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The empressof all Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-08-08 12:23 PM
Original message
Dogs, Food and Whine.......
So yesterday I finally got a chance to use the two prepared pie crusts I had in the fridge. I had taken them out of the freezer and knew that I was quickly approaching the do or throw out point with them. I haven't been cooking much lately so I was all psyched up to use those creative juices in creating a masterpiece. I've been thinking about this Chocolate, coconut, pecan pie for weeks now.


I compiled all the ingredients and realized I didn't have enough Karo syrup to make the two pies I planned. I checked the eggs and realized the "HUSBAND" bought medium eggs when he went to the store a few days ago. (Who does that? Right?) Knowing that I would have to adapt my traditional pecan pie recipe, I got the calculator out and started figuring. I got bored with that and just threw caution to the wind and used 8 eggs instead of 6 and melted extra brown sugar with the butter and what Karo I had to use as the sweetener.

I decided I wanted a chewier pie so I didn't toast the coconut and I used TJ's roasted salted pecans because I wasn't going for a really sweet pie. I used dark chocolate chips. It was perfection.

So I baked the pies and they looked great. As I was taking them out of the oven I must have hit one of the burners on my stove. Of course it was the one that was directly under my One Shot Plastic coffee pot that was sitting there because I just cleaned it. I ran to check the DU and my coffee pot burned. Luckily, I didn't have to call the fire department but melty burning plastic sure smells bad and makes an entirely obscene amount of smoke. YUCK. Good thing it wasn't too cold because I had to have all the windows open most of the day to get rid of the stink.

Anyway after the pies cooled I wrapped one in plastic wrap and aluminum foil to freeze for Thanksgiving and waited until the "HUSBAND" came home to try the other one. After dinner he cut himself a huge piece and declared it Perfect. For a moment I achieved what a woman in the 1950's would have thought to have been Good Housekeepings version of Wifely Nirvana. It had been a crappy week but for that moment all was good. Then, as you can already guess, I heard the crash, bang and shatter of glass. We ran across the house but it was too late. The dogs had been in cahoots and the big one had succeeded in getting the pie. (Like who leaves a pie on the edge of a counter anyway? Right?---Wasn't Me) Good thing the Pyrex Pie Plate shattered in clean pieces so we were confident they hadn't ingested any glass but we looked at each other and knew what we had to do. They had already ingested Chocolate. After a quick call to the Emergency Vet we got out the Peroxide took them outside and did what we had to do. It wasn't pleasant for any of us.

So I salvaged one "Perfect" Pie for Thanksgiving and I have a clean kitchen floor. "HUSBAND" has been educated about the folly that is medium sized eggs and the challenges of cleaning sticky sugar based foods off of a linoleum floor. The dogs were schooled on consequences although I don't think it will stop them from being dogs in the future. And, I had a moment of secret pleasure when the big one vomited all over my "HUSBANDS" new sneakers.
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Longhorn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-08-08 12:39 PM
Response to Original message
1. I can't tell you how much food we've lost to our dogs
and none of it had been so painstakingly prepared as your pie! Our two tall dogs can reach anything on the counter so some things have to go on top of the refrigerator to be safe! I'm glad everything is okay and everyone learned their lessons! ;)
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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-08-08 09:57 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. Dogs .....
.... Ours are known lovingly as "Big" (a German Shepard) and "Little" (a way-too-smart-for-anyone's-good Border Collie).

Little has never been a beggar. Her bad habit is laying on beds and making hair nests.

Big, on the other hand, is a drooling tongue with feet. She's tall enough that much of the kitchen is within mouth range.

Her most annoying yet endearing habit is at the end of every meal we eat. She walks up silently behind Sparkly, puts her big snout through the crook pf her arm, and pushes slowly forward. As if we might not notice.
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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-08-08 09:52 PM
Response to Original message
2. That story should be a chapter in a book!
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eridani Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Nov-09-08 05:13 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. Yep! A veritable reincarnation of Erma Bombeck
Hey, have you ever seen them together?
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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Nov-09-08 08:46 AM
Response to Reply #4
5. She was great!
I read a lot of her stuff. I loved her.
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Beacool Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-11-08 01:10 AM
Response to Original message
6. That was way too entertaining!!!
You should send it to some cooking magazine, it's very well written.

It also reminds me of the year my brother threw a birthday party for his wife and had ordered a huge cake. They had a dog that was always stealing food. She managed to get a hold of the cake and ate half of it and ended up.......well, sick as a dog.

:7
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Catshrink Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-22-08 10:25 PM
Response to Original message
7. OMG! What a story!
Sorry about your pie.

The nice thing about Doxies is that they can't reach the counter. Unfortunately, they can get into the garbage. I came home from work one day last week to find egg shells all over the house. I guess that was the tastiest treat in the garbage can. Naughty boys!
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