Blend two softened bricks of cream cheese with a packet of Old El Paso taco seasoning and spread the mixture in a casserole dish (a 2 qt (rectangular) Pyrex baking dish works fine).
Chop up 2-3 red jalapeño peppers and sprinkle them across the top.
Optional: chop up a couple of stalks of organic celery and throw across the top.
Chop up about 1/2 or more head of iceburg (other if you prefer, but you want some crunch) lettuce and spread.
Dice two good tomatos (if you can't find good tomatos, don't bother) and spread.
Grate about 3 ounces of good cheddar cheese (more or less to your liking) and ... spread.
Serve with chips that can stand up to the dip and not break in it.
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