"Another Iraq Vet's Mama for Obama!" said my handmade sign on my little car. Obama wasn't my first pick but as a lifelong Democrat I supported him with all I had.

There were sign wars here on the mountain, in one instance Repukes smashed an Obama sign after a huge McCain/Palin sign was stolen. There were bitter Republican words about the theft in the local paper. When they found out a Republican Sewanee student stole it for his dorm room, no apologies were forthcoming from the local Repukes, of course.

My "campaign" work consisted of talking with as many young people as I could about the issues, pointing out where Dems are better than Repukes and convincing them as best I could to vote for Obama instead of Ron Paul. (Lots of young kids bought Paul's hype.)

I was shocked when McCain made his concession speech. (Was I the only one expecting to wait weeks to find out who the new Pres was? I couldn't believe it was over so soon.) I cried when Obama claimed his well-fought victory. I felt relief wash over me; I felt that strange sensation of ...hope....I hadn't felt in years.

It's been a really rough year. In January '08 a tree knocked out my power and phone lines. I went two months without power in the dead of winter. Fun stuff. The restaurant I sometimes worked for burned down. I was laid off from another job the week after Thanksgiving.

But there were good things, too, I won a Pastry Chef competition (People's Choice award and Best Presentation), saw the attorney I work for win an important appeal, learned how to operate a crane, did a few (paying!) shows and lots of jamming with other musicians, saw one son become Valedictorian of his graduating class at his university and have three other kids able to stay in college, had a beautiful garden that fed me all summer.

Life's that way: the bitter and the sweet.

So it is with this inauguration.

I understand that many people are so weary of the evil we've endured; they NEED this celebration. I understand that. Party on and all that...

But as I return to DU after a year's absence I have to say the cruelty and bullying behavior of some humans remains an embarrassment, especially here.

There are Obama supporters, lifelong Dems, die-hard progressives who - even in this day and age - do not share the same rights as I do simply because of the way nature made them. They have lived an alternate reality, unable to set up their own lives as they see fit, bound by laws and attitudes that are discriminatory, backward and cruel.

That is their reality EVERY DAY of their lives.

At least on DU, they can share their feelings; they don't have to be in lockstep with everyone else. This is a place where they can vent and say, "This is wrong." Or is this that sort of place?

You know, if you see a negative thread about Obama or the inauguration, you don't have to click on it. You don't have to read it. You don't have to agree with it.

What you certainly don't need to do is tell marginalized people that they should just "Stop pissing in our cheerios - you're ruining it for everybody."

These are not fellow human beings upset because Obama isn't wearing their favorite color; their pain is not trivial; what they cannot do in 2009 - marry, share property, fully care for those they love in event of illness - is a bitter reminder that they are not fully Americans.

Bullying those who remain unhappy - simply because YOU'RE happy and HOW DARE THEY intrude on YOUR happiness - is something I expect to see on rightwing sites, not here.

And yet three times today I have clicked on threads that said essentially, "Shut up for a couple of days so you don't mess up our happiness." Gee, I guess it really is all about YOU, huh?

I have seen people pile on posters who dare complain. DUers have even coined a nifty little word to even further shame an already hurting group. How progressive!

It's the nature of internet forums that you'll always have your "resident experts" and your bullies and your hard-hearted types ready to dismiss those who disagree.

But it seems the bullying and demanding silence is over the top. I have not seen posters piling on to ruin the celebratory threads to any significant degree; I have seen plenty of posters piling on the negative threads to insult those with complaints to a large degree.

So it is with mixed feelings that I sit here pondering this new beginning for my nation. It would be nice if some posters made a new beginning as well, and didn't take complaints so damned personally.

Obama can take the heat. But a lot of the bullies around here don't seem to think so.

I for one say: You have a right to be angry, to express your anger and to have that anger validated. You aren't "ruining" anything for anybody.

This is politics, not nursery school. And those who are "so wounded" because you won't A) share in their orgasmic ObamaFest or B) just shut the hell up are acting childish and selfish.

To act as if criticism of Obama "hurts you" more than being a second class citizen hurts those who are second class citizens, to behave as if that criticism is just "ruining" your experience truly reveals more about you than you know.

Congratulations Obama. I won't be watching the inauguration for my own reasons, but I am certainly happy you won.

And I'm proud of all of those who stand up for what they believe even when they are bullied and insulted.

Bittersweet days for certain...

Hang in there :hug:

I thought that it was until two months ago. I would never have predicted the backlash here...one that was pre-emptive in nature. It was cruel. I am straight and a huge Obama supporter. I always was. I can't believe the way fellow Democrats have been treated here. K & R.

I am very ashamed of the bullies here.

Hang in there :hug:

Writing like this keeps bringing me back. :hug:

and you forgot this :hug:

:hug:

(I'm giving out lots of hugs - this place needs 'em!)

:hug:

not that anyone will listen but thanks.

and you most definitely are SOMEBODY!

:hug: Keep on keeping on dsc

for being a DUer and standing up to the bullies.

Here's hoping for better days ahead :hug:

I never thought I would come here and see the blatant selfishness and harrassment going on.

But DU is a treasure because of all the truly good people here, don't let the bullies get to you. Keep fighting the good fight.

:hug:

:thumbsup:

K&R

A lot of folks won't read it, but that's cool.

They might recognize themselves somewhere in those words, huh? And it might be too scary for them to imagine changing, softening their hearts, seeing things from another's point of view.

I am so proud of those DUers who have stayed despite the bullies.

:hug:

thankyou
Thankyou

For dealing with all the bullshit, standing strong and speaking out no matter how much they beat you up.

:hug:

Love that screen name.

Thanks for your support and hang in there :hug:

I've been trying to stay away more than normal for now till things calm down. I'm still going to be around though, and I hope you will too!

this place is worse than crack

:hippie:

As one of many GLBT members of the board that's been taking a break I want to thank you for vocalizing what many of us have been feeling for weeks. Unfortunately some of DU lately has been nothing short of hostile towards us.

I understand why you would want to take a break after what I've read here. But remember it's usually just a small group of attention whores and their groupies doing most of the bashing.

You, as a human being, are more important to me than any inauguration. And I know many, many DUers who share my feelings. Don't let the bullies drown out the love for you here, FreeState

:hug:

but I'm not willing to let the bullies get away with it, not without saying something even if it does no good.

:hug: Hang in there, QC

I've been keeping my words to myself a lot lately since the election, mostly because I see a lot of people upset about things that in my opinion are not worth being upset over. I understand that some people, but not many, are unhappy with what Obama has done so far. My first reaction is to just ignore it until the message board is crammed full of multiple posts all expressing the same outrage, which recently has seemed to me to just be just knee jerk reactions to a supposed slight. Again this is just my opinion. What is knee jerk to one can be valid to another.

What I don't understand is that if complaining should be protected around here, shouldn't those complaining about the complaining be protected to. That is their opinion after all. Looks to me like both sides are about on equal footing. It's also kinda hard to fell sorry for some of the complainers, because they are not innocent either. Most people who try to talk civilly to people that are complaining about something around here are met with chants of DLC, DINOS, or Corporate Dem's or whatever label people feel like handing out to attack anyone that doesn't share their outrage. So I don't really fell sorry for them.

I don't know of any solution other than to tell both sides to deal with it. One day I will complain about something I think is valid and people will tell me to shut up. Will that stop me? Probably not, but it's their right to tell me to.

This is an adult discussion board. When I open a discussion page, there are slots for dozens of threads. Not one or two. Dozens.

You have your pick of threads. You can certainly disagree with any of those threads.

But this trend has gone beyond that. Piling on someone, telling people to "just shut up," and comparing your momentary discomfort to someone else's lifelong agony are certainly "allowed" here, but why would any adult lower themselves to this behavior?

A lot of people complaining resort to the same tactics as those they disagree with. I don't know why. I know I'm guilty of doing both especially if I'm arguing with a republican. I agree it is childish, but that's something that unfortunately will never change.

There are a LOT fewer incidents of GLBT people (or their straight allies) bursting into "Yippee, Obama!" threads and telling people to stop cheering.

Anyone who is disturbed enough by the honest assessment of Obama's lack of concern for GLBT people to bust into a thread and start yelling at/lecturing/condescening to the angry people there is NOT supportive of gay rights, and deserves what they get.

When you're an oppressed minority posting about a politician who has let you down (more than once), I will not be the one telling you to shut up. I will have your back. Because I know what it's like. Too bad more people don't feel the same.

imagine) to see people equate their "discomfort" over criticism of Obama with the very real pain felt by GLBT folks. EVERY DAY OF THEIR LIVES they have to live with continued discrimination.

How can any grown, sane, progressive, thinking person compare the two?

Hang in there Toasterlad and I got your back as well :hug:

:hug:

Or my ignore list has the right people in it.

:hug: It has brought me nearly to tears.

Just know that you are loved and appreciated here!

:hug:

:applause: + :patriot:

:hug:

maybe pop over in to the cooking and baking group and tell us foodies about your pastry competition? I think we all would like that too.

:)

When I can donate I will do just that.

My creation was zapotle truffles. I made 800 of them but I only needed 650. The staff kept eating them all. It was the only time I've ever considered the wisdom of tasers!

:hug:

I see that star by your name

see ya in C&B

:hi:

:) I just came back in here and saw that...if I had come in earlier I would have done it too!

Needy foodies, we are so pathetic :)

:hide:

:blush:

and a new story

:)

:hi:

:hi:

and we miss you in C&B

welcome back :pals:

AND it's always nice to throw Skinner et al. a couple extra bux yanno?

That is the nicest thing anyone's said to me lately! The folks in C&B have always been a delight to read even when I couldn't post. I'm glad I can join you'ns again! I added a new story, too...

:yourock:

DU is awesome and I will be over there soon!

:hug:

Come on over when you get a chance!

no matter where the star came from.

I'll be over there soon! No excuses! :)

some kind soul beat me to it...but I would have (yeah, they all say that AFTERWARD) :)

We will love your stories, most of us are not competively cooking and we would to hear about it in case one of us gets adventerous! BUT, we are a pretty good bunch

and I know you meant it, too.

I'm glad to be back here. I really have missed DU. But i suppose I better get off this computer. With dialup, I've been on here all day!

Love to you mtnester and enjoy this week whatever you are doing. I look forward to lots more C&B chat. :yourock:

:thumbsup:

:kick:

hang in there!!! :hug:

:thumbsup:

:hug:

for your support and for speaking up.

I honestly figured this would drop like a rock or that I would get hit by some flaming rocks, but there is only the sound of crickets from those who might be so wounded that the inauguration is "just RUINED" for them by this post.

Hang in there, Political_Junkie :hug:

So rare on DU! The tiny minds bully brigade is on the rampage, but they are no match for actual grown up people with facts and passion and the ability to communicate. I've been told to shut up by far better people than the twerps here, and I've not shut up yet.
Thanks a million for being all Democratic and all!

I always thought that what set Dems apart from Pukes is that we don't treat our own politicians like Gods or toddlers. We criticize, we hold their feet to the fire.

It's a glorious day for our nation in many ways, and I haven't gone on any celebratory threads to bash anybody's sincere happiness. But I'm also not so blinded by the ebullient mood here that I forget those who have been deeply wounded by the very real betrayal they feel right now.

And dammit, they should be able to come here and vent without censure!!!

:hug:

is sort of a Toddler-God.

How soon people forget that unwavering support for ANY politician is a bad thing.

Let's hope they rein in their exuberance with a bit of reality from time to time.

:)

This has been a weird place to come to for comfort lately. A longtime friend came in town last week who is both black and gay and it was very interesting to hear his perspective, given that he has what we decided to call a "double whammy of discrimination".

There's been much too much of "STFU" around here lately. Everyone on attack mode.

Although yesterday I was quite upset (unfortunately, I'm kinda serious) because for an entire thread people dogged on the song "American Pie". I really wanted to jump in and ask them if they knew the significance of the song. I decided against it, but I'm sure you know "the day the music died".
Buddy Holly's plane crash. Thanks for a beautifully written post.:hi:

For worst song ever. I read that thread and just groaned at some of the songs they dredged up.

I guess when it comes to music everybody's tastes are different but still, the folks who said the words were just nonsense kind of puzzled me.

People sometimes want to do that song as a singalong at parties so I have it all printed in teeny, teeny letters on one page lol.

Weird Al did a version About Luke Skywalker and my kids memorized the whole damned thing and would sing it on car trips. Oy!!!

Thanks for your words and a :hug: for you, too,

Love, love love to you :hug:

Don't let the assholes get you down. And I hope I never see anybody call you the ugly names I've heard you were called.

This isn't about an invocation or a prayer or an inauguration. It's about being mature enough to listen and to TRY and understand.

The world isn't coming to an end because some DUers aren't particularly thrilled with some of Obama's choices so far. And their criticism is certainly no reason to be cruel or thoughtless.

But some people are so full of themselves for FSM's sake, they think they can be downright mean and as long as a few other posters cheer them on it's all peachy.

Hang in there, LIV :)

Now I'm gonna cry ..... :loveya:

Thanks.

What's so crazy about peace, love and understanding? Or open discussion, sharing thoughts and expressing hurt, for that matter?

:hug:

:thumbsup: :hug:

You are appreciated here so much.

:hug:

DU needs you. Don't forget that!

:hug:

but I don't feel nearly as useful since Election Reform news came to an end - I just physically couldn't do it all by myself to the depth I wanted to go, and lots of other places are skimming the surface.

Thanks for the kind words! :hug:

k+r

I was hoping I could bestow you with the coveted post number 69 but I think I might be a bit early :D

You are loved here. :hug:

Thank you very much for sharing this. Sorry for your misfortune; hopefully, 2009 will treat us all better.

and you know in your heart the truth about all this. No one deserves the treatment I have seen given here on DU of late.

I celebrate courage this week. YOUR courage in the face of bullies. :thumbsup:

And yes, I hope 2009 is much better for us all.

And libertyfirst gets 69! You knew there was a reason you stayed here!!

Thank you for your kind words :hug:

nt

:hug:

And staying strong :hug:

I agree wholeheartedly with your sigline :hug:

One of the great dynamics of this board is that we are not alone. Founded in the trough of a dismal stolen election after a pernicious conservative resurgence, people were thrilled to find a community of like-minded people, and take the edge off of some of the loneliness that life brings.

When our snuggly warm happiness is intruded upon, we react, but the reactions are often very different. Some take the hit and move on. Some rage and try to shout down the infuriation. Some actively try to get people banned. Some stalk. Some affect righteous privilege to misbehave or wallow in self-pity.

People are a mixed bag, and much of the friction in life comes from the continual human need to make things simple when they're not. Those who brook no dissent often also grant themselves immunity from laws of comportment to which they hold others, and the viciousness of peer pressure smothers all it dislikes.

We're headed into a very dangerous time, and there are many unpleasant issues that deserve to be brought up about this administration-to-be, but to the extremists, there shalt be no airing of grievances. For me, someone who deeply dislikes religion and the parochial mindset, this crushing intolerance bodes ill for things to come.

It's time to back off a bit and let people enjoy their moment, but that doesn't mean that every act of domineering ridicule needs to be tolerated either.

Your missive reminds me and many other of the respondents that we are not alone with our misgivings, and I hope that gives you the reassurance that you've given me.

We do indeed face many struggles.

It's funny with the economic issues we all laughed on this mountain. Appalachia is so poor we didn't even notice. The weekend after Lehman Bros and AIG went down, I couldn't have cared less. I saddled up my horse and rode down to Old 41 to wave at the Trail of Tears motorcycle riders as tens of thousands of them streamed by on their shiny Harleys.
My mare was kinda pissed but I was not concerned in the least because I can only go up from here, financially.

And that's kind of sad to say, that things are that bad.

But when it comes to people's rights, I get pretty upset. I know the marginalization of poverty all too well, but I can still marry whom I want (god knows I did it three times) and claim whom I wish to be my next of kin. I can't imagine the pain of having those choices taken out of my hands as an adult simply due to someone else's religion. Or because I'm not "just like him." Because his interpretation of his religion - in a nation supposedly separating church and state - is more valid than the Constitution. I know discrimination as a woman, but it's still not the same thing.

And I can't understand why some people here are so mean-spirited that they can't even let somebody vent about these things.

During the DNC, watching it with a male friend who is gay, we talked about the rhetoric and whether it meant anything. WE agreed it may not in the end, but we were happy to hear it anyway; it certainly wasn't going to come from the Other side. My friend actually teared up. But then I come here and it seems it really WAS just empty words after all. In more ways than one.

If that hurts me I know it hurts others who are GLBT far more deeply.

Been reading "Thurgood Marshall, American Revolutionary" by Juan Williams. The civil rights struggle is terrifying and thrilling and disgusting to read about all at the same time. But one thing I learned is that you don't give up, no matter how disheartening the bigots' behavior can be.

Keep on keeping on :hugs:

I thought I was gonna fall off the page or else get skewered. I'm glad that people can see they are loved and cared for and of value here even if they aren't jumping for joy over their party's successes.

Thanks :hug:

If I could recommend this a hundred times I would.

You get it. This post is not just filled with compassion but with true empathy. I wish I could hug you right now.

Peace.

in my longwinded manner!

And maybe it will help some less enlightened people understand what GLBT folks have been saying long before me.

Virtual Hugs, Baby! :hug:

werd!

werd indeed! :hug:

Well put.

and a hug for you too :hug:

Please tell your son I said "thank you" for his service. :patriot:

The climate of intolerance the fanboys and girls have created around here is pathetic.

He's the one who was Valedictorian of his graduating class this year! When I think of all the moms who lost their girls and boys over there I shudder.

I'm so proud of all six of my babes.

And let's hope the fanboys and girls realize they have been insufferable and they get a tad more humble

:patriot: :hug:

Love that treehugger there

:)

with some genuine compassion and understanding. Hard lessons will be coming in life for those here who can't care beyond their 'I got mine'.

I was really disappointed to see myopic circular flame wars, hurtful disrespect, and immature attacks routine in GDP. It really diminished this site for me relative to the Presidential win.

After the last 8 years of right wing parrots, the last thing fellow Democrats should encourage is lockstep approval when somebody rains on the parade. Freepers do that, not DUers.

DUers have had eight full years of questioning everything and become cynical of the government. They're not about to stop overnight.

That said, I'm ecstatic for the inauguration tomorrow and have nothing but best wishes for President Obama and the potential of what's to come for the US.

DU can always get crazy at election time, any time really.

There is a rude awakening coming for many. I recall one poster claiming they "didn't even know anyone who made less than $100,000 a year." I bet that's changed!

One thing I've learned in Appalachia is that you need each other. Community is so important here. Neighbors help neighbors, most of our socializing is free: potlucks, music jams, bonfires. Nobody goes hungry.

Because everybody knows everybody, you are going to see your enemies again, so you are careful about getting pissed and you learn to forgive and tolerate. Anonymous message boards often breed meanness precisely because no one can see you. But each poster represents a person, and our longtime DU posters deserve much more respect and consideration than they are getting lately. My .02!

:hug:

for giving mature voice to what so many of us have been thinking and feeling--
and perhaps saying elsewhere here and there, but just not as effectively or with the same class. Add me to the list of those who wish we could rec this a hundred times. It's a keeper in my bookmarks, for sure.

But I don't know if I'd call my hillbilly ass classy! Still, that made my day as I sit here in work jeans and a ginormous wool sweater!

Sometimes an objective person has to weigh in. Since I haven't been here in a long while, a quick overview of the site clued me in pretty fast.

I'm just glad some people maybe listened to a new voice when they were too damned mean and stubborn to listen to all the wise voices saying the same thing long before me.

:hug:

that too many have either lacked or not even bothered to try.

Interestingly enough, I am enthusiastic about today (I've had the TV going for days now watching all the pomp and circumstance). It's a new direction for our country - and even if I would have chosen a couple of different roads, I'm still looking forward to the journey.

That was the bad part with all this - not BO's choices so much - but the reactions, the one's who instantly read that my (or anyone else's complaints) meant that we somehow wish McCain/Palin was beginning their 1st/W's 3rd term. For folks so intent on celebrating, they've sure seemed in a foul mood lately.

I hopped on a thread last night and I was appalled at what people were saying. The hyperbole was coming from those opposed to any complaint and not the other way around.

Maybe some people feel guilty because they feel there's nothing they can do so they just want all the problems to "go away" and they get mean about it. I don't know.

GLBT on DU are not asking other posters to run out and fix the mess. They (and we who support them FULLY) just want to be heard, acknowledged, validated. That is not too much to ask from this board when they have given so much here, to BO's campaign and to the world at large.

:hug: Thanks BR_Parkway

Longtime no see :hi:

Thanks for the rec and :hug:

K & R

Thank you as well and I think you need a hug :hug:

heartfelt and poignant...bittersweet describes the past year well. Today I have hope that the world will change. Hope is a good thing.

Hope is about all we've got lol!

No, we have each other too.

Thanks for the kind words il_lilac. BTW, primroses and lilacs are my very favorite flowers :hug:

I'm thrilled about Obama and disgusted at Prop 8 because it affects me directly, and I'm disgusted at the Warren choice and I've been vocal about it.

It is possible to feel all those things at the same time, some here can't seem to wrap their head around that.

I am so sorry about Prop 8. To even consider Warren after his part in that...ugh.

You are so on the m oney there. Adults should be able to be as you are: able to see the good and the bad, appreciate what's right and fight like the dickens to fix what's wrong.

:hug:

And a hug :hug:

I feel better already just knowing he is now in the White House.

It feels safer, calmer, much more hopeful.

But we're still going to demand the change he promised!!!!

:hug:

It's really good to see you again :hug:

I pretty much agree w/ what you've said; it's why I don't really post here anymore. I hope you're doing well; got any requests for my show?:D

You better start posting again! I'll beat up the bullies for you - you know I'm good for it, too! Not that your studly self needs any help :)

And for your show, play "Hello Old Friend" by Clapton! :hi:

:hugs: :toast:

:hug:

"In Spite of Ourselves" by Iris DeMent and John Prine just came to mind:


"In spite of ourselves, we'll end up sittin' on a rainbow.

Against all odds, honey you're the big door prize.

We're gonna spite our noses right off of our faces.

There won't be nothin' but big old hearts dancin in our eyes."



And then you can play "Land of Confusion"

Oops I could think of a million...PM me the details about your new show. Dialup makes streaming kind of hard but I can try. :pals:

:patriot:

YOu are welcome and here's hoping now that Obama's our new president we can get down to work and get a nationwide dialogue going concerning equal rights for EVERYONE

:hug:

Hope you're back to stay. We need this kind of balance and posting. There were days (and weeks) I swore off this place because it had changed so very much. It's so good to read your post and have some of that old DU feel again.

Bittersweet is a good word for this past year.

:hug:

:hi:

What a sweet welcome back from your kind self.

DU used to drive me nuts sometimes but I missed it more than you can imagine when I couldn't get internet. I just can't believe some of the crap I've read since I got back. I can certainly understand why decent posters whould want to take a break for a while.

I'm glad you're still here and here's a big ol hug :hug:

saw this too late to rec but I can still kick.
It was a very simple thing to acknowledge another human beings pain, yet so many on this board refused to do it. Instead they inflicted more pain.
Obama has asked for our criticisms, he is an adult and can handel it.
We spent eight years in "free speech zones" and thankfully those days are over. We all supported and campaigned for Obama so our voices would be heard. :hug: :fistbump: :hug: