feeling pressure to choose

from all around, family, friends, society

I am a bi woman. I have been in relationships with men and women and never has it seemed to me that either way is the way I must go. Right now, I am not even looking for a relationship. I need some me time now. Yet still, people want a declaration of sorts. What are you? How do we know how to act around you if we don't know what you are? My being bi seems to confuse people, and lately I've been finding myself confused. Never before have I had to "pick a side". And I am still not going to. I am not gay nor straight, yet I am not in the middle. I am just me. And though I know the only way people can confuse you and disparage you is if you let them, yet here I am.....doubting myself, because I am doubted.

I want to add that I do have a good many friends who are very supportive. And that is wonderful. However, there are some key people in my life who simply do not grasp the idea of being gay, nevermind bi. I usually choose not to debate about it, it being my life, with these people. Eventually I end up cutting them out of my life for the most part. And I suppose that is where I feel the pressure. Knowing that with some people, it is all or nothing, black or white, up or down. It makes me sad to loose people in this manner, even though I know they are not the people I want to be around. I suppose I just long for a more open minded world. They say you have to be the change you want to see in the world, and I try to do that.

I think I just need to come here and vent and know that nobody here will leave my life because I am bi, maybe for other reasons, lol, but not that one.

Ask them, "Will you marry a black person? A white person? An Asian person? Pick a race now. You have to."

To someone who is down-the-middle of The Kinsey Scale, a gender is no different to you than a "race."

Being able to fall in love with someone of either gender is no different from someone who is able to fall in love with someone of more than one race.

thank you.

you live your life. Maybe you need to be a little more assertive about it being your own business. If they don't know how to act around you they should try like acting like friends and be supportive of you at a time like this.

I say, get out and meet some new people you can be friends with who won't give you a hard time. Plenty of people take time off to figure things out and even enjoy themselves while they do. Why shouldn't you?

...it isn't a question of choice, over a question of being myself! And just leave it at that.

Fuck them all. It's absolutely none of their business how you live. Do these people think life is too easy, that they have to go around making trouble for others? Let them deal with their own lives rather than nosing in on yours. Simply put, they're crossing a line, and if they can't get that then you're absolutely right to either exclude them or bark them down.

((Hugs.))