So..umm...yeah. Things are not going the way I thought.

I'm a little lost. I really am not trying to complain as such, it's just that...well, we are back in the red in a bad way again. The job that paid so well hubby lost earlier this year, he got back--what was it-about beginning of August I believe. However, they weren't paying him the base pay he was getting before, and the tips were now virtually non-existent. Then, about 2 weeks ago, he tried to mediate a problem and help a fellow worker out (a bartender who had a customer break a valued necklace; he was bringing it back to her) and some other girl started cussing him out-so he defended himself,and got summarily fired for it. (The manager literally said he thought he could replace a dj easier than a waitress. yep. Not like they spent 3 months trying to replace husband the first time, which is why they called him back in the first place).--Sorry about the long explanation,but anyway---The whole reason I believe he got the job back was that he was visualizing it a la The Secret. He was positive and proactive an all. I thought I was being so also.
So, what the hell? I will admit that on the Aries full moon we both had a very strong bout of negativity (which is also when the thing happened that got him fired, and he's an Aries); but I have to admit it felt like a cleansing; I had a good cry after we yelled a bit, and released all that emotion. We both felt better after that..then WHAM.
I went back to work last week and to my chagrin (I can't believe I'm admitting this to all of you) I made about $40 every night I worked. The only redeeming factor is that it's tax free I guess.
Several times lately I've caught myself asking what did I do wrong in my intentions; how did I get here? Am I really that bad at this manifestation thing? Am I really that negative? I enjoy what I do, so does husband..and he's great at his job. It just seems ppl here are not ready to understand him.
Well, any ideas as to a better way to approach this? We are in limbo at the moment..a couple of things may pan out for him this week,but we won't know until Wed. at least. There's another big opportunity coming,but not until mid-Nov. and we have to, like, feed ourselves and have electricity until then. I am seriously trying not to get down and pessimistic about it, but frankly, I'm scared. We are skating on cracking ice.
Any insight into what it is evident I am not seeing about this situation would be greatly welcomed.

:hug: :hug:

I don't have any words of wisdom for you - having been much less than successful myself in the manifestation department - but I just wanted to send you some hugs and some hope.

O8)

We can use all we can get. Thanks so much.:hug:

(1) Don't blame yourself for things you can't control. People choose to pay for goods and services. That means someone else's free will is in play regardless of whether you provide those goods and services directly or through an employer. Consider that perhaps your present circumstances are not entirely the result of your intentions.

(2) You seem to have concluded that either you are doing something wrong, that you are bad at manifesting or that you are too negative. That in and of itself undermines your best intentions. Remember that you cannot control the timing in which things are manifested. I suspect that everything that you truly need will be provided - though perhaps not in the manner or timing which you expect. Personally, I find it is more effective to focus on a desired outcome as opposed to my understanding of how that outcome ought to be achieved.

:grouphug:

..and I believe husband has been saying the latter to me in his own way.
It's just hard to stop over-analyizing, ya know?
Thanks so much,I will make a concerted effort to let it go and focus on what I want only.

you fall out of synch it helps to get a refresher...sometimes the second, or the third or the fourth time around, something you missed the other times hits you, or it might help you realize where you are going wrong. Another thing to remember is the wording of our request can be important, if you ask for something or visualize something, but are also saying or visualizing a negativity or "doubt" of any kind around it, the doubt indicates you aren't convinced or aren't truly seeing it.

It's hard to help out in this situation, because we all have to dig deep to figure out what it is that we are missing or don't "see". It's different for everybody and very personal. Try making yourself some kind of visualization board and gratitude is huge. Look at what you are doing right, where your strength lies and give yourself some positive reinforcement...you can build on that.

Remember that positive thoughts are more powerful.

Often when I lack the belief, I acknowledge that doubt in my request. I do not know tho if this only amplifies the doubt or if I am making it easier to get "around" that doubt. I does help me to tune in on the doubt, but I am wondering if it just makes it more prevelant.


Just wonderin'

Cat In Seattle

books & there are many things that can and will go wrong in our lives, even while we do our best and practice The Secret...but we have a choice in our perspective and how we look at the things in our lives. If we focus on the good in all situations, that good grows. We cannot blame ourselves when we think we are not successful, or if we get sick, but when we focus on the good and have gratitude for that good, it will grow.

It's like the girl that wakes up in the morning and is late for work, rushing around, she bangs into something and bruises her leg and gets a run in her stocking and it all just snowballs. We can let the bad grow or the good, choose the good. ;)

Hey, I'm no master at this, just finding my way thru the dark, but I know how when my attitude is good and I look for the best, I very often find it. I think we often practice The Secret without realizing how we really do create our own reality.

remind of the part of "The Secret" when James Ray talks about the Universe says, 'your wish is my command'. He holds his hand up and shows a small growth coming upwards towards it, and someone says, see I knew this wasn't working, and it just wilts the small growth. Your wish is my command. Even if it hasn't manifested on the 'physical' plane yet, doesn't mean there isn't something growing just beneath the surface.

as my ability to manifest is severely curtailed at the moment it seems, but--is it possible that you're asking for the wrong things? That's the only reason I can come up with that the manifestation project isn't working for me...I'm either asking for the wrong things or asking for them in the wrong way, I think. Maybe think bigger, or less specific? Satisfying opportunities instead of "moneyed" opportunities? But then again, what do I know?

There's always tomorrow. (Big opportunities for manifesting.)

..almost to the point of over-analyzing it I think! (slight chuckle here). I am definately thinking that either I really asked for the wrong thing, or I wasn't remembering my grateful list. More likely the latter probably..and it would probably be best to be less specific at the moment too..focusing more on the result than anything else.

Yes, definately focusing a bit tommorrow. That's part of the reason I felt compelled to reach out toninght and discuss this with all of you.

Hope you're doing better dear...it's been a rough few months for both of us it seems.
:hug:

... as someone who has live "on the edge" for most of my adult life, I can tell you that, even when the need is real and seems like there is *no* way that it not be answered, it won't be. Things like: I just KNOW it cannot happen. My kids will be hungry tonight if I don't find SOMETHING to feed them ~ but then they go hungry anyway (actually happened to me when I just KNEW God would not allow such a thing). It is a reasonable request, YOU did not do anything to cause their hunger, and you are working your butt off, you are doing all the "right" things, you had faith and even a confidence that it WILL happen you will get enough food for the day. But it never happens. You wonder WTF? :wtf:

Years later, your child tells you how appreciative they are for every day he has a home and food on the table because he remembers the days as I described. THEN you know that there WAS a reason that things did not work out at the time, it is just that God's time and your time is not the same.

I am just saying here Dear that negativity is not the whole thing and that God's time is something TO have faith in, even if it is not our time and you are doing all the "right" things. You are a very special young woman and I sense that much of your wisdom is because, this is not the first time you have had hard times. Maybe it will gall you to say this (it usually galls me when loved ones tell me this, lol), and it does not pay the heat bill, but it is part of your exceptional beauty and wisdom you have because of those times. You have a deep understanding that many your age do not have and this is rare and gorgeous.

My 2 cents

Love,
Cat In Seattle

you're making me cry! Thanks so much for your kind words and vote of confidence.

I know instinctively that you are right about things happening in their own time, and I actually am not "panicking" as such, but husband is just not very positive today..he's a workaholic, and it is freaking him out that he doesn't have a job right now. I am trying my best to have faith and trust that things happen for a reason..I will be honest. He is being tested far harder than I am this year. Looking from the outside in, any person would think that I should have left him by now. I know that other's opinions do not matter, but the way I am involved and am having to function in the nightlife of this town, it could become a problem.
Also, I know that these times are as you said..often here to give me or others near me wisdom..I must be frank: I feel like I have "paid my dues" as it were. The fact that this kind of situation keeps repeating must be an indicator that I have not learned the lesson contained within yet-I'm just having a really hard time figuring out what on earth that could be! Or, maybe something husband has to learn; but his life has been so hard up to this point and he is such a wonderful soul; I feel as if he deserves a break too. Eh, not that I know best,but ?
I really believe something will give by the end of the week. Actually, the opportunity he is probably about to be given come next month will be ideal if it pans out, and I can understand that Universe felt the need to free him up for that situation. I also got exactly what I asked for..a chance to go back to work.
We've just been behind so often in spurts lately..it does get very discouraging. I don't want to lose more because I can't pay for what I need to, even if it's only temporary. People are going to run out of patience with us very soon.
I guess what I'm saying is that I do believe strongly in the Universe having its' own good time for things..but damn, it sure is pushing it down to the wire. My faith/trust is being tested to almost the limit. That,as you know,can be a scary proposition.
I must need to be very wise! Haha.
Thank you again ...I will be remembering your words for the rest of the week and longer.

things will soon turn around for you.

I will say this: It has been my experience that often times when I am having a period of great spiritual insight or growth that I am 'presented with' some of my greatest tests. The spirit is sometimes stretched so that it can grow- if you know what I mean.

Perhaps this is what is going on. I do think you should watch the Secret again as mentioned up thread.\

Please, let us know day-to-day how things are going.:hug:

and thanks for your words. Cat said about the same thing,and I am sure that this is true...it's just kinda frustrating! As I said to her, I must be growing a LOT! Ha ha. I am excited to see what will be happening after this...but this time is always scary for me. We've had experiences of losing major amounts of valued posessions (emotionally as well as monetarily) because of not being able to pay for something, so it's a scenario of having been burned before that causes my fear.

MY oldest brother belongs to the Church of Christ Science, and they seem to believe "The Secret", and it has been the source of endless arguments between my brother and I. I think it is nonsense and very bad. Why? Because it is a way of blaming people for their own problems and denying anyone compassion. My brother actually said that his father-in-law got cancer because of his negativity. Well guess what, now their minister also has cancer. And my brother who believes all this stuff hook, line and sinker is a crack-head homeless guy who does not support his two wonderful daughters. But he is ALWAYS thinking positive and hates to be around negativity. We have tired to help him endlessly (probably just enabling him) but he brings so much negativity into our lives, but he is so passive aggressive about it because he always has to tell himself he is being positive. (I agree with Chrissie Hynde "If you're mad, get mad!" I can't stand passive aggressive behavior.) It's so sad because my brother had EVERYTHING going for him, he was a smart, good-looking athlete with a good job.

I think "The Secret" goes against the Tao. Negativity and positivity in balance, but you can't take negativity out of life. IMO, life sucks a lot of the time and all we can do is try to endure the bad parts with as much dignity as possible, and enjoy the good parts while they last. I worked with a Chinese woman, for whom I had so much respect, and I had just taken a trip to the Indian Ocean and told her I thought Asians had a calm, serenity that Americans lacked. She told me it is because "Americans think life should be wonderful and they are upset when it isn't, Chinese expect life to be rough, and we are thankful when it is good." I'll never forget that!!

I'm not putting anyone down for following the secret, I'm wrong a lot, and I could be wrong about this, but frankly, I think it is a very dangerous way of thinking. Who has a life without problems? Is it because we bring them on ourselves through our thoughts? Hog wash!!! Of course there is some truth to "Dream it, Be it", and if you don't think a little positive, you'll be too depressed to get out of bed. But it is not so black and white, it's not the whole story, and it makes me mad when I even think about this stuff. No one can escape the pains of life.

I'm very sorry for your troubles, I just don't want you to feel like you are to blame for your bad luck. Hey, I was raised Catholic, I know how bad guilt can be. But, this too shall pass. You WILL get over this hump. Your husband may very well have been fired so he would be free to find another, much better job. Sometimes I think bad things happen to force us to change our course. Like a meteor hitting a planet and changing it's orbit ever so slightly. The meteor will cause a huge disruption, but maybe that was needed. Maybe this whole necklace issue was like a meteor changing your husband's course?

I find it hard to come up with solutions when I am too stressed out. To get through this, maybe try imagining what you would think if you were watching your life in a movie. How dispassionate you would be. How nonjudgmental you would be. How certain you would be of a nice Hollywood ending, and all you had to do was sit back and watch the events unfold. Maybe even imagine you are the scriptwriter and create your own Hollywood ending. Maybe that will get you through the short-term so you can be relaxed enough to think of real solutions. When I'm down and out I like to watch a movie like "Gone With The Wind" and think how I still have it better than Scarlett O'Hara did when she said "I'll never go hungry again." Soon this whole thing will mellow into a memory you and your husband can chuckle about a year or two from now.

Good Luck!! :hug:

question about it. But to me practicing The Secret is like looking for the silver lining, and there always is a silver lining.

Blame is in itself completely negative in the extreme...we may never know why bad things happen to good people, but we do know how being positive can heal and negativity can bring about illness. Your brother may have a point to a certain extent, but HIS blaming is completely against The Secret.

In the Abraham/Hicks book I read, this topic was discussed and we should never encourage anyone to abandon medicine or anything that is healing...but looking for the positive aspects is important. Perhaps your brother needs to see that a person's attitude during a life threatening illness can bring out the best of a person's spirit, sometimes that illness can bring out heroic qualities and give new focus to what is important in life. Sometimes our spirit during these times brings us to a level where we heal and maybe that is the lesson. It is not for us to judge others or their lives. Everyone's quest is different as is everyone's spiritual growth and their journey. I think you are right to tell your brother he is wrong using blame...it's completely negative & so is the impact.

And I TOTALLY agree that we should look for the silver lining. But do you see how the OP has a tone of "my life is bad, so I must be doing something wrong"? That is what I think is dangerous. I think we need to balance positivity and negativity, but we can't eliminate negativity, that goes against the Tao. But to look for the silver lining is in tune with the Tao in my mind because it emphasizes balance, the good with the bad.

Thanks again for the kind tone of the post. Unfortunately I am not in touch with my brother very often anymore. Please pray for him!

can't type!

take on his negativity. He does not see the big picture surrounding himself that you can plainly see. You sound like a kind soul, and you are just looking at the big picture & probably wishing it were different for your brother & his children's sake.

I think Lildreamer and all of us need to be kinder to ourselves too...sometimes we have such high expectations and beat ourselves up.

I agree with other posters here...these things take time, you don't see instant results, but don't stop. Sometimes all of a sudden things start falling into place and then you are a believer. Life is truly about learning and love, and it can mean abundance if we let it.

Sorry, if I sound like a greeting card, but there are some things in my life I have always been grateful for and those places are my best work...I practiced The Secret before I knew that's what it was called. I guess I enjoy knowing that it's there for all of us.

Take care, Suzie & Lildreamer...and remember thoughts become things. Sweet dreams and happy manifesting, the best is yet to come! :)

http://www.jamesray.com/resources/multimedia.php?mm=prodrev_audio < James Ray (from The Secret) radio interview talking about duality and more.

He also has > http://jamesray.com/events/free-seminars.php?mail=y&partner=harmonicwealth.com

will get into this later tonight. I appreciate it!