You live on the gulf coast if...

You have FEMA's number on your speed dialer.

You have more than 300 'C' and 'D' batteries in your
kitchen drawer.

Your pantry contains more than 20 cans of Spaghetti Os.

You are thinking of repainting your house to match the plywood
covering your windows.

When describing your house to a prospective buyer, you
say it has three bedrooms, two baths, and one safe
hallway.

Your SSN isn't a secret, it's written in Sharpie on
your arms.

You are on a first-name basis with the cashier at Home
Depot.

You are delighted to pay $3 for a gallon of regular
unleaded.

The road leading to your house has been declared a
'No-Wake' Zone.

You decide that your patio furniture looks better on
the bottom of the pool.

You own more than three large coolers.

You can wish that other people get hit by a hurricane
and not feel the least bit guilty about it.

You rationalize helping a friend board up by thinking
"It'll only take a gallon of gas to get there and
back"

You have 2-liter coke bottles and milk jugs filled
with water in your freezer

Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain;
today you can assemble a portable generator by
candlelight.

You catch a 13-pound redfish ---- in your driveway.

You can recite from memory whole portions of your
homeowner's insurance policy.

At cocktail parties, women are attracted to the guy
with the biggest chainsaw.

You have had tuna fish more than 5 days in a row.

There is a roll of tar paper in your garage.

You can rattle off the names of three or more
meteorologists who work at the Weather Channel and
every single newscaster and reporter at all of the
major stations in town.

Someone comes to your door to tell you they found your
roof.

Ice is a valid topic of conversation.

Your "drive-thru" meal consists of MRE's and bottled
water.

Relocating to South Dakota does not seem like such a
crazy idea.

You spend more time on your roof then in your living
room.

You've been laughed at over the phone by a roofer,
fence builder, or a tree worker.

You don't worry about relatives wanting to visit
during the summer.

Your child's first words are "hunker down" and you
didn't go to Ole Miss!

Having a tree in your living room does not necessarily
mean it's Christmas.

You know the difference between the "good side" of a
storm and the "bad side."

Your kids start school in August and finish in July.

You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the
air conditioning.

You get phone calls from family members saying they've
found bread at a store 6 miles away... and you hurry
to get there.

You wait in line for 45 minutes for a loaf of bread
and don't mind because at least you have bread.

A battery powered TV is considered a home
entertainment center.

some sad .. some hysterical. Thanks.

by a contractor just isn't very funny at all! The first time it happens, you just shrug. But after about the 5th time you start to look like x( !


It is so great how people are able to keep their senses of humor through things like this. Before Rita came ashore, there was a local sign on plywood that said "I wanted a MARGArita!", and I saw one on the Weather Channel in Florida that said "Wilma is mad- Fred left her for Barney!" :)