Does going without sex really make you more spiritual?

A MySpace friend of mine who is supposedly into alternative spirituality just posted a blog regarding sex, masturbation and what it does to your soul. Although I do believe in the keeping of marital vows and that any non-consensual sex is wrong, I do not agree that sex between consenting adults is a healthy outlet (as long as it's "safe"), as is masturbation. This person wrote the following about masturbation:
"Masturbation is a form of "self"sex in the mind of the person taking part in it whether it is male or female, as you are creating an image that will produce arousal and release. What gives you the right to use this person in that way? That is one issue, and it doesn't matter if you know them or not. The next issue is that it creates a form of self-love, and this is not love but a type of lust.

Each time you take part in the act of masturbation, you become more susceptible to delusions. This leads to dependency and will eventually turn into an addiction, which is why dealing with an addiction to masturbation is so difficult because pornography is available almost everywhere online, onscreen or on the corner."

Then, on the sex act itself:

"Additionally, refraining from the release of bodily fluids that directly relate to sexual climax in the mystical sense builds up one's personal powers. That's why celibacy was introduced, as lust and desire in spiritual warfare is a powerful tool that is employed by the dark side.

I've seen many a good man/woman in the Christian community, as well as the self-help/new age movement, who have had their careers cut short because they could not handle their sexual desires in their personal/professional lives."

Personally, after living in Utah for 20 years and seeing many a "chaste" Christian man who can't keep his hands off little kids, I think we need to stop with the demonization of healthy sexual outlets. To me, when a spiritual leader tells me that masturbation is wrong, he's trying to control me in some way. I think we'd obsess less about sex in this country if we'd stop with the guilt.
Here is the whole blog if you'd like to read it:
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=317002111&blogID=421141898&indicate=1

This is not a sex thread and I hope it will not be locked by the mods...

I'm surprised that writer knows how to operate a computer seeing as how he's firmly stuck in the Victorian age! I thought Kinsey put to rest the ridiculous beliefs about masturbation (hairy palms and all that) some what, 50 years ago?

Guilt over the honorable expression of sexuality has probably done more harm than most everything else. It's time to get over it and allow humans to be who they are!

Well, first of all, celibacy was introduced, in Christianity, at least, as a form of PROPERTY control. In medieval times, the Church wanted to make sure that when a man became a monk that the Church or the monastery was the sole inheritor of the person's property (the wealth sure helped the monasteries and of course gave a boost, albeit a lesser one considering how much wealth it already had, to the Church). The Church wanted to make sure that it had no competitors or anyone in the man's family who would have prior claim on the property.

And we all see how well THAT worked out, didn't we? I recall seeing a medieval sketch of bare-bummed monks cavorting with prostitutes in their living quarters. And talk about a double standard--I can't find the image online, but there's a famous painting of a medieval pope (I think it was a Medici) with his grandchildren!

And I'm afraid that the person writing the blog is a little behind the times regarding his view of "bodily fluids". It's been proven that, for physical health (men's prostate health especially), people should participate in sexual activity, even alone, on a regular basis. Spiritually, the kundalini is kept healthy and flowing by sexual activity, and sex magic (with the full permission of both parties) is a powerful art form.

Last, and this point irks me greatly every time I see it, focusing on sexual activity does NOT lead normal grown men to molest small boys. Conversely, denying sexual activity also does not lead normal grown men to molest small boys. Also, homosexual men who deny their urges are not led to moelst small boys--homosexuality and pedophilia are NOT one and the same. Instead, it seems that men who already have a sexual deviance/have a skewed view of sexuality), or a true pathology that leads them to be attracted to small children, may take refuge in the Church, becoming a member of the clergy in the hopes that this will help them control their sexual urges. And of course this practice, of denial of the deviance and not dealing with it through therapy (not facing it at all), then leads these men to act out uncontrollably. (I have heard more than one anecdote about a homosexual man who entered the priesthood hoping to be "cured" or at least hoped to bury his urges.)

Thanks for bringing up this subject, ClassicFilmFan. I hope it doesn't get locked too, because it's a valid topic to discuss.

and responsible for a tremendous amount of suffering.

Kindness and compassion is the rule for all relationships, sexual or not
It is depressing to go down the list of "enllightened masters" who told their
followers to abstain from sex while leading abusive and sexually
predatory lives themselves.

Having observed this so many times, I can only conclude this is
the rule rather than the exception.
If someone is setting boundaries around others sexual lives,
you can be sure that person is a manipulator.
Your correspondent needs professional help before he/she
hurts himself or someone else.

'creates a form of self-love'?

is part of total health. Personally, I'm content to do without a partner, but if I go too long without orgasm itself, my total health (including emotional health and neurological health) starts to suffer.

And don't even get me started on this: "'Masturbation is a form of 'self' sex in the mind of the person taking part in it whether it is male or female, as you are creating an image that will produce arousal and release. What gives you the right to use this person in that way?"

No offense, but your friend has Issues. Notice the capitalization of the 'I' in front of 'ssues'? Not a mistake.

Finally, celibacy/chastidy has nothing to do with why pedophiles molest children.

Charge of the Goddess

if the Great Spirit had not intended people to have orgasms, she would not have given them the means. And she also gave us Free Will.

Thoughts are things, this should be more obvious now with the increasing connection to God. Someone wrote that orgasm ties the secret chakra together with the other person's. You have to uncord, if you know how.

And if you follow the mentalist philosophies, anything you visualize, you create/attract. Yogananda wrote that limiting sex avoids many entaglements :D

I have found this to be true.

I am also getting a kick out what chapter this is found in.

Then there is this.


For me I had to do the celibacy thing for a while.Chasing the girls was causing problems in my cultivations.While it really sucked for a while I know now it was the best thing for me to do and it actually paid off in the long run.
And one last thing to keep in mind.


Always remember that any type of attachment is not a good thing.It does not matter whether it is an attachment to sex or anything else.

My job does not allow me to surf outside websites.

Thanks to all who answered. I went off my rocker on this a bit, but the sexual guilt thing pisses me off, especially when it's repeated by someone who claims to be "enlightened." It is behind so many horrible things in our society and we need to get rid of it.

and I don't consider masturbation an harmful practice. Heck doctors have caught FETUS doing it on ultrasound! Now unless a body subscribes to the belief in orignal sin or similar system that condems physicality and matter as innately sinful, evil, or other wise defective I take this as proof this is normal and natural behavior. I somehow doubt those fetus were violating Brad Pitt or Ms Jolie or anyone else at that moment any more than when a little baby or toddler discovers some body parts are more interesting than others. If you can stomach it look up the history of how parents on the advice of experts tried to stop normal activities from burning ointments to severing nerves.

IMO I am currently more inclined to believe celibacy is more about control and creating a nice source of guilt to exploit than encourage spiritual growth unless one considers spiritual growth the total rejection of the body each one of us was gifted with at birth. It is scary how our bodies have involuntary reactions and can be embarrassing at times how we burp, break wind, and react to people we find attractive. So scary that some religions and philosophies have grown up trying to figure out a way to escape that nasty scary body ASAP. And as this is often connected with equating females with being extra nasty and scary examples of physical form I find myself instantly skeptical of those bits of ancient wisdom being a female myself.

I've been celibate awhile now, and I am certainly no more "spiritual" than before. You know, we don't "do" anything to be spiritual. We just are. Actually a relationship helps ground me and I don't feel so scattered. Maybe some people associate that scattered brain for spirituality. However, it also divorces us from our real spirituality which includes the body, mind and soul. If someone has personal reasons, so be it. Otherwise, it is the healthiest thing one can do for themselves and our world. It is required for survival, you know.

and enjoy! many that block their sex energy too much turn to obsessive thoughts about sex or having sex and it makes it much worse.

She says that "all acts of pleasure are my rituals". Being a Pagan, that works for me.

leads to all kinds of ills. Having worked very hard to overcome sexual repression issues related to a strict religious upbringing (that infamous, pervasive "Catholic guilt" :)), I believe we'd all be a lot healthier and happier in this country if we let go of the needless guilt.

America has such a schizophrenic relationship with sex. On the one hand, you have the Puritans who wish to prevent people from experiencing sex in any other way that does not fit into their narrowly prescribed box, and on the other, you have an advertising industry that cheapens the sex act and degrades it, often mingling it with violence to sell things that no one really needs. And it's a very limited view of sexuality that advertisers tout as well - mainly from the viewpoint of the adolescent male, and they encourage everyone to identify with it.