Sigh--another vivid life-change dream last night

I'm still parsing it, but here are the details:

Mr. MG and I (I don't think MG Jr. was in this dream) were living in our present neighborhood--on this very lot, but the house was our first house, not the one we're in now. Our first house was a small, lakeside, ex-fishing shack (although it had its charms). Anyway, I woke up one morning and went for a walk and met a guy who reminded me of an ex-boyfriend from years and years ago who had proposed to me but I turned him down. He asked me to go to a movie with him on the weekend and I said yes, although I had a feeling it wouldn't go over well with DH (gee I wonder why).

I went home, and I found a HUGE hole in the living room ceiling and Mr. MG cleaning up the mess--apparently he had gone up on the roof to check on the chimney (which was suddenly leaning away from the house), and the roof gave way under his weight.

Then we decided that the house was a lost cause, as lots of other things were wrong with it, so we started cleaning up the lot--having a recycling guy come get some old tires that were in the yard and some tarpaper roof shingles--in preparation for demolishing the house.

That was it. Odd, no?

I really don't know what it means, but it wasn't one of my usual brain-cleaning nonsensical dreams. This one was quite vivid and more like my "MESSAGE!!" dreams. But I don't know what it's trying to say. You would think that all that demolition imagery, along with the other guy asking for a date, would imply that Mr. MG and I were having problems, but we're not. So...:shrug: A clearing out of the old? That's my best guess...Any other guesses?

Wondering about previous choices while clearing some very fundamental old stuff from your current "lot" in preparation for something totally new. I'd have to think about the significance of the roof some more and Mr. MG's efforts to do repairs which weren't effective and precipitated
this broader change. But I think you your immediate response is pretty much the gist of it.

Might think about what part your earlier life has come up for re-examination lately. It's occupying your present 'lot'. Or maybe something you hadn't thought much about comes up unexpectedly that requires some serious changes. How does your husband feel about the changes that have been going in your life lately. Sounds like things have been difficult for you, but ultimatley very positive.

:rofl:

That's not usually his "thing"!

It seems apparent that we have to leave something behind--symbolized by our first house (which, in real life, we "outgrew" because it was so small) and it's state of disrepair being a lost cause, and by a guy asking me for a date when my dating days are long past.

As for our "new life" this year, we seem to have settled into the new routine/life plan, and the bumpy parts are past, which is good...so what else would I have to pay attention to that we need to examine and then leave behind/throw away...? That's what's got me stumped.

Anyway, thanks for your thoughts, Dover! Quite helpful, as always! :hi:

problem. Sounds like you are happy to work on this 'new' life together which trumps the hot date...lol!

The date, I mean. I knew it was incorrect to go, and I don't think I did go, in the end.

houses to me always have to do with my inner universe. I interpret this to mean that you will be able to handle coming changes calmly and clean up any "mess" that happens, and are detached enough to let go of old things that are no longer useful to your life's journey. As for the old boyfriend--this is more of tying up loose karmic ends than anything else.

Absolutely right, Ayesha. I was just rereading my original post, and what struck me was my parenthetical mention (the significant things are always on the periphery, no?) that we had outgrown the lake house.

Sooooo I suspect this means we are finally WILLINGLY giving up the things we've outgrown--seeing them for what they are, which, at this point, means they don't fit into our lives anymore. For instance, we loved, LOVED the lake house and miss it sometimes, but it was too darned small, and we knew we had to move, but we miss it a lot (nostalgia can mess with your head--there were lots of unpleasant issues about living there, but life was simpler, and our money went further).

As for the guy who looked like my ex...I dunno. I sure don't miss him, and I always knew that turning down his proposal was the right thing to do (no regrets, ever)...I'll be happy to tie up the loose karmic ends as long as he doesn't pull a High Fidelity on me like some other exes have--looking me up on the Web and writing a friendly little note at first, and then bursting out "What happened?! Why did we break up????" in the very next e-mail. :eyes:

or sometimes just saying 'I release all ties with X' three times, once each for body mind and spirit. It can be nice to follow with a shower to symbolically wash away the past and energetically clear away any bits of energy you still carry from him. OH! Be sure to call back any bits of you that maybe carried by him. Many people unconsciously give bits of their energy in relationships which is why people say they feel like part of themselves is missing when the relationship is over or the loved one leaves body. The do it yourself version of soul/energy retrieval that I do is to ask my guides and allies to find my bits, gently clear and heal them if they are damaged in any way, and then wrap them in a cocoon of light and love until I am ready to reintegrate them.

And so grateful that it doesn't always have to be handled in person.

Actually, I was joking about him pulling a High Fidelity--he always thought I "done him wrong" (our coworkers could barely speak to me after he told them his sob story of my "ditching him"--if they only knew! :eyes:)--he would be the LAST ex to look me up.

Good point about recalling your energy bits. I'm sure he still thinks he was the victim in the relationship (again: :eyes:), so he might still have bits of me I need to get back.

Thanks, Shallah! :hi:

for energy bits and cords tho. It might be useful to check that house you loved and any other place like that you might have invested a bit of your personal energy in as well (you could check for your husband too). I was surprised once when I checked to find bits of my energy in places I lived even when I very much did not love the place. It was nothing major but all the same I feel better knowing I haven't left fragments however tiny lying about scattering and wasting energy.

The only way to find out what everybody on the board knows is to bring it up, after all! :hi:

Anyway, I realized I've been thinking about the lake house lately because it's back on the market, so we've been following its progress in the real estate section of the paper every Saturday. And I'm sure we left many bits of ourselves in the place--we totally renovated it, and as it was our first house and we were totally broke, we had to do a lot of the work ourselves--that means a lot of sweat, blood, and emotion embedded in those walls. We even cried when we moved out. Yeah, seems like a cleansing is in order--ya think?
:rofl:

the house I live in now has an addition built by my family. My parents couldn't afford a bigger place so they bought what they could afford and added on. I got to design my closet with the shelves and everything the way I wanted built by my Dad how has since crossed over. We were lucky to have so many handy family especially my Grandparents. Even my stepGrandad Mort worked on it in spite of Parkinson's. He couldn't bend good so to work low down he put some casters on a wooden crate and just rolled along. My Gram is a wonderful carpenter as well and impressed my Dad at her figuring out supplies almost down to the last board and nail. They even let me help a bit but after I put in a few nails rather crookedly I figured I was more harm than good and so left it to those who could drive in a nail straight. A lot of hard work and love went into that house but it isn't situated good. We live in Maine with icy winters and on a dirt road with steep hills. The neighbors are supposed to pitch in on maintaining it including plowing and sanding. Everyone who comes in signs an agreement but only a few ever bothered - my Dad who isn't here, a neighbor who sold and moved in that same period, and another who has increasingly bad arthritis. And so since my Dad died each winter when my Grandparents fly south to their mobile my Mother, I and our cats move into my Grandparents house. Being agoraphobe I was the one at first resisting the idea of moving (not that Mom ever did anything but talk). Well the fear plus sheer attachment to the place our family built for us years ago. Now it's my Mom resisting the need to move to a place that we can actually live at safely year around. I don't know if my Mom can let go and I don't know how to help her or even if I can.

Every corner has a memory/attachment, especially if you and/or your family worked on it. I hope you do find a way through your situation, Shallah. Be safe. :hug:

that can make me go :crazy: I just need to remember once I stop mentally/emotionally running in circles like a hamster with an exercise addiction that it really will be OK. I am lucky in this respect with my empathy that I have felt my Dad around especially right after he died both in lucid dreams and when I was wide awake. I would be doing stuff and suddenly feel his presence like he was standing next to me and I would also feel him in my heart like I always felt him when I hugged him. I know he is around and can visit me anywhere :)

ANd the dream usually asks whether the choices I made back then are still valid, particularly in light of who I am now as a result of those choices. So I get the chance to take that 'other' choice for a test drive to see if I like the ride. Ultimately my answer is no, it just wasn't and still isn't right for me.

Exploring alternate reality options--I like it! (In fact, I was just thinking of the Gwyneth Paltrow movie, Sliding Doors, the other day--a great metaphor for multiple realities...I may have to find a copy and rewatch that--very underrated flick.)

He's the old boyfriend, but you prefer the present husband.
It's the old house, but it's on your present lot, and your getting ready to tear it down to make way for something new.

Checking on the chimney...which carries the bad smoke up from the house and away...it's leaning away from the house, so he's fixing it, ensuring that the bad stuff will still float away easily. And he made a great big hole in the roof, all the better for that bad stuff to just float away.

How did you feel when you saw the hole in the roof? Were you upset? Amused? Resigned? Excited?

I didn't think of that! :) I just saw it as Yet Another Thing Wrong With The Place.

When I saw the hole in the roof and the subsequent mess in the living room, it was more of a disgusted, "Ahhh, screw it" moment--actually that feeling kind of permeated the whole dream.

old paramours.

I vote for a pleasant rebirth for your marriage.

How's that?

Also the old house on the new lot is sort of affirmative and reminding you of how you've already transformed many of your old issues.

Very cool.

Well, that would make sense, Stella!

And I vote for a pleasant rebirth in the marriage too--Mr. MG is up for his first job review, scheduled for today, but it could be postponed till next week because of sudden work crises. We both agree: They'd better pony up the cash! He's been busting his hump for that place. Thing is, his boss knows it--and also knows they've had him at bargain prices for a year and a half.

So we see more cash in our future--whether that comes from his present job or him jumping ship to a new job if they don't come across--which will allow us to sleep better at night and smile more, if you know what I mean! As the saying goes, money isn't everything, but it sure helps.

:hi:

you may be invoking some rocky seas by calling the God and Goddess of Love "pesky."

Careful dear, or even weirder dreams may perhaps ensue.

:grouphug:

Somehow I think they might be proud of being "pesky" sometimes. A badge of honor? :evilgrin:

The roof or ceiling of the house has a hole in it, so maybe I don't have a good solid set of beliefs about myself or the world right now (higher beliefs I would think since a roof or ceiling separates you from what's a bove, the sky and the outer world or just the attic, but anyway the world "above," either my mental self or my spiritual self). Maybe I'm evolving a new set of personal beliefs to understand my place in this dimension, spiritual ideals, and I need to take a new look at these ideas and see about renovating them, remodeling them to fit where I am now. The old ideas I had about myself and the world don't fit that phase of my csness now. The more physical and youthful csness needs to be updated maybe, new ideas.

Anyway, the previous responses I agree with wholeheartedly.

Good luck.

I'm still adjusting my belief system since I left my coven several months ago. It's not that I have changed WHAT I believe, nor are my beliefs suddenly shaky, but now I must function, interpret, and learn on my own--and with the help of the wonderful folks in this forum, of course!

Not sure the role that Mr. MG would play in that, as he did in the dream, though...He supports what I am and what I believe, but he doesn't try to influence it. Hmmm....

interpretations too. This is how I was taught ... what is the essence (to YOU) of the ex-bf? What is the essence (to YOU) of Mr.MG? The house is always you.

The essence you possess that is similar to the essence of ex-bf is challenging the essence you possess related to Mr.MG. The two don't mix. The essence, or part of you, similar to Mr.MG is also concerned about repairing something about YOU (higher thoughts?) but together you determine that a whole new structure is needed.

Didn't you say somewhere that he is up for review and a possible raise? (Hope I'm not confused.) That very well could be part of the essence going on.

I'd be interested to know what essence you come up with for those two characters?

What do these individuals represent for me symbolically, you mean? If that's the case, then the guy who looked like my ex would represent my youth, my "freedom" (and I do use that term loosely), and Mr. MG would represent my life as it is now--mature, settled. So that would mean leaving my youth behind (no problem there) and living in the present--and yet the present is also undergoing changes, with things being demolished to make way for the new.

Yes, I did say upthread that Mr. MG was up for a review--it was supposed to take place yesterday but was postponed. It's been on his mind a lot lately, because it will be a tense meeting--his immediate supervisor, who will be doing the review, hates Mr. MG, but Mr. MG's actual boss, the VP, loooooves him, so the guy doing the review won't be able to trash Mr. MG as much as he'd like. Still, it won't be fun. Plus the amount of the raise (there will be one, but the question is will it be substantial or a cost-of-living token) will determine whether Mr. MG stays there or takes his talents elsewhere. So the potential exists for more changes in the future...

This is gonna be interesting...hee.

isn't exactly what they represent. It is more about who they ARE to you. The essence is a personal trait or quality that you associate with that person (which in turn reflects that quality in yourself).

Before the break-up, what quality did you most appreciate about the ex-bf? Was it that he let you be free? Even though he tried to tie the knot? For some reason in the dream you didn't want to turn down the offer, even though you suspected it wouldn't work out. Are you thinking you'll agree to freedom but don't believe in it? (I'm thinking there is another essence at work here.)

All I'm saying is that the people in our dreams represent portions of ourselves. I say this all the time and I know not everyone agrees. I saw a therapist who was interested in dreams, and this is the method he taught me. Through months of dream examinations and sessions, I could finally accept this as true.