If I'm ever in trouble, I want Cheney to testify as an expert.

Prosecutor: But, we found a 1/2 lb of marijuana in the defendant's car.

Cheney: Obviously, someone who is possessing marijuana wouldn't be dumb enough to have marijuana in their possession. The fact you found it in his car proves he was not in possession of it.

Prosecutor: But, he actually was smoking a joint when the officer went up to his car.

Cheney: The people of Columbia believe in freedom. I can't believe you would stand there and demean these fine people for believing in freedom.

Prosecutor: But, the Defendant confessed to selling drugs to young children.

Cheney: I've seen your record. First, you say you oppose selling drugs to little children and then you turn around and say you are against it. We passed a major crime bill in the Senate last month and you weren't even there to vote on it. You have no credibility on this issue.

Prosecutor: But I'm not a member of the Senate.

Cheney: The American people want leaders who act, not those who make excuses.

Maybe Darth Cheney's got a new line of work once he's unemployed in Jan.
Those expert witnesses make damn good $$$ (not that Cheney needs it)

always had, CEO of Halliburton.

:-) :-) :-)