2 kids left at home -- parents partied in Las Vegas.

This is the first entry in my "What the hell is the matter with these people?" contest for 2006

For those of you who aren't familiar with the area, San Ramon is middle class and upper middle class. The parents are professionals - a plumber and a dentist and clearly they had enough money to board the puppies. I can't imagine what would possess them to leave a ten year old in charge for four days. When the cops tried to call them using the emergency numbers that they had left with the boys, it took hours before they finally reached them.

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2006/01/05/MNGL8GHMUM1.DTL

Henry K. Lee, Chronicle Staff Writer
Thursday, January 5, 2006

who was concerned enough to call. Bet she knows how to take care of them.

Wow. Simply amazing and shameful. Having a sitter for puppies but not for the kids? WTF is wrong?

Those people are fucking nuts.

Some people are just missing a few screws.

I panic when I leave my 14-year-old in charge for a half hour! I hope grandma kicks some sense into her daughter.

Thankfully the maternal grandmother raised Cain. She has the boys in her custody now.

Still -- I hope that grandma kicks someone's ass. Damn.

even if my mother was just going to the store down the road she wouldn't leave us a lone. We didn't start staying home by ourselves until I was in about seventh/eighth grade.

bit of money doing it, starting at that age. Maybe you need to think about loosening the apron strings a bit (unless your younger children have some major behavioral issues, autism etc. that the 14 yr-old is incapable of dealing with.)

My 5-year-old suffers from asthma. It doesn't attack her too often, but when it does it's quick and scary.

Outside of that, I believe you are right. I do need to lighten up a bit. My 14-year-old has attended sitter classes offered through the local fire department. She's probably more competent than my mother-in-law if there was an emergency. I think it is very difficult for me to let go. I'll try harder & thanks for the advice. :)

take offense - glad that you didn't. I do think that with all the hoopla in the past few decades with pics of missing kids on milk cartons, etc. some parents (but definitely **NOT** the let's-leave-a-10-year-old-in-charge-of-an-autistic-5-yr-old-for-five-days couple) have become too paranoid. Kids do need to gradually develop independence. I have a sister who really babies her 11-year-old. My niece is very clingy and immature and can hardly stand to be away from my sister; I really think that if they don't get some professional help soon, my niece is going to have some serious problems.

But made sure the dogs had a sitter.

They don't want the kids. Take 'em.

and it was no fun. My parents needed a break away from him and the whole scene. They'd have him in some place being taken care of while the other 2 of us were left at home alone. They could not afford a babysitter. That is reality and it is much worse now as the cut away at aid for children that are ill, etc.

Sad isn't it?

:( I have a younger cousin who is quite strange. He's pretty hyperactive and now takes medicine for it to help him calm down and they think he has a slight case of autism. He's very smart though and is in pre-kindergarten but he can read at a second grade level. :crazy:

and my parents spent all of their money getting him to be a member of society which actually worked. However, it was no fun for the rest of the family, believe me. He tried to kill me when I was 15 years old. He died about 2 years ago sadly. He didn't remember his past luckily.

:kick:

such situations and has had such a system for more than 20 years. The U.S. is SO pathetically behind the rest of the "civilized" world.
In so many areas we rank with third world nations.

My father had three jobs; Mother worked full-time. So there were plenty of times that we were "home alone". If we told anyone about it we'd get our asses kicked and we knew it so we did not say a word. It seemed ok to us and we had no idea that there was anything wrong with it at that time.

Now it is a big deal.

It is pathetic that this country has no means to help families like this. In the end, the ones that pay the price are those like myself raised in such dysfunctional homes.

:kick:

The problem may be that this was a couple with enough money to pay for a kennel AND a 4 day trip to Vegas. Respite care programs are usually saved for people with limited resources. It doesn't sound like this dentist/plumber two earner family are in the limited resources category. Don't blame their stupidity on a lack of services. In fact, come to think of it, my niece provided services for a family's autistic child for a couple of years, paid by the state. And that was Arkansas.

But only for the dogs?

Dad doesn't want his disappointing old family.

nor dog sitters, etc.

There was NO sitters for us. The autistic brother I mention was the youngest of the lot of us.

:kick:

My parents did this all of the time - took off and left my brother & I alone at home with no one around. It was just fine with us being we hated the babysittter (aka cook from hell). :evilgrin:

:kick:

Making laughs about this is sad.

I'm not making a joke about it, it is reality for many out there.

This was c. 1960 when no one seemed to particularly care. It was "shut up and don't tell anyone about it".

We did not care.

:kick:

vasectomy/tubes tied and no police nazis snooping around. No nasty grandmothers
and a lot of money saved in a tough economy where kids cost a mint.

No kids, no problem. To have children is to join the working poor by spending
a life's wage on childcare, shoes, medical and whatnot so that the teenager can
flip you off and walk out the door after crashing your car.

When economics is the only force in the universe, there will be no children.
God bless the power of mistakes, infatuation, feremones and naked flesh.

You know that's what Rush will say...

:mad:

In fact I had to cook and care for the autistic brother, as well as spend hours teaching him to read and write every night! Oh yeah, life was great fun at home and they wondered why I moved out never to return at 17.

:kick:

Sure, a 10 year old can muddle through and nobody dies. It sucks to be the 10 year old however. When your parents have no choice because of economics, it's one thing. It's quite another when they couldn't even be bothered to hire someone to stay overnight with them but they boarded the puppies.

The boys were told not to answer the door. When the cops came by to check after the grandmother's call, they knocked and knocked and the boys didn't respond. The cops went around to the back and entered through an UNLOCKED patio door. Gee, I guess the 10 year old wasn't told explicitly to keep all the doors locked.

Say, if the five-year-old has gotten to a knife while his brother was in the bathroom, could you imagine the mindfuck that would be for that child? Some part of him would likely always blame himself for his brother's death.

while he went out to play during the day Saturday. This is a good example of the judgement skills of an average 10 year-old.

That's why I said a kid CAN muddle through without anybody dying -- it's just not a good idea for so many reasons.

The other aspect of this story is the parents left when the weather forecast included a huge storm with high winds followed by a second smaller storm with little let-up. Projections of spot flooding and tree limbs and tree downing were everywhere in the news. I still don't get how they justified leaving them alone. There were no nearby family members to check in either.

Most of the strip casinos in Las Vegas are fully equipped for day care for kiddies and even in those that aren't, having the kids unattended in your hotel room would be a better plan than leaving them alone hundreds of miles away.

They took us on one vacation I remember and they left us at the motel for the night, but not OVERNIGHT. Just about 8 hrs. or so if I remember right.

And yeah, it was not fun at 10 having to do all of that but I did not resent it because I loved my brother even though he was crazier than hell too much of the time.

He managed to get a job and worked very hard. He died of cancer in 2004 at the age of 47 years. Very sad it was and I loved him despite all of the horrors I witnessed growing up.

My parents did THE BEST THEY COULD. May God bless them.

I have NO resentment. I know that they did all they could and sometimes, even the best you can do is not enough in the eyes of others. Let them wear the shoes first is what I say, then judge.

However, in the case of these people in Las Vegas with the dogs in a kennel, etc. - an entirely different situation and yeah, what about grandma? I had a grandmother too, but she died in 1972 of what is now called Alzheimer's disease (well they didn't call it THAT then) and she did what she could in the earlier years of her life for my late brother, like send money to my Dad for cab fare so my brother could go to that pricey EH (educational handicapped) school and oh yes, he was in a home for awhile too where he was abused horribly.

That is what they called it then, an MR (mentally retarded) and and EH kid. Jesus, how sad really in retrospect. I often wonder if all of the drugs they were using on him may have contributed to his untimely death of cancer. :shrug: The whole thing in retrospect makes me feel very sad and also sick. :( It was a living hell for all involved.

:kick:

who were 7 and 4. At least a few overnights that I recall; I checked in with my grandparents who lived nearby by telephone, but they were not able to physically stay with us, nor were we allowed to bunk in their retirement community. This was in the mid 80s, so not all that long ago. I also babysat every afternoon and from the time I was 13, I had an afternoon job looking after kids from the neighborhood. (And to the mother with the 14 year old that she doesn't leave at home.... let zer grow up, would you? 14 is old enough to be left alone - and to take care of others.)

For me, the autism is the limiting issue - that child needed special care that no sibling, however loving and responsible, can provide. My sisters were thankfully neurologically normal, and while there are times I could have locked them in the closet, they were mostly good kids.

clued in to the fact that dad and his new wifey don't give two shits about him and his brother.

:cry: :cry: