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Gay Couples Not Allowed At Rhode Island Cemetery

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TechBear_Seattle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:19 AM
Original message
Gay Couples Not Allowed At Rhode Island Cemetery
Words can not describe my disgust at this situation.

Cranston, Rhode Island) A walk through St. Ann's Cemetery in Cranston, Rhode Island is walk through people's lives - the markers tell the stories of 'loving fathers', 'caring wives' and 'devoted couples'.

But not if those couples happen to be gay, as Rick Paolino discovered when he made arrangements for the crypt marker for his late husband Justin.

The Paolino's were married in Massachusetts. Justin, a bus monitor for the West Warwick School Department, died unexpectedly last month at home.

He was burried at St. Ann's. When Rick went to order the inscription on the crypt cemetery officials turned him down when he said he wanted the marker to indicate he was Justin's husband.

They also turned down "spouse" and finally "beloved".

"I just want this to be recognized," Paolino told WJAR in Providence. "In two or three hundred years when that name is there, I want someone to know that this person loved this person."


The article continues at http://www.365gay.com/Newscon06/03/032206tomb.htm

The excuse given is that the cemetary is run by the Roman Catholic Diocese of Providence, and allowing such an inscription would, somehow, "sanction" equal marriage.
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Blust8 Donating Member (11 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:22 AM
Response to Original message
1. Even in Blue States
An incredible amount of discrimination takes place. This just shows that it isn't just about the "Sanctity of marriage" with right wingers, it's about criminalizing and demonizing homosexuality--no matter who it hurts. This makes me sick.
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KyndCulture Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:22 AM
Response to Original message
2. So very sad... nt
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:25 AM
Response to Original message
3. "Till death do they part"
Seems like they did a fine job of maintaining the sanctity of marriage. I stopped going to Mass because every Sunday it was the same thing coming from the pulpit, pure unadulterated hatred of people not in attendance.
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Marnieworld Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:26 AM
Response to Original message
4. It would have been nice if this was made clear to him before his husband
was buried there. They should make their views and restrictions known up front at the point of sale and not after the commitment has been made.

Catholic cemeteries make exceptions at will all of the time. My sister committed suicide but she was buried in a Catholic plot regardless. This is deliberate hateful discrimination. They can't stop people from loving each other so they stop it from being acknowledged. So sick to do to people suffering a loss.
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:28 AM
Response to Reply #4
7. And make it clear truthfully
Have a big old sign outside the cemetery. WE HATE GAYS AND THERE WILL BE NO ENGRAVING INSINUATING THAT LOVE WAS INVOLVED IN ANY SUCH RELATIONSHIP.
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Ian David Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:26 AM
Response to Original message
5. We won't tell them who can be buried, if they can't tell us who to marry
I think that should be the deal.

They can discriminate as much as they want, as soon as they learn that the wall between church and state works BOTH ways.
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riona Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:32 AM
Response to Reply #5
8. works for me
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Nicholas D Wolfwood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:27 AM
Response to Original message
6. I knew it was Catholic before I even read it.
I'm glad I'm not one of them anymore.
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donco6 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:34 AM
Response to Original message
9. I had trouble getting a plot next to my husband.
This is a small city cemetery in the Colorado mountains where my partner grew up. They allow "family members" to purchase plots, but since I'm not technically a "family member" they were balking (we've been together for 9 years now.)

But you know, my partners parents - crusty old ranchers that they are - they just absolutely came unglued at the cemetery people. Threatened a lawsuit, hired a lawyer, sent an official letter - WOW! The cemetery finally backed off.

I never thought about the inscription stuff. Wonder if that will be a problem . . .
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JudyM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 01:57 PM
Response to Reply #9
14. How fortunate you are that your partner's parents are so supportive.
I'm proud of them and I don't even know them!
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donco6 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 02:00 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. They are so incredibly great, I can't tell you.
They send me Christmas cards, little notes now and then. And these are not sophisticated people - just farmer/rancher types who you wouldn't be able to distiguish from "American Gothic". But just sweet as hell, and feisty if you get them riled up.
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Strong Atheist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:58 AM
Response to Original message
10. What would Jesus say? More toleration... nt.
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Joey Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 01:05 PM
Response to Original message
11. This is why I'm a FORMER Catholic n.t
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Pacifist Patriot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 01:18 PM
Response to Original message
12. How very sad.
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phusion Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 01:21 PM
Response to Original message
13. I'm just thinking of V for Vendetta
How long till this country is like that?

:(
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williesgirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 03:25 PM
Response to Original message
16. Protect abusive priests, but no love in marriage! Makes me sorry I was
raised Catholic. I stopped attending Mass/supporting the Church when my daughter was 7 and in CCD (religious classes for kids attending public schools). She was very sick and missed a lot of school and CCD. One Sunday she could attend she came out crying and very upset. Seems the CCD teacher scolded her for her poor attendance and strongly suggested she give up her spot so some "good Catholic kid" could take her place.

I went ballastic! Gave them all a piece of my mind. Stopped the monthly checks and all. I still believe in God and love Him, but no longer believe the Catholic Church is his spokesperson here on Earth.

Their cruelty continues and knows no bounds.
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sui generis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 05:22 PM
Response to Original message
17. tax the fucking church. It is so overdue
they take our money by not paying taxes, and buy land that they can discriminate against us with.

You know what. Every gay business in Rhode Island should have a sign that says "Roman Catholics not served here".

What's keeping us from doing that? What's keeping "good catholics" from going along with it, nudge nudge, wink wink.
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MountainLaurel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 08:34 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. What Sui said.
:applause:
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GOPNotForMe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 08:56 PM
Response to Original message
19. Further fueling my hostility toward religion.
They can't keep their mouths shut about how awful gays are, well then I won't be able to keep my mouth shut about how silly their beliefs are.
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