I post 1,000 posts a month on DU and I'm more liberal than you.

What I do in my *real* life is of no importance.

Did I mention that one time I berated a minimum-wage employee at a convenience store because the pump was out of gas? I had to drive my SUV across town to fill 'er up! Real liberal of me, wasn't it!

See--you don't have to *do anything* to be liberal--I say I'm more liberal than you, so that means I am.

And don't ask me to define what being a liberal means, because I'll only issue personal attacks at you.

:)

What'd I miss?

:evilgrin: (memo to mods...just teasing my buddy)

freeperella.

;)))))))

:hi:

:D :hi:

I drive an SUV and smoke everything and my liberal credentials are unshakable so if I post the rare 55,000 contrarian opinions about everything under the sun...just you nevermind :D

and isn't THAT what matters?

:hug: :7

:thumbsup:

:think: :crazy:

The frog ROCKS. He makes my day. And you know what? I think he's a conservative. Something about those teeth.

He's thinking about doing an armed lilypad invasion so that he can get free dental care while in prison. :silly:

(whatever the hell that means!)


Ribbit.

You never know which one is full of shit! :D

:)

I need a cigarette ...............

want some A1 with that cig? :hi:

and then I stuff it with 10W40.

So far, so good.

(LOVE THAT FROG!)

After all, don't you think I'm looking pretty spiffy for 27?

:rofl:

Nike diapers count?

Just wondering .............

:)

:P

:P

...Al Gore. Talk about a kid with liberal priorities! :hi:

:spray: :rofl:

:shrug:

It doesn't matter what you DO. You see, just tell people that you are liberal, and voila! You are!!

I'm still wondering where the chart is posted that will clear it all up for us.

You know, the chart that catalogs where we shop, what we drive, and what we eat, smoke, wear and shit.

I shit flowers, by the way, so that makes me more liberal. I'm doing gooder things for the environment.

Flowers fall out of the exhaust pipes on my SUV as I drive around town.

:D

in case you didn't know, those flowers will shrivel up and die since they aren't road-planted.

I can forgive you for not knowing.

But you should try the ultimate exhaust system, designed exxxspecially by me.

New Wheezy-free Biodegradable Cancer-healing Dryer Sheets.

Strap one to your exhaust pipe(s) today and be healed!

:spray: :rofl:

:thumbsup:

:evilgrin: :popcorn:

I say I'm a real big liberal, so I am! Period. End of discussion. IF you question me about my beliefs, I'll dustroll you.

:)

full head of hair...teeth, yes teeth must be uber liberal. Now, is there anyone MORE liberal than you?

I guess I'm a Freeper then? Damn. :silly:

I don't care if you do volunteer work in a homeless shelter, an AID hospise, or a pet shelter.

Did I mention that *I* drive an SUV? I'm more liberal than you.

See, to be a true bona fide liberal, you have to do things that might be misconstrued as unliberal, so that you can proclaim your liberalism. Convoluted, I know. Don't ask me to clarify. I'm more liberal than you, by divine right.

:D

You better not be seen talking to me. I moved to Wales and am a coward since I don't live in America anymore. :patriot:

hanging out with all of those European liberals--but if you don't drive an SUV and shop at Wartmart, you aren't as liberal as me. Does Wales have a Walmart? Need to know, in case I ever visit there!

But they have disguised the name to keep the European Liberals from figuring them out. They call them ASDA here. Psssssssssst...........they sell liquor in them.......even on Sunday.

so that my house can be as liberal as I am. Do they have those there?

:toast:

BTW, your house can only be truely Liberal if you have a Kerry Shrine in your den.

Didn't even have to tape it together...the shelac holds it just find.

Don't you see that this dichotomy is what makes me a true big liberal?

:o

You are depleting the Ozone Layer. :popcorn:

You are depleting the Ozone Layer. :popcorn:

:toast:

ASDA(Walmart) sells it cheap don't ya know?

Like this:

:hi:

Free your mind and the trunk will

* 8 *

American Justice? Sure, so why is an attorney getting away with tampering with court documents even though he “inadvertently” filed three pages of emails detailing what was done with the court.

See for yourself: http://www.maximumadvocacy.com/Court_records.html, look on pages 25-27 of document 64.

Unbelievable. Priceless. Hilarious, if it wasn’t so sad but true.

How’s your faith in the justice system?

That's LIBERAL!

take a liberal stance on the struggle to legalize Lonnie Anderson's hair. Instead, you bring her SUV into this. Define her SUV? Not until you take a stance on her hair.

who was friends with that dude who had anal sex in Deliverance. Or was that rape? Sex or rape? Oh shit, this could devolve into a serious discussion on a serious issue!

At any rate, Lonnie is a liberal and her hair doesn't need liberlizinating from me. Even if she did contribute to GW Bush, which I'm not saying she did or didn't, but such petty behaviors are of no consequence when we are talking about "true big liberals."

I can only arrive at the concussion that you support President Bush's mandate to jail Lonnie Anderson's hair. Don King is a huge contributor to republican causes. One of my favorite John & Yoko movies was "Rape:Part 2," though I never saw it.

:D

for providing a thread that brings a smile to my face, on a day when not too many do.

:toast:

if you don't know that much, I'm WAY more liberal than either of you!

:silly:

threads, but couldn't think of anything nearly as clever as yours

I was fuming when I read one in particular

most of the aye aye responses came from those who also took great pleasure in the non-stop McKinney bashing that continues to be such good sport here

and I love that frog....have sent it to many email ads

for it's tried and true.

Thank the thread gods for threads like that. It groups them all up in one place so that you can easily add them to your ignore list. :D

only seen on those threads, and they definitely do rate that, cause they really get me going, to no good end

they seem to be classic ECs, as well; NEVER provide specific answers when questioned about why they post the way they do; EVER

I have been eliminating the McKinney/punch/'fool'/smear-of-the-day threads now, whenever they pop up. total waste

Mind you, there are contentious threads at DU in which I regularly participate--I learn a lot from those.

But the grandstanding bullshit threads that are meant to infuriate...

:)

See! thanks for pointing that out, to all of the naysayers. My frog is green, ergo, I'm the biggest liberal on DU.

:)

Lemme roll you a green cigarette


Actually I'm typing with a Camel in my mouth, so I'll be the last person to argue about that little detail.

They sale plants there--so it's a green Walmart, right? Aaargh! Why am I asking you to validate my liberlishness! I am a liberal, and a big one to boot!

I'm very liberal in declaring people liberals. As long as they don't nag about my yacht, it's all fine with me. If they nag about my yacht, they are repukes of course...

Do you serve wine and caviar on it--bought at Walmart, of course? Do you entertain rich Republicans by sailing them around on the Mediterranean? YOU are ALMOST as liberal as I am.

You need no conscience to be a true, big liberal.

:hi:

:silly:

All REAL Liberals smoke pot don't they? :smoke:

and I've never even seen an SUV or a WalMart - can I still be a liberal?

you can call yourself one. I guess.

:P

claim at almost any politically leaning Message Board. Whoa! Nope, you are the most X for sure. No challenge from little ole' me. ;)

I'm a divine-right liberal. My liberalism is inherited, not achieved.

:silly:

He lives in the UK too. I think he may be a Socialist! :evilgrin:

There are still some Socialists left here, despite what Bliar would have you think.

I heard they are related to Coummunists.:silly:

Although I don't need to be validated by your silly support, DUers, where in the hell are my recs?

You're just jealous because you aren't as liberal as I am, pimps and hos.

:P

Can I be a Liberal in training now? :hippie:

Roll a doobie and light that mfer. Just roll down the window--I don't want my SUV to smell like potsmoke.

You can now be in my True Big Liberal club. I'll see if I can get Skinner to start a DU group for us.

:toast:

As long as you don't question me for my lifestyle choices and my divine-right liberalism, you can be in my club.

:toast:

You can stay, as long as you don't challenge my liberalism. If you do, I'll have you drawn and quartered like my favorite film star Mel Gibson, in that movie about that Scottish dude Bill Wallace.

:toast:

:(

It's what's in you heart and head that matters. :toast:

You're just a JERK who likes to shove your opinions on others and make others feel bad for not being as "liberal" as you are. HOW DARE YOU!!!

....Riiiiiiiiiiight.

:evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin:

You're a Liberal because your name says so. Good one.:thumbsup:

You don't get much more wild-eyed than me, because I say so. And I say everyone else is wrong. So there.

We'll just pat each other on the back for being liberals who indulge themselves in environment-wrecking, Republican-supporting behavior.

I even have a Bush poster in our clubhouse. Just so we can relish our paradoxical lifeways! :D

I have no desire to see two men "doing it." GROSS!!!

Does that make me ungay?

Riiight.

:spray: Thanks for the mems, WEL. :toast:

I can't relate to homos gays because I LIKE GUYS THANK YOU VERY MUCH, but HOW DARE YOU IMPLY THAT I'M HOMOPHOBIC??!!

Riiight. :eyes:

:rofl:

Right back atcha, MM :D :toast:

My junior college class whatched CRASH, and I'm more liberal than you, becuase more people can RELATE to CRASH. Name me one homo gay dude who was ever hurt for being a gay dude homosechual. Beside, the Geisha Girl movie was the best.

Riiight.

:rofl:

I completely forgot about "Geisha Girl."

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Um, American isn't a queer-hating homophobic county, HELLO? Got PROOF?

:rofl:

I want REAL PROOF.

Besides, he was only killed, not maimed or injured or anything.

:eyes: :banghead: :freak:

And since it's DU, I see appalling things on a near-daily basis.

Ahhh memories... :freak: about sums that whole encounter up.

Always good to cross paths with you - :toast:

:toast:

Its called shortining okay?

Also, all my sweatshop-made underwear comes from Target ONLY. No WalMart for me! Calling myself a liberal makes me feel good, so that's what I do.

BTW, it's also very liberal of me to not care one bit how "liberal" might be defined. It's my world, so it's my damn definition.

Get thee behind me, superliberal!!!

I shop at Sam's Club. Top that, pussy!

:rofl:

when I shop at Home Depot I use my ATM card from my CREDIT UNION. Big banks, my ass! Always hurting the little people.

I also refuse to have a crappy habit like smoking. That'll kill you! I use chewing tobacco instead. Second hand smoke might hurt others, but me spitting into a cup while I'm at dinner at Chik fil-A (owner's a good Christian fella) doesn't bother nobody.

I adopt children through Wendy's restaurants. I fight for feminists by donating money to adult entertainers at the local strip joint.

By driving my SUV, I am actually ensuring America's economic future by creating such a demand for gasoline that our powers-that-be will have no choice but to swich to ethanol in the very near future.

I'm a volunteer greeter at Walmart, where I hand out coupons for 10% off meals at the neighborhood Ruby Tuesday to homeless veterans.

Did I mention that I have an ornamental fish pond in my back yard?

Edited to add a :)

I show my blue side in all things I do as well. For example:

When I'm shooting exotic animals in canned hunts sponsored by the Safari Club, I sneer at the Bush-backing neocons with their NRA membership. Not me, not ever.

I enjoy the occasional whale steak. I eat it often when I'm on business in Japan (I work for Dell, and me and Mike Dell...best pals visit a few times a year). I'm only putting Heinz ketchup on it, though. Buy blue!!

I'll only buy fair-trade coffee, as a true liberal. I just hate having to take up 2 (two!!) handicapped spots at the indie cafe where I buy it. My aforementioned H2 doesn't fit in their little parking spaces. I laugh at what I call parking that's "Prius-sized."

As for a woman's right to choose, as a man, I really don't think I'm going to interject my opinion. I'm a liberal, and that's how I see it. I just hope I don't accidentally pick one of those gals while I'm trying to snipe the abortion clinic doc.

I am....unfortunately....WAY less liberal than either one of you.

:shrug:

for real changes for real people.

That's just liberal fluff. To be a true big liberal, you have to do at least one thing people would consider conservative or careless, so that you can trumpet your dichotomy, which makes you all the more liberal.

Does that make sense? Doesn't matter. What I say is what matters. Challenge my liberalism, and off with your head!

:hi:

I like red meat. I've shot a gun before. Uhhh....I like having a lawn. I wear leather (unfortunately not in the bedroom...I'm sure that would be the kicker). Umm...I keep my hair short.

Does that make me anymore liberal? :shrug:

:woohoo:

(They're both illegals! I am so damned liberal that I should be celebrated!)

OK, gotta run to Walmart to stock up on cleaning supplies.
But I'll be back later to rip apart anyone who tries to expose my unliberalness.

Ciao. (French word--I'm oh so liberal!)

because you want them to have a better life, and not so that you can pay them diddly squat and threaten to turn them in to the INS when they get uppity and ask for a half-day off a month. Good for you!:toast:

Paper or plastic?

Coke or Pepsi?

Is your big screen TV Fair Trade?

Who grinds the beans for your Double Non-Fat Soy Amaretto Half-Cap?

How many hours do you let your pre-schoolers use the computer?

Is your porn exploitation-free?

Do you smoke hemp or wear it?

How many things in your home RIGHT NOW are "Made In China"?

LOL LOLOL LOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLLOLOLLL:puke:

I have to hurry, though, because the wife needs cleaning supplies so that she can get this house up to par.

Paper or plastic? Plastic. Duh! And I don't recycle, so suck on that!

Coke or Pepsi? This is a trap, isn't it? I'll say RC Cola.

Is your big screen TV Fair Trade? I have a projection TV. Who cares.

Who grinds the beans for your Double Non-Fat Soy Amaretto Half-Cap? Huh?

How many hours do you let your pre-schoolers use the computer? Hah, he can't get on the computer, because I monopolize it to prove my liberalism on DU, of course! He sits in the corner chewing on rocks.

Is your porn exploitation-free? I only buy Hustler. Larry Flynt is god.

Do you smoke hemp or wear it? I smoke Marlboros. Do they sell hemp at Walmart? If so, I probably wear it.

How many things in your home RIGHT NOW are "Made In China"? Better question is: how many aren't? Well, if you consider my carport part of my house, ONE thing isn't, and that's my superduper SUV!!! That I drive!! So bite me!!! Pansy liberal!!!

:D

It's none of my business :toast:

We can only hope those are FREE-RANGE rocks the kids chewing on! :hi:

I drive pretty fast, but I went to Crawford twice.

I will NEVER set foot in a Wal-Mart, but I have have a separate room in the house just for listening to music.

We live in the country and don't care to have neighbors close by, but i would drive halfway across the country if someone I cared about on this board needed my help.

I'm not really overly fond of kids, but I won't kill animals to eat them.

I'm a schizophrenic. I am not.

Geez, I need help.

You're a pseudoliberal, not a true big liberal, and you can't be in my club.

(In all honestly, you sound a lot like me. :-) )

I need to know.

Dammit, I need to know.

"You can sit here in the waiting room, or you can wait there in the sitting room..."

Really! :eyes:

:)

I haul things wherever I go and all the roads are bumpy where I live and how else can I get my filthy obnoxious family to Wal-Mart? And HOW DARE YOU ask why I own an SUV! I'm totally liberal!

And I smoke because I'm addicted, okay? I hate it! Also, I enjoy it! And HOW DARE YOU ask why I smoke! It's because I enjoy it, hate it, can't stop, and am curiously proud of it for reasons I can't quite admit to myself!

And I eat steak! I eat it because it's juicy! And HOW DARE YOU ask why I eat steak! I'm as liberal as they come!

And I HAVE TO SHOP AT WAL-MART! I have absolutely no choice! It's the only store within walking distance, which doesn't matter because I drive there in my SUV, but that's beside the point! The point is, HOW DARE YOU ask why I shop at Wal-Mart in a thread I started myself by announcing that I shop at Wal-MArt, which I do because I'm so liberal, and none of this is any of your business. And HOW DARE YOU ask?

Oh, wait... you didn't ask?

You know, to truly be liberal, you HAVE to indulge in environment-wrecking, Republican supporting behavior, because that proves that your open-minded, right?

That is what true liberalism is all about. Challenge me, and I'll poop in your corn flakes!!!

(I can't believe I typed that. But this is a gloves-down liberal-off, after all!)

Seriously, I have no response--I'm trying to catch my breath-laughing out loud, scared the cat. :D

:spray: :rofl:

That's not very liberal.

:applause:

I bow before your perfection. Couldn't top that if I tried!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Hilarious. Thank you.

and I shop at WalMart occasionally. I always vote Democrat and my dad was in the mechanics union. I drink, smoke everything and have danced on a bar.

I still bow before your mighty liberalness, Maddy.

I'm more liberal than you!

:P

:bounce:

Call me a stupid liberal but I'm not getting the reference...

:eyes:

wants to be one. I blame Bush. ;)

:D

I'm a scrapbook-making, subdivision-living, minivan-driving, Sunday School-teaching red stater.

I'm probably not a liberal at all, am I?

Just hoping for my own personalized attack. :crazy:

:rofl:

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