How to Roast a Pig

I found this on Penzey's website -- too much work for me!

http://www.penzeys.com/cgi-bin/penzeys/recipes/r-penzeysroastapig.html

A lady I worked with had a a huge pig roast complete with a beer truck on the side. It was always interesting. :)

My husband's department use to have a pig roast every summer. So one night, he and a half-dozen beer guzzling folks brought this pig to our house to prepare it for the roast. It involved almost as much garlic as beer. Picture mucho beer bottles and the dead pig, sliding around the table.

Meanwhile, I have a group of Democrats in the living room, drawing up the plans for the annual Democratic booth at the county fair. It was a very hot sultry August night, in NW Ohio (sans A/C). We'll Dems are very tolerant, but the smell of the garlic, mixed with the smell of the dead pig got just a bit much, so we brought out fans and put them in the doorways blowing back into the kitchen. Hopeless!

Then about 2am, we head out to the park, about 20 miles away. At the time we had a motor home, so Jim made up the bed in the back and covered it with piles of black garbage bags taped together with duct tape. The guys loaded the pig and left in their own cars, while Jim and I go in the motor home, reeking with the most god-awful smell.

Like I said, it's 2am and since I absolutely refused to ride in the back holding onto the pig, so it wouldn't slide off the plastic, Jim is driving VERY slowly through downtown, on the way to the highway. I guess the slow driving (and probably the Democratic bumper sticker), looked suspicious, so the next thing you know, blue lights are flashing. We very carefully pull over and the cop knocks on the door. I open the door and almost knock him over with the smell. Which BTW, fortunately masked the odor of the beer.

So there we sit, while the cop takes his flashlight and walks down the aisle to the back of the motor home. Then he sees the heap of black plastic bags and says, "What's this?" Jim says, "Just a pig, ossifer."

So he pulls off the plastic and viola, it was a pig, ossifer. Needless to say we felt compelled to invite him to come to the official roasting of the pig later that day.

Mary

That's one of the funniest stories I've seen a good while! Thanks for sharing it. :hi:

My spouse left out one of the more harder tasks of the evening.

That was when we got to the area which we were going to roast the pig we had to put it on a spit. So we could cook it the rest of the morning and day. Too much beer, too much laughing and the time of the morning (or late night)for a bunch of dummies along with suggestions of where to place the spit ended up taking another hour.

The pig was cooked, nobody got sick - from the pig - , and it was a good event.

The best pig roast was a following year.

It was a whole hog, split. The cooker was a square assembly of corrugated tin held together with angle iron. It had a grill mounted about 3 feet from the ground and a tin cover. We used charcoal placed in two 4 inch wide and 4 feet long trays mounted about 4 inches off the ground. The drippings from the hog fell on the ground.

10 pounds of charcoal, 5 hours, a goodly amount of keg beer and that pig was done and tasted great. No dressing the pig or any thing else was used. The fat of the hog was all the necessary flavoring.

I have also cooked pig in a pit - no good stories just good pig.

Later,
Jim. spouse of Mary

PS

Got some good home made wine stories.

Some warm stories .. some funny ... like the time I was about 11 and got into some 'green' (unaged, rough, raw) wine.

Can you say 'sick'? :)

Once when Jim made potato wine in the basement. The house was built in 1858 and the basement was basically a stone dungeon. I never knew what he was doing down there. Anyway I opened the basement door (which was in the family room) and a million gnats immediately took up residence in the family quarters.

Another time I was heading off to my book discussion group, where we were going to discuss Vance Packard's "The Status Seekers". One of the things he talked about in the book was that the nouveau rich insist on wall-to-wall carpet (this was mid-70s) and the old rich preferred oriental carpet.

So as I'm leaving, I walk through the dining room. Here's the scene I observe. The floors are painted with porch paint and we have an old oriental, which we got at an auction for a song, because one corner was all torn up, but I put a buffet over it. However, there was another corner that our dog took a fancy too, pre-housebreaking. Another corner is in front of our old iron radiator.

There crouched on the "old rich" oriental carpet, the master of the manor........barefooted, jockey shorts, a very tattered old college football jersey and a fishing hat sliding off the back of his head. He had a cigar clenched in his teeth, just waiting for me to get out of the house, so he could light it.

Between him and the radiator, two shiny aluminum garbage cans with big inflated plastic bags, with a thermometer, tubes and a Mason jar, testing a huge batch of cherry wine.

Needless to say, Vance Packard had not analyzed that scenario.

Mary

Cigars and jockey shorts. I call that formal attire. Who needs nouveau rich?

And crazy, hairbrained schemes .... like cherry wine in the dining room????? You go! :hi:

Roast a whole hog over a grill, no rotisserie, but maybe one of those large cages/baskets so you can turn it. Usually a smallish one, 60-70 lbs.

Cook it nice an slow for 4-6 hours. Of course, this is a fine time to drink too much and tell stories.

Everybody gather round the bbq and eat the meat right off the bone. And you can dip it in the vinegar and red pepper sauce or not. No need for plates or anything, though they are there if you want them. ;-)

I've always loved these. :D

I remember in high school the brick-laying class built a bbq pit expressly for this purpose.

white bbq sauce? The first place I ever had was in Kinston. Had it again when I lived in Durham.

as a matter of fact. :D :hi:

Yes, we make vinegar-based sauce here. :9 And you can never have too much hot peppers for me!

I haven't made it in years ..... since I left Durham, actually ... and that was in 1973! I've told my sons about it (they're familiar with West Tennessee BBQ ... and dry ribs ... Memphis style stuff), but have yet to make it for them.

This is like the sauces I am most familiar with:

Personally, I would omit the sugar and add more pepper flakes.


1 cup white vinegar
1 cup cider vinegar
1 tablespoon sugar
1 tablespoon red pepper flakes
1 tablespoon tabasco sauce
salt and fresh cracked black pepper -- to taste

Preparation:
Just mix them up together and use.

From: "The Thrill Of The Grill"
Posted By: BBQ Mailing List
Post Date: April 97

http://www.pepperfool.com/recipes/bbq/east_3.html

http://www.lacajachina.com/



It's supposed to be awesome, I've seen it on the foodnetwork several times. I want to get one!

Power Tools! :)

I'm sorry to interrupt this wanton pig-roasting-fest, but I'd just like to say that I'm a (semi-)vegetarian, and you guys are a terrible influence on H2S. Why just tonight, I got him to eat both broccoli AND cauliflower. Yes, both in one night. Sure, it might have involved about a cup of EVOO, and a glass of Zin, but still...

And now I find out that my hard-fought battles are for naught. All the time I'm basking in my sense of accomplishment hearing him heap effusive praise on my vegetables with comments like, "It's nearly edible" and "I really couldn't eat another bite of it," I'm unaware that he's secretly communing with you guys here, discussing roasting animals! And asking for recipes for sauces to accompany said roasted animals!

It's enough to make me want to eat another chocolate bar, smoke a cigarette or refill my wine glass. Do you people have some problem with self-control or something? I mean, SOME of us are self-disciplined around here. (Okay, who took my lighter?)

If I ever see a pig coming into my house (and I don't mean his oldest son), I will be back to flog you all with a stalk of celery.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

:rofl: Are you guys like trying to keep kosher or something? :D

Sparkly, I swear I'm an equal opportunity ominivore. I love my veggies as much as my pork.

But watch her attack one of these:


I'm **much** more sane and rational. (You believe that, right?)

I eat alla this stuff ......





I tolerate this stuff .....




**Some** people are tolerant of all tastes :)