A compilation of my responses to the latest Elizabeth thread.

Original thread

I'm going to say something that may earn me a lot of enemies and a coveted spot on many an ignore list.

I think Edwards lied about his affair to protect his ideals.

Yes, that's right.

I know, we don't think lying for an ideal exists anymore. Not after 8 years of Bush-Cheney and their fucked-up conception of "ideals". It's just excuse-making trumped up in pretty language, as far as we're concerned.

But I say we need to start entertaining that possibility.

He lied to protect their viability. He knew what the MSM thought of him. He knew that a weak moment on his part-- which I believe the affair was-- would be blown up into a giant moral failing. And for many of us that was, in fact, what his weak moment became.
To our detriment, IMO.

Because it does none of us any good to have only one response to every person who cheats-- condemnation. It kills discussion dead about the mental processes involved in an affair, and therefore how to truly prevent cheating; and especially how to deal with one of our deepest fears-- that our life partner will abandon us once we become sickly, old, poor or all three.
Avoiding discussion about these things will not solve ANYONE'S problems-- the Edwards' or ours.

They both are handling this beautifully. He's staying out of sight until after the election, and hopefully doing work behind-the-scenes; she's putting herself out there, as she should for health care.

I'm particularly impressed by her laying down the law with the press: stick only to the topic at hand. No personal interviews.

There's something different about JE's affair versus Clinton's, or Gary Hart's. Cheating is not a pattern on JE's part, like it was with Clinton (and maybe Hart). His affair looks like a genuine weak moment, in the face of overwhelming sense of comfort and escape the other woman offered, temporarily.

Why was he able to resist the pull until now? You would think, for instance, that he would've cheated on Elizabeth after their son died-- bar none, the greatest strain on their marriage.

And you'd think he would've been used to women throwing themselves at him-- they probably have for all his life. He'd been able till now to resist the charms of all those women-- what was different about this time, besides the cancer?

Nothing is ever going to get solved or answered by black-or-white moralizing about affairs. Yes, he cheated on a sickly wife. That's the hardest point to get around. It's the main impetus behind dealing with Edwards in such a binary fashion.

But do we learn anything?

Do we ever figure out what to do, to fight those destructive emotions that propel someone to think it's OK to abandon a partner once they become less than whole?

Do we ever learn how to love and promote a person's ideas at the same time we hate their decisions?
(Those who believe Edwards was a phony all along have answered that question for themselves. It's a simple answer to the question. Well, part of our task as progressives is to beware the quick and simple decision.)

Do we ever come up with an answer to the problem of intelligent wives being "uncomfortable", and stupid but cheerful and accommodating mistresses being "comfortable"; and thereby debunk the idea that brains are sexually unattractive?

No, we do not. We really don't do much of anything when we think black-or-white.

bigger than him and I have never thought it was about the political gain.

as per her lastest appearance.. the fight was about Elizabeth...she was the one who urged John to "help america" It's all about her now not him. I'm with her

wearing it because of the weight gain from chemo? The last three to four months of both my pregnancies I couldn't wear mine - I wouldn't have wanted people to speculate that I wasn't married. I'm not going to speculate on one report of her not wearing it.

for last 3 weeks he was kicked to the curb. My Mom had chemo and just the opposite.. couldn't keep weight on her.

edited to say... good for Elizabeth! She's always been my hero and more impressive imo!

The one that salivates as it contemplates obliterating the standards and goals that Edwards was pushing?

If the Elizabeth and John Edwards ever decide to end their marriage and they, themselves, make a public statement I will take it seriously. Until then, it's only malicious gossip.

and she quit wearing her rings because she become bloated after the chemo sessions. So if Elizabeth appeared without her ring and/or rings I think it was due to the chemo.

I refuse to believe any type of gossip until I hear from John and Elizabeth.

wishing you the best...am over him. But Elizabeth was always the one who initiated interest in him after meeting her in moving speech so many years ago.

involved. Other countries don't turn a whole election on whether there has been an affair or other such nonsense... the US stands quite alone in this.

Yes, I'm disappointed in him, but that is really between him and Elizabeth.

The issue is that NOBODY HAS TAKEN ON POVERTY SINCE JOHN EDWARDS "DISAPPEARED".

THAT is the tragedy, and the immorality of our system, and of the Democrats in particular.