Please critique my Condi Rice LTTE (re: 9/11 perjury)

Comments & editing suggestions wanted:
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The White House must be quietly thanking Mark Foley for the pedophilia scandal timing. If not for Foley, we might be talking about how Condoleezza Rice has completely lost what was left of her credibility. The debate would be if perjury charges are justified regarding her 9/11 Commission testimony and if she was also criminally negligent.

In her testimony to the 9/11 Commission, Rice said that if they had known an attack was coming, they would have, "moved heaven and earth" to stop it.

In reality, Dr. Rice did nothing to stop 9/11.

On July 10, 2001, the two top CIA people, George Tenet and J. Cofer Black, urgently warned her, Attorney General John Ashcroft and Defense Secretary Rumsfeld that a terror attack was imminent. Black even said, "The only thing we didn't do was pull the trigger to the gun we were holding to her head."

So serious was this warning that Ashcroft switched from flying commercial aircraft to private chartered ones.

Though she first denied the meeting, Rice now says she cannot recall the details.

If she does not step down for perjury, Dr. Rice should at least have the shame to step down for her incompetence.

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link to CBS story on Ashcroft from July of 2001 - http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2001/07/26/national/main303601.shtml

The White House must be quietly thanking Mark Foley for the timing of the pedophilia scandal. If not for Foley, we might be talking about how Condoleezza Rice has completely lost what remained of her credibility. Along with the Foley scandal, we should be discussing whether perjury charges should be filed against Rice regarding her 9/11 Commission testimony and whether she was criminally negligent.
In her testimony to the 9/11 Commission, Rice said that if the administration had known an attack was coming, they would have, "moved heaven and earth" to stop it.
In reality, Secretary Rice did nothing to stop 9/11.
On July 10, 2001, the two top CIA officials, George Tenet and J. Cofer Black, urgently warned her, Attorney General John Ashcroft and Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld that a terror attack was imminent. Black even said, "The only thing we didn't do was pull the trigger to the gun we were holding to her head."
So serious was this warning that Ashcroft switched from flying commercial aircraft to private chartered ones.
Though she first denied the meeting, Rice now says she cannot recall the details. If she does not step down for perjury, Rice should at least have the shame to step down for her incompetence.

I'm about due to have one in the hartford courant...

in in regard to your statement "... Condoleezza Rice has completely lost what was left of her credibility." IMHO, she never had the smallest iota of credibility to begin with. This latest denial on her part re: meeting with Tenet and Black on 10 July 2001 is just another one of her feeble attempts to lie her way out of accepting responsibility for 9/11. This woman is a pathological liar but a piss-poor one at that. Just listen to her voice ... when it trembles you can bet your ass she's lying like a rug. Of all the turds in the * misAdministration I hate and have the most contempt for her.

lying and ad-libbing to cover her ass. Her voice begins to quake and tremble and she sounds just like she is about to burst into tears from the stress of keeping up the charade.

And, most people outside of the United States would concur that she has none... but she has been a "golden girl" in the media for the past few years and has been almost immune to criticism.

scratch that, all of DU probably agrees with you on her having no credibility.

;)

Strong to the finish, doncha know!

:P

:rofl:

Comments: I changed "quietly" to "secretly" because it implies a greater sense of skullduggery and deception. I changed "pedophilia scandal" to "sex scandal," because some people might not consider the pages to be sufficiently young to qualify as "pedophilia," and if that charge is disputed then it distracts from the rest of your argument. I changed "if not for Foley" to "if not for Foley's predatory antics" because it highlights his wrongdoing and reinforces the creepiness of his methods. Also, the use of "predator" resonates with NBC's endlessly ongoinging "To Catch a Predator" series.

I changed "whether perjury charges should be filed against Rice" to "whether Rice is guilty of perjury," because it's more immediate and, I think, packs more of a punch. The word "guilty" is powerful even if it's only hypothetical (at this point). I think that you can drop the bit about "criminally negligent" because it seems too vague and metaphorical, especially since you don't explicitly return to it in the piece.

I used "shame-induced resignation" because it plays well against your closing paragraph (see below).





Comments: I think that it's useful to name the Bush administration here, rather than refer simply to "they," because you implicate the rest of Bushco. You can eliminate the closing statement ("In reality, Dr. Rice...") because it's obvious from what comes next, and the passage about Black and Tenet packs more punch if it follows immediately.





Comments: "top CIA people" is too colloquial; it's enough to name the two men and proceed from there. Change "terror" to "terrorist," because they're two different things, and because Bushco tries to equate them whenever possible. Remove the quote about the gun to the head, because it comes across a trifle too literal in this context, and it may be perceived as a vague threat from a ranting Liberal. It's sufficient to underscore that the warning was clear--clear enough to scare Ashcroft into taking private flights!





Comments: I feel that it's useful to reiterate that she changed her story, since we know how Conservatives love the "flip-flopper" label. And I think that "shame" as a verb is stronger here than as a direct object. Also, "step down" is a bit tepid, especially if we can use "shame" and "resign" to echo Foley's "shame-induced resignation" mentioned above.

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It's a good LTTE in any case. You are free to adopt or ignore any of my suggestions with no obligation express or implied.

Good luck!

some excellent ideas.