HaHa! CLINTON Got A BLOWJOB! by the writer of KEEP YOUR JESUS Off My PENIS

You also need to let everyone know that Eric Schwartz needs a roommate in Manhattan next month:


<snip>
I hope this finds you well.

First of all, I'd like to thank all of those who came out for the recording of Redder Than Ever, which came out swimmingly. It includes my latest anti-Bush effort "Clinton Got A Blowjob," which is about, of course, our current commander in grief. If I can get a thousand people at a folk festival singing "Clinton Got A Blowjob" Over and over again, well, it might be worth a listen. Defnitely the sequel to "Keep Jesus Off My Penis."

In fact, here's the song.

www.ericschwartz.com/ClintonBJ.mp3

Why am I giving it away? First of all, if I don't, someone else will.
Second, it's a little gift for those who are kind enough to receive my occasional missives.
Third, it's pretty damn FUN. Trust me.
Fourth, this way, you might just be tempted to FORWARD THIS TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW, SOME OF WHOM MIGHT BE LOOKING FOR A ROOMMATE IN MANHATTAN FOR SEPTEMBER 1ST.

You see, I find myself in need of housing for September 1st and I'm going out of town mid-August so I need a room by then. I spend too much out of town to be spending 2000+ a month for my own place, so roommate time it is.
So, please send this far and wide to anyone who might appreciate the song.
And if you are reading this and have a room in Manhattan that'll need filling on the aforementioned date, please let me know.
Wahoo, take care, and thank you kindly for your time.

Eric Schwartz

ps: Redder Than Ever will be available soon on Itunes, CDBaby and CDFreedom. Look out for it. Or sign up on my mailing list to receive announcement of its arrival.
pps: I am accepting offers from those who'd like a nice guy like me to live in their NYC apt free and sing them songs every now and then.
ppps: If you are offended by the fact that "Mommy, what's a blowjob?" was heard on at least three occasions at said folk festival, perhaps we're not a suitable match.
pppps: If you were AT Falcon Ridge, welcome and thanks for joining.

www.ericschwartz.com
eric@ericschwartz.com
or call me at 212-604-4668. It's a machine but I'll get it.

Well, how old is he?

Buy them from CDBaby!


ERIC SCHWARTZ: pleading the first: songs my mother hates
Zappa meets Lehrer Meets Weird Al Meets topics like Bill Clinton, Matthew Shepherd, the Peanuts and Weed
http://cdbaby.com/cd/schwartz2

ERIC SCHWARTZ: self-bootleg
Lenny Bruce, Barry Manilow, Weird Al, Frank Zappa, John Denver, Kinky Friedman Chet Baker and Woody Allen had their way with Eric's mother, Lil Kim.
http://cdbaby.com/cd/schwartz4

ERIC SCHWARTZ: sunday blue
"Sunday Blue" is the antidote to "Pleading the First"...Jazz-folk-country mellow music for a Sunday Morning
http://cdbaby.com/cd/schwartz3

ERIC SCHWARTZ: that's how it's gonna be
James Taylor and Wierd Al have a love child (Godfathered by Elvis Costello and Stephen Sondheim) and turn him loose on the streets of New York.
http://cdbaby.com/cd/schwartz

And while you're on CDBaby, also buy:


THREE WEIRD SISTERS: hair of the frog
The second release from the Atlanta-based Three Weird Sisters, Hair Of the Frog continues their tradition of tight vocal harmonies woven throughout eclectic topics and a unique acoustic folk style.
http://cdbaby.com/cd/3weirdsis2


THREE WEIRD SISTERS: rite the first time
Folk with a Celtic and even Bluegrass flavor, Rite the First Time swings from the sublime to the silly and from the material to the spiritual in eclectic mixes of harmonic vocals and acoustic instruments (harp, guitar, bodhran, and upright bass).
http://cdbaby.com/cd/3weirdsis

He's a genius!

Damn that's good.:D

very well!

:applause:

:rofl:

But I love the end the best.........

I needed a good laugh. Thanks!:rofl:

Have had a mad crush on him since "Jesus" :)

Great song

:applause:

http://www.atomfilms.com/contentPlay/videoAutoPlay.jsp?id=jesus_off



:rofl: :rofl:


Thanks for the introduction to Eric!!


Keep Your Jesus Off My Penis
©2004 Eric Schwartz


Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
You can keep the virgin mother
And the resurrection too
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you

Well I'm frickin' sick and tired
Of turning on the news
And seeing the religious right's
Ungodly fight to take our right to choose
When to bear our children
Who to love and how
Education and protection
If we're just practicing for now
So dubya look obey a book
If that's what works for you
But I don't tell you how to pray
So don't tell me how to screw

Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
You can keep the virgin mother
And the resurrection too
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you

So you’re screaming bloody murder
'Bout the taliban regime
For subjugating women
And being too extreme
And basing legislation
On some ancient holy book
Does that sound a bit familiar?
Here's a mirror, have a look

And as for the ten commandments
They need one more at least
Thou shall never cover up
The acts of pervert priests
How'd they let that happen
Unless they just abhor us
Well anyway it adds
Another layer to the chorus

Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
You can keep the virgin mother
And the resurrection too
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you

So you'll execute a person
And protect a single cell
But mercy-kill the terminally ill
And you're goin' straight to hell
I don't know much about
The word of God
Far be it from me
But I can tell you what it ain't
Hypochristianity

I am not anti-Christian
Before you grab a rope
There is beauty in religion
And joy and love and hope
We're all looking for an answer
Some colossal cosmic cause
But who the fuck are you
To turn your views into my laws?
It's just believers in the bible
That would have abortion banned
Anti-choice agnostics?
I could count’em on one hand
And as for killing babies
I have but one retort
If someone raped your daughter George
You'd beg her to abort

And if some young girl from your church
Shows up with child or some infection
‘Cuz you taught her what a horrid sin
It was to use protection
One day you'll face the pearly gates
And whatchu gonna say
When that long-haired Jewish peacenick
Sends your ass the other way sayin’

Keep your Jesus off my penis
Keep your bible off my balls
Keep your prayers out of my ears
And your crosses off my walls
I've had it up to here
With all the biblibile you spew
Keep your Jesus off my penis
(at least that's what I would do)
Keep your Jesus off my penis
I'll keep my penis off of you
That's if'n you want me to

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Thanks for posting it.

met him at Kerrville
friend of my daughter's and her husband
all fabulous folk musicians

he was her at our daughter's wedding
a 4-day affair with camping and music all night

anniversary party every year in october
hope to see you then, eric
if you're watching
I know you've already been invited

DrT