Everyday stress - dealing with the "little things"

Hi All,

After reading several threads on this forum, I am torn. While I'm comforted to see that I am not alone and that there are so many people out there who understand without judgment, it also makes me sad for all of us that we have our various problems.

That said, here's the short version of my story.

I live with depression, generalized anxiety and full-blown panic attacks. Been on several different meds, now just take Xanax a few times per day. I've been able to determine that my periods of depression are sparked directly from periods of high anxiety and increased panic. I get so frustrated with the anxiety/panic that I withdraw and become depressed. So obviously, in my case (and we're all different), controlling the anxiety/panic is the key.

What I seem to have a real problem with is the everyday so-called "little things" that frustrate me and cause anxiety. I am a person of routine. I don't like change. I like things to go today the same way they went yesterday. I'm single, live alone, no kids, so I can do pretty much whatever I want around my place. I like it that way.

I have extreme trouble dealing with disruptions in the routine. I get very frustrated and annoyed if my "little things" aren't there for me. Like many of you, I am sure, I actually feel the physical pain of stress. Pain in my hands, arms, legs, back, neck, etc. Sharp pains. I've been told all of this is stress, but I'm still very scared of it.

The following examples may sound trivial, even selfish, and obviously there's a part of me that recognizes that, so I want to find possible ways to change, based on anyone's experience.

-If the power goes out due to a storm or something, I get REALLY frustrated and anxious. I'm not sure what I am "afraid" of or what I think is going to happen; I just don't like it. It bothers me to not have my "little things" available.

-My cable was out for four days. I was extremely anxious. I felt cut off from so much of my routine. (Again, I KNOW this sounds trivial. I know it sounds selfish. I know I should be thankful for what I DO have. I want to change.)

-Changes in my working hours bothers me. I even had to call in sick one day because I was up all night the night before I had to be at work several hours earlier, and I spent the entire night worrying that I wouldn't get to sleep...and I never did.

Does this make sense to anyone? Does it sound familiar? Does anyone have any experience with crap like this? Any success stories?

Thanks for letting me vent. I actually feel a little better just having written this out!

Here's hoping everyone is doing well.

For years, I was just a grouch frequently, with no tolerance for things that I felt were not done my way. Through the years, things seemed to get a little worse and after a chat with my doctor and several visits to a therapist, it was determined that I had slowly sunk into a mild case of depression.

I am compelled to do things my way and it has been a little hard to change my ways but things have been much better since I realized that circumstances such as mine are not unusual. Neither is yours. Keep up the good fight, see a doc if you can and if anti-depressants are prescribed, they do help and are not necessarily forever. Also note that certain antidepressants are available at Wal-mart and Target for $4.00. Print out the list and take it to your doc. He can easily prescribe from one of their lists. I am not a pill popper but sometimes our systems need a little help to get back where they should be.

When I am feeling as though it is a struggle, I listen to:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=EeNFmwpywaA&mode=related&search=%

Great lyrics, sing along!

And, it used to get in my way so much.

If I can say this, what finally helped me any way was to respect my own process, my own reaction. I used to beat myself up something awful for just being upset. When I could extend some empathy to me, finally a lot of my own anxiety issues just cleaned themselves up. It was as if my own system had being saying "Get a clue! If you're not good to you, you will not feel well!".

And that was news to me.

Best wishes to you.

Beth

Recognize the feelings and state of being too.

What helped me change this strict requirement for control over my environment to the extent you are talking about was practicing Zen Meditation formally and regularly in a group for several years. I discovered what it was I was doing - in my words I feel it was Ego exerting itself and clamouring to be the boss over it all - while learning to let this go more, to just "be" in the moment and take what comes by in an authentic and gracious manner. Forcing oneself to sit in meditation, and once in awhile to do weekend retreats of sitting and walking meditation from 5 a.m. with breaks til 10pm was sometimes tortuously confrontational - me with myself - but a very beneficial learning experience.

I learned the huge difference there between Ego attempts to control and self-awareness and self-confidence.

I, too feel that my anxiety and panic disorder brought on my depression, for when I learned to deal with my anxieties in a satisfying way, depression never visitied itself upon me in full force again.

DemEx

I read each post and took something away from each. Very helpful thoughts. Thank you so much.

stress goes up, anxiety goes up and i find myself getting extremely frustrated by seemingly trivial things. i recently got a new roommate and it threw my balance out of whack and there are times i feel myself getting worked up about things that are really trivial (like the cupboard doors being left open or the dishwasher being loaded in a way i consider wrong).

i can understand the importance of routine because there are days that it feels like that is the only thing over which i have control.

when i find myself getting stressed out about these things, i stop, take a step back and just focus on my breathing for a few minutes and get myself centered.

not real stellar advice, i know, but it's what i do to get through those days. that and my ativan :)

when my power went out last week I took my candles into the bathroom and ran a hot bath.

Not only did it keep me warm, but it helped relax me so I fell asleep with ease.

I haven't had tv since 9/11 so I have substituted the internet, when the power goes out I have lost most communication with the world, except for my phone. If your cable goes out you can try the radio or even watching movies on youtube, or on your tv. There is life after cable!

As far as my success dealing with other anxiety issues I have-none yet except diversion. I did find that for the few days I was taking lamictal that my memory went in the toilet. I would start to think about something that normaly would cause anxiety and I couldn't get past just a few fleeting thoughts and wasn't even able to hold onto those. I felt somewhat lobotomized!

Right now I am waiting another week or two to make sure the lamictal is completely out of my system before I think of taking anything else for bipolar/anxiety. I am scared to death that I will have other adverse reactions to meds as I am hypersensitive...