DailyOM: "Fear of Losing What We Have -- Seeing Beyond Fearful Delusions"

Fear of Losing What We Have
Seeing Beyond Fearful Delusions
August 25, 2009

One of humanity’s biggest fears is losing what we have. It is healthy when fear of loss helps us take steps to protect what we have worked hard to attain, but it is unhealthy to continue to fear something we can do nothing about. We need to remember that focusing our energy on fear can actually create what scares us, and holding tightly to what we have keeps us from participating in the universal flow of abundance and instead creates stagnation. Since we can only really control our thoughts and our responses, gaining proper perspective may be key to conquering such fears.

The letters of the word "fear" can be used to stand for "False Evidence Appearing Real." Fears of being separated from something or someone we feel we need for our security or happiness comes from a delusion—a distorted way of understanding ourselves and the world around us. When we understand that possessions are only representations of the energy at work in our lives, we can shift our attention to the right and proper place. We can stop fearing loss of money or success because when we understand how it is created, we can always create more. We can stop fearing loss of possessions when we realize that they are not the source of our joy or well-being but only icing on our cakes. And when we understand the energy of love, we need not hold anyone too close for fear of losing them for we know that love does not diminish when it is given or shared but expands beyond boundaries of time or space.

By focusing our light on our fears, they are revealed as mere shadows that disappear in the presence of mind and spirit. We can choose instead to direct our thoughts and creative power toward things of true value—love, abundance, peace, passion, and joy. These are energies that are always available to us when we place ourselves confidently in the universal flow of abundance.

http://www.dailyom.com/articles/2009/19963.html

I get the Daily OM in my email, and love just about every one of them, but one line in this writing especially put me in fear and I had to close it or my mind would have just spun with it out of control. "...focusing our energy on fear can actually create what scares us". That scares me to death and I have get away from it. I do not want to think that I could kill my father for being more than a little in fear due to his worsening heart condition, which is what was on my mind when I received this "Daily OM".

There is only so far that I can stand to go with the manifestation idea before I worry that living is just too difficult and tricky and I will never be able to think properly enough to please the fracking Universe so why try? Damned no matter what. So I had to focus off this reading quickly.

That being said, fear eats our lives completely. I absolutely agree with that. And I am much better not focusing on the things I cannot control and am much happier when I make a concerted effort to direct my mind elsewhere.

I guess I threw that out just in case I am not the only oddball that got scared by a meditation on letting go of fear, LOL!

as soon as I realize that I'm doing it, I say "cancel, cancel", or I say a positive affirmation. In your case, I'd say something like "My father is healthy and happy. (This or something better for the highet good of all involved.)" This is supposed to tell the Universe that you weren't "placing an order" by that thought, if that makes sense. I then try to focus on something else -- maybe smell something good, taste something, put on nice music, etc. (Using the senses can help to change your focus.)

Maybe doing this will make you a little less fearful of your thoughts.

:hug:

It just seems to me that manifestation, when reaches a point that it produces a need for all my thoughts to be perfect all the time, or else I need to obsessively correct them or I can completely doom my life; will produce just terrible mental health. I am more than a little obsessive-compulsive in my thinking (if I dared see a shrink they would probably try to medicate me into land of the zombies), and it seems like manifestation can be taken to the point to where we fear our every thought and that it is not always mentally healthy to go down that road in my way of thinking.

I hope I don't seem unspiritual to people but it feels like looking at manifestation in the way it is often described would contribute to unhealthy obsessions. The idea that the Universe is nothing but a glob of power that we can accidentally use to do terrible, awful things that we never wanted in any way. In fact, that the mindless power blob will do them specifically because we don't want them to occur, doesn't provide me hope or love or any kind of higher level connection.

And as many times in my much younger years that I have specifically wished I were dead, how can I be sitting here in healthy middle-age? I guess I just have some concerns (not a concern troll though, LOL). I hope you won't think I am directing it at you in any way IHAD, you're great, this is just stuff bubbling up in my mind. :pals:

things. I certainly don't take anything that you've said as personal, especially since it was said with civility. Actually, I appreciate your starting the conversation! These are really imporant concerns to be discussing.

Hopefully some other people will chime in. Otherwise, I'll respond in more detail this evening. :)

:hug:

:P I am more than a little ocd so I know where you are coming from. I think positive thinking is *helpful* but that thinking negative thoughts are not the end of the world or I would be long dead!!!

I do work at the worst yukkiest thoughts breathing light into my mind and body there they feel most focused to heal any imbalance or emotional/mental charge left over from something else that is making that thought worse for a couple or three breathes. I like to imagine a giant red VOID rubber stamp that I smack down the thought with to neutralize the bad vibe. I also tell my guides I really don't want that to happen so do what you can to help it just in case.

Mainly I focus on leaving open a mental crack that yeah bad things can happen but maybe, just maybe, really good wonderful things can. Good stuff can be like hamsters squeezing into the tinyiest spots you wouldn't think the little critter can fit.

manifestation, as they say, has many, to us, as "manifestors", unknown elements at play. I have now for at least a good year tried to understand and experiment with it.

What I think, though, is that we can not for example ask for a house for your family, and then be in dispute with all involved about it, including yourself. Furthermore, what I used to do is, start with all the "what-if", negative and positive scenarios, the negative ones are based on fear. It does not help to fret over something that has not happened, why give rise to a negative possible outcome out of numerous outcomes. Likewise, the positive ones are just that, a possibility. Neither does it help to obsess as you say. It has not happened yet. What matters is the now, and the actions we take now, as best we can, at any given moment, towards the outcome we would like.

What made sense to me was something called "abundance meditation", which I downloaded for free. I think I posted it here before.
In any event, it is a visualization exercise about a seed, a seed (your wishes) you hold in your hand, and then ask a bird to take and plant it in the most suitable place in the universe. You have to let go of your seed and entrust it to the bird and universe, where there are many elements, i.e. others wishes and dreams. In time, the seed will sprout and grow. Just like in nature, there will be people who will contaminate the soil or earth with pollution, and then there will be those, who see the beauty of, or will likewise benefit from seeing the seed grow.

In a sense, perhaps we are all responsible for each others dreams and happiness because we are so inter-connected, whether we know it or not. That is why I like the Buddhist teachings of having to work on myself for the happiness of all.

Fear is something that is very difficult to deal with. Much love and light to you for your ill father, get the red out.


:grouphug:

I like the bird planting the seed. Very sweet imagery. Very positive and trusting.

Thank you!

I had an experience with fear a few years ago when I started on the path and that was the problem that first came up - that I was a scaredy-cat and worrywart. I remember the acronym in this article was one of the first things I learned and it resonated so strongly that I practiced it whenever the negative thinking popped into my head.

One day, I realized that I felt really great most of the time. I was sitting on my couch, patting myself on the back, when believe it or not, a tall dark cloudy mass came through my front door and sat right beside me. I knew who it was after reading a lot of Seth, that this was a projection from my mind of fear.

I just sat there with it for a few seconds when it rose up again. I asked it why was it leaving and I heard distinctly, "You don't need me anymore." I'm goose-bumping right now. Whoa! Need? This was the first time that I understood fear as a need that can be shed. Not that I don't get afraid and worry, but it certainly doesn't last long when using "False Evidence Appearing Real."