I came back from my other doctor today:

I have PTSD after getting my infection and nearly dying from it. Although I may not be thinking about it consciencely, it, i think, still cause mental anguish for me and my parents. The one things that really is hard to deal with is "disturbances" that I see.

:(

Any of you guys know some ways to deal with it? Or at least help me in some way?

I don't know a lot about your situation, but it sounds like
you've been through a very scary time. You mentioned that
you almost died from an illness. That would be very
traumatic.

I have PTSD, due to childhood stuff. However, the underlying
dynamics of PTSD are pretty universal (whether you survive an
illness, a war, a bad childhood or a bad accident). When you have
an extremely stressful situation that you can't immediately
process--your mind and body help you--by putting those emotions
on hold.

I imagine, with your illness--you tried hard to be strong
and to fight back from your illness. You couldn't feel
every emotion, because you were trying to get healthy
again and gain strength. It makes sense that you would
suppress some of your emotions. In fact, it's an intelligent,
creative response--and something you needed to to do survive.

You mentioned that "disturbances" are hard to deal with. I imagine,
since you've got a lot of emotions pent up--that seeing strong
emotion triggers your pent up emotions (I hope that makes sense!). It
sounds like you have some pretty powerful emotions that are emerging--and those
emotions are right there on the surface. Now that your illness is better,
these emotions are closer to the "surface"--to enable you to deal
with them now.

That's what my therapist kept reminding me. My emotions came when I
was strong and ready. The emotions were scary--intense fear, anger,
sadness, helplessness. However--it takes the mind a ton of energy
to hold those emotions down--and your mind will only allow you to
process--when you're on solid ground.

When you feel scared or upset--try to remain calm and allow yourself to
process them. Find a safe place. Write about your emotions--this helped me tremendously.
When my fear would surface, I kept reminding myself that I was safe and ok
now--a resourceful adult who survived! I was feeling emotions that I had
to temporarily suspend--but that I would be ok. These emotions were "moving
through" me--they weren't due to something that was happening at the moment.

Another thing my therapist said---the worst has all ready happened and you
survived. That's certainly true for you. You were very ill and you were very
terrified. You're ok now. Your mind just needs to release all of the
emotions surrounding that event.

You WILL be ok. I know this is scary. However, there is light at the end
of the tunnel. Processing these emotions is the way to freedom. After some
of my intense emotions were purged--I literally felt as if someone removed
an anchor from my shoulders! Releasing these emotions won't hurt you.
It might feel scary and sad sometimes--but you will get through this.

I strongly recommend that you find a therapist who can help you through this time.
I saw a PTSD expert, and you should find a therapist who understands PTSD.

Also, try Googling PTSD. You will find a bounty of information. It's helpful
to read about PTSD, and realize that you aren't going crazy or weak or off the
deep end. The more you read about PTSD, the more you will understand yourself
and that will help your healing.

Best to you. I hope that helped in some way! :hug:

My therapist said to create something to defeat these "things"

So I came up with Cloud Strife to defeat them.

:D

lol

:hug:
:grouphug:

:thumbsup:

:hi:

DemEx

And years ago I got a really bad sickness that almost wiped me out, Mycoplasma Incognitus,Back in the 80's they could not figure out what was making me so sick. I had to have my tests shipped overseas for a lab that could detect what I had.
Anyways I was really sick for a month.Before they even found a medicine to stop it.I was taking some very powerful antibiotics and my system is still recovering from that.


I still get a little freaked by fevers,and certain symptoms
But I know what I had when I got really sick is not a garden variety flu.I remind myself of this if I get a cold or something so I don't freak out.
Every time I get a minor illness and recover in a day or a few days I find I begin to trust myself more in knowing really sick from just sick. I realize the chances of getting that sick again from that strain of mycoplasma is not a common occurrence in my life or most other people's lives.It was a rare disease..

I don't know what you had, but if it was that bad most likely it isn't common place illness for you either. And to remind yourself it's not common in your life to be THAT sick might help the next time you get some minor illness that may mimic some of the symptoms of the serious illness in a much milder way.If you can find someone to help you ,to comfort you and point out why a particular sickness IS NOT the same thing as the bad sickness was might help. I find looking at differences between illnesses instead of similarities helps me. Might work for you I dunno.