with rage and revenge. Turn your guns on Levi, ma'am.

<snip>

More: http://www.heathermallick.ca/cbc.ca-columns/a-mighty-wind-blows-through-republican-convention.html

:wow:

:evilgrin:

LOL!

over this...

Witticism or not....she was able to make me laugh with the whole "prodding" and "scenting range" will liv on in emphany. Fantastic.

Why, it's just terrible! They can't believe a newspaper supported in part by taxpayers would say such mean things--things we only hear from "the far left" here in America! Megan Kelly was so aghast, her lip gloss nearly slid off her face.

I wouldn't have know about this if they had just shut up about it.

I'd never seen it before today, but thanks to both Faux and Freeps, I get the pleasure of both reading it myself, and posting it here for all of you!

:evilgrin:

:hi:

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

When Johnny McOldFart takes white house ....We will be singing .."BOMB BOMB BOMB" over those Jesus haters

'scenting range' = :rofl:

I was really confused because they quoted this article out of context and made it sound so bad. Now reading a much longer excerpt, I see that Fox News is really fucking crazy. I already knew they were crazy but it's quite obvious that this article is being very satirical and not literal at all. Man, what's funnier is that the outright snit the female Fox News anchor was over Fox New's claim that this article called Palin white trash just proves Mallick's point that "omen can nurse terrible and delicate woman hatred."

What was even funnier was that they were obviously trying to say that Canadian left is so outrageous and because they're all lefties, this reflects badly on the American left and the Democrats.

This whole thread is a riot - and true.

We need more like her here... or, if we do have them, they need to be far more prominent.

Best one yet-can I use it? Pleeeeeeeeeease?:rofl:

:rofl:

:rofl:

"They're unfamiliar with our true natures." Well, if anyone gets a handle on women's true nature, please tell me, or at least make an appropriate Hallmark card.

Does this mean I can call Bristol a 'chav' now? I like 'pramface' though... British slang amuses me to no end.

:thumbsup: