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bloom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-30-06 03:17 PM
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Narcissist Misogynists
There is a Narcissist on the web - who apparently stokes his ego by posting essays on all things Narcissistic. This is from one of those essays ->

Narcissists are misogynists........The narcissist often says that he has a contract with his girlfriend/spouse. This contract has emotional articles and administrative-economic articles. One of the substantive clauses of this contract is emotional and sexual exclusivity.

...The narcissist, though highly amoral (and at times, immoral), holds himself, morally, in high regard. He describes contracts as "sacred" and feels averse to canceling or violating them even if they had expired or are invalidated by the behavior of the other parties.

...Still, some narcissists prefer less complicated and less threatening sex: devoid of all emotion, anonymous (group sex, prostitution) or autoerotic (homosexual or masturbation). The sexual partner, in these conditions, lacks identity, is objectified and dehumanized. Exclusivity cannot be demanded of objects and the potential risk of unfaithfulness is happily allayed.

...Moreover, the narcissist himself is unlikely to cultivate a long-term relationship with a psychologically healthy, independent, and mature woman. He seeks her dependence within a relationship of superiority and inferiority (teacher-student, guru-disciple, idol-admirer, therapist-patient, doctor-patient, father-daughter, adult-adolescent or young girl, etc.).

http://samvak.tripod.com/msla5.html

http://samvak.tripod.com/index.html


Seems like I've heard some of this before.
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-03-06 02:36 AM
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1. Sounds like my ex, whom one shrink suggested might be narcissitic.
Blech.

Thank gods I have mainly SANE men in my life at this time.
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bloom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-03-06 11:26 AM
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4. blech is right
I have a brother-in-law that this stuff could have been written about. So I know how they can be.

I didn't ever have to live with him, though.


I'm glad he's your ex.
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ismnotwasm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-03-06 09:09 AM
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2. Everyday
Right now I'm fuming. I don't usually. I'm perfectly capable-- and do stay emotionally detatched. But I am well and truly pissed at some of the additudes towards rape and women lately, and tying it all to a narcissitic personality disorder suits my mood this morning.

Didn't mean to highjack your thread!

I read a wonderful essay about Sojourner 'Truth' yesterday, connected her profound words of that meeting in Ackron, Ohio, with the larger issues of feminism today. This isn't the essay, (I found it off my university access so I can't link, but reading her words makes me feel better. So here, If I may share
http://www.fordham.edu/halsall/mod/sojtruth-woman.html

Ah well, of to my Union meeting.
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bloom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-03-06 11:23 AM
Response to Reply #2
3. "tying it all to a narcissistic personality disorder"
I think it's a reasonable way to look at some of the posts here and elsewhere. Esp. those who are obsessive about demeaning women.


It probably makes more sense than expecting to enlighten some of these people. That's just bound to be frustrating.

Not that they shouldn't be called on it. We don't need the narcissists being the definers of what is true.



I love Sojourner Truth.
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ismnotwasm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-03-06 06:53 PM
Response to Reply #3
5. She rocks.
Went to my meeting, came back, took a nap (I work nights, so I'm off time) Woke up, cruised through DU and a few other sites, and even though I'm in a much better mood, nothing I've seen has changed my mind.

My husband would call them the I, I, me, me, I people. (it's funny when he does it.)

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Warpy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-02-06 10:15 AM
Response to Reply #3
8. We're not going to reach the narcissist
but our posts are read by more than just the guys who are in love with their own egos (and appendages). Our posts are being read by people who are reachable and who are looking for answers to the specious arguments put out by the narcissists when they are promoting their misogyny.

No educational post is ever a wasted post.
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marions ghost Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-16-06 12:01 PM
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6. not all narcissists
are mysogynists but it's a lethal combination when it occurs. Nasty and destructive. Women struggle to get out of whatever relationship they have with them.

I have seen some interesting combinations--the narcissist woman and the narcissist man becoming some sort of mega-narcissist creature. This combination can have great power over others.

And we're all aware of the BFEE narcissist club--a whole nest of em.
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nashville_brook Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-01-06 10:51 PM
Response to Original message
7. it's my soon-to-be ex...
i stayed way too long for a "a psychologically healthy, independent, and mature woman." my bad!

the misogynism comes in many forms. john wasn't an overt pig. he was covert -- almost like an addict. and he would switch between his inferior and superior roles. big mess, really. i should have left him years ago.
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jun-03-06 03:58 PM
Response to Reply #7
9. Aren't the sly misogynists the worst?
By the time you realize what you've been associating with, it's usually far later than you would like it to be. The worst thing about that to me is that they lead such externally "normal" lives; it's hard for employers, coworkers, and many friends (usually the male ones) to know about that aspect of their psychological make up, which makes it harder for those of us trying to stay the fuck away from jerks like that, too.
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