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What's the most productive way to deal with objectionable threads PART 2

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Kerrytravelers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jul-31-05 05:15 PM
Original message
What's the most productive way to deal with objectionable threads PART 2
Without naming any threads or linking, my suggestion for dealing with objectional threads depends on how patient you are.

I often give the poster the benefit of the doubt (unless I recgnize them as one of the typical offenders) andcalmly explain my position and WHY I feel this way. I do my best to assume they didn't realize they were being offensive, for that would be the way I would want to be dealt with. In the past, I have written responding posts that someone took objection to. They addressed me the way I have described and it turned into a good learning experience for all involved.

If we're ever going to get back to a sense of common ground and dialogue in this country, we have to learn how to speak to one another and listen to one another.

That being said, if the poster continues the reckless disregard for others past 2 posts of dialogue with you and is showing no sense of wanting to learn and grow, alert immediately.
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eleny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jul-31-05 10:49 PM
Response to Original message
1. If it was only one person in a thread, it would be easier
What troubles me is people posting after the OP and each one tries for a new adjective along the same theme. And all are female put downs. Taking on several different individuals in a thread can be tough, even here at DU where I might expect people to understand. Maybe I don't think they will understand.

Thanks for your advice.
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 07:14 AM
Response to Original message
2. I think the forum rules are clear about what is objectionable:
Edited on Mon Aug-01-05 07:20 AM by BlueIris
2. Civility: Treat other members with respect. Do not post personal attacks against other members of this discussion forum.

3. Content: Do not post messages that are inflammatory, extreme, divisive, incoherent, or otherwise inappropriate. Do not engage in anti-social, disruptive, or trolling behavior. Do not post broad-brush, bigoted statements.

4. Copyrights: Do not copy-and-paste entire articles onto this discussion forum. When referencing copyrighted work, post a short excerpt (not exceeding 4 paragraphs) with a link back to the original.


They're also clear on how to deal with objectionable threads and posts:

5. Forum Administration: Respect the moderators and administrators, and respect their decisions. You can help make their job easier by clicking the "Alert" link on any post that might need moderator attention. Please understand that moderating errors and inconsistencies are inevitable on a large website like this. If you have a question about DU policies, or if you have a concern about an action a moderator has taken, please contact an admin privately.

Trust me, I wish there were other ways of dealing with objectionable threads, but I've given up attempting to make changes. I think we have to go by what the rules we've agreed to adhere to state we should do about objectionable shit on the boards.

So, I alert immediately on any thread or post that violates the stated guidelines. As to whether I respond before or after alerting--Kerrytraveler, I get what you're saying with this, I really do:

"If we're ever going to get back to a sense of common ground and dialogue in this country, we have to learn how to speak to one another and listen to one another."

But I don't feel that anyone who has violated the posting guidelines is someone I'm obligated to "listen" to, or try to communicate with. Also, the DU forums aren't "this country," they're a message board. There are slightly broader laws, rules and boundaries governing how civilized individuals should interact with each other in the "real world," especially considering how tolerant that world has become of incivility, misogyny, bigotry and brutality. Sometimes, there really is NO POINT in trying to explain to someone why he or she is wrong, being inappropriate, or in violation of the rules. In my experience, there are very few occasions in which trying to reason with someone who is being misogynist in particular can lead to a "productive" outcome. My new strategy is to alert, sometimes after pointing out the misogyny of the poster in a post of my own, and move on.
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Kerrytravelers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 10:37 AM
Response to Reply #2
5. You're right, I don't advocate spending a great amount of time
dialoguing with people. I know, I'm probably too willing to tolerate some things that are against the rules if I can get them to change their attitude.

Everyone makes mistakes and I'd hate to alienate a good Dem who has the opportunity to learn. But, with the onslought of trolls we've had here lately, perhaps I shuldn't bother at all!
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 09:00 AM
Response to Original message
3. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 10:15 AM
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 04:25 PM
Response to Reply #4
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Lars39 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 05:20 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. It was highlighting a thread
in which a DUer seemed to be shedding an identity. :)
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eleny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 05:21 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. I was hoping you saw it and would PM me with the details
I'm such an obvious stinker!
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Lars39 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 05:30 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. Check your inbox. : - )
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Eloriel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 05:48 PM
Response to Reply #9
10. Hit mine too, please
I wanna know!!!!
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 05:56 PM
Response to Reply #10
11. You might not want to know, actually.
Edited on Mon Aug-01-05 05:56 PM by BlueIris
It was pretty terrible. But, hey, good for fleshing out your ignore list.
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Beaverhausen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 07:24 PM
Response to Reply #9
14. mine too
what was that???
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lukasahero Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 07:40 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. me three?
What'd I miss?
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Eloriel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 06:14 PM
Response to Original message
12. And what, exactly, is your track record for conversions?
Edited on Mon Aug-01-05 06:15 PM by Eloriel
I'd really like to know. Does "a good learning experience for all involved" equal conversion?

If not, what's the point? Really. Just to be civil, and "nice" and have a sense of "common ground and dialogue" (I think you're fooling yourself on that one, frankly.)

I've seen women here at DU (not necessarily posting in this forum) be SO nice and sweet and even-tempered and accommodating and interested in "dialoging" with DU sexists that their points got run over as if by a steamroller.

Now, let me be clear. I'm not saying I think you are wrong for taking your approach: frankly, I have no way of knowing (but it's one reason I asked about your conversion rate). It's not MY style (quite obviously), and I don't particularly like seeing it, and I'll rarely engage in that type of engagement simply because (a) I don't think they deserve or warrant ANY respect from me whatsoever, (b) I don't believe they'll get the point by our being nicey-nice**** and (c) it's not my style anyway (yeah, I know I already said that).

**** This is why I don't think being nicey-nice works:
"Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them, and these will continue till they are resisted with either words or blows, or with both. The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress. Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never has, and never will.” -Frederick Douglass

Who am I to argue with Frederick Douglass? Further, in order for your approach to work, you have to be engaging with people who WANT to do right, who WANT to be egalitarian, who WANT women's equality and care enough about it to change their wicked ways. It is my considered opinion -- confirmed too often by hard observation -- that those men who are at DU have had AMPLE opportunity by this time in their lives AND after 2nd Wave Feminism to learn right and do right. And they haven't, and that's pretty much all I need to know about them: they prefer to hold onto their (white) male privilege which grants them automatic superiority and advantage over half the human race, simply by virtue of their birth. It's okay to them for women to be "just so equal and no more." Typically, that's true as well for people of color: just so equal and NO MORE!
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-01-05 06:30 PM
Response to Reply #12
13. Nice post, Eloriel.
Nothing against your desire to communicate effectively with others and find common ground where it can be found, Kerrytraveler, but to me, trying to "work with them," by feigning respect for their sexist, misogynist or bigoted beliefs allows the objectionable to validate those beliefs. Which doesn't help them. Continue to handle the problem how you see fit, of course, it's still a relatively free board, but that approach just isn't going to work for me.
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