Holiday thing

Hey,

Some time ago, I noticed that our house got all not very good over the holidays. So, I tried to mock up a "holiday alert" for myself, so those days wouldn't sneak up on us.

Anybody know what I mean?

Sometimes I think we are forced to be with people because at one time there was'nt so much distraction in the world and politics were'nt everywhere.People tart bragging about how great thier lives are and get competative and catty. yeah holidays have been destroyed by these images of what they are supposed to be.

Though I'm not religious... it's the stress of the holidays. My brain goes kinda funky, and trying to get a handle on it can be difficult. Thankfully my therapist pointed it out to me, so I see it now, which is the first step (she says) in dealing with it.

to peak around Easter time until I found out that that tends to happen for all depressives. I have the same problem in late August-Early September. Theoretically, it's related to the rapid lengthening/shortening of days associated with that time of year.I's fighting it this year with a bright light recommended for treatment of Seasonal affective disorder.

We're saving to buy one of those. Darkness makes me sleepy!

Because I never wanted to be born here.I put on a show tho so people "celebrating" won't feel bad,none are the wiser to this,except my partner.He's very sdupportive..I really do appreciate the gifts and all but the depression is crushing and it is all I can do to get through.I check them out for real after my birthday is over,after the depression is gone..But for others sake I wait until they leave and after I shut the door,I find I just wanna curl up and cry on that day..

Is anyone else like this?

The Thanksgiving to New Year's stretch is my worst time of the year. I try to put on a good face. But I really just want to get it over with. I usually need a medication adjustment to get through it.

My partner has lot of trouble on the run up to all holidays; I seem to get low after the holidays until the light is brighter and Spring training starts. Why baseball, I've no idea. But if the season was ever cancelled, I'd be in a really bad way.

Lately, the holidays have been all right, even good. But there's a moment still when I'm just ready to cancel the whole thing. The weight of other people sometimes just seems like it will be too much, and the bed looks really good.

In any case, I've programmed holiday alerts into my calendar, so they don't sneak up on me. Nothing worse than getting jumped by a childhood hero like Santa or the Easter Bunny or the flag. :)