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This year has been great.
I have felt for years like a big depressive blanket lay over the future and I was helpless. The politics coinciding with this would be the long-term resurgence of (R) "conservatism" nationally - Reagan trouncing the hero of my teenage years, Carter. I am afraid I was distracted during the Clinton years, and then the 8 * years were hell, at some point looking like it would never end. I smoked too much, stopped gardening, drank, lost the idea of a future beyond individual fiscal gain...general depression I suppose would be the clinical thing, manifested as the adoption of self destructive personal habits and negativity.
So how does one get over that? I am not sure, but I remembered how much I enjoyed life growing up. Around February, as I watched a good man running for our highest office, I pondered the hypothetical questions: what if we had good government, what if our society was healthy and whole, what if this country became truly a force for good in the world, and then how should I be if I was a part of this whole?
I stopped smoking that month, and have not since. A small thing. I began to work on our long neglected vegetable garden, which has occupied myself and my daughters for many hours and provided us with many good meals through this spring and summer. As gas prices have risen and I am enjoying my health, I parked the car and have been bicycling to work and shopping. I drink a bit of wine still, but nothing that would interfere with good health.
...its all small things. But the sum has been that life is enjoyable, such a simple thing which I think of now as a key to surviving whatever travail the future might bring.
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