Thrown Object Knocks Out Santa

more: http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8TKLC3G1&show_article=1

Thrown Object Knocks Out Santa

Dec 19 12:31 PM US/Eastern

‘Pretty Much Cold-cocked Him’


SPOKANE, Wash. (AP) - A man dressed as Santa Claus was knocked unconscious by a thrown object that hit his face while he was riding on the back of a truck decorated as a sleigh.
Kevin Smith says he never saw what hit him Saturday. Whatever it was, it broke his nose and gave him a concussion and two black eyes.

"One second I was up there waving to people, and the next minute I wasn't," Smith said.

He was taking part in Santa Run, sponsored by the firefighters union, which features off-duty firefighters who dress up as Santa and ride through residential areas handing out candy to children.

Santa's fair game.

Time for Billo to ride! Ride like the wind, Billo!

Police in the Brazilian city of Rio fervently denied reports leaking out of its intelligence bureau that Santa Claus has been killed in a fly-by shooting while escaping CIA pursuers near the city’s most poverty-stricken slum, Favela Wenceslaus, not “Nova Mare” as erroneously reported.

Britain’s BBC news reportedly has joined in a cover-up (see related story immediately following this exclusive report) to spare the world’s children the devastating news of Mr. Claus’ demise. A spokesman for the BBC, Sir Staff Upperlipp denied the respected news organ had covered up the story. “We stand behind our reporting that Mr. Claus’ helicopter was the target of gunmen but escaped the tragedy now being circulated by scurrilous agents of unnamed news organizations.” He declined to confirm that Sir Rupert Murdoch had a hand in the news leaks.

Claus, who would have celebrated his 359th birthday December 18, is the well-known beloved bringer of gifts to the world’s Christian children. The resident of the Santa Barbara area and Running Springs, both in southern California, abandoned his South Pole dwellings several years ago when early symptoms of global warming resulted in the deaths of several reindeer, including the fabled “Rudolph”, whose congenitally deformed proboscis glowed from the effects of nuclear radiation ingested whilst traversing the Curie residence in southern Paris in the 19th century. In recent years, Mr. Claus has relied on gaily decorated helicopters to traverse his global rounds.

In Washington, DC, Unitedstatesian President G. W. “Chimpy” Bush, denied Claus had suffered extraordinary rendition owing to Claus’ infiltration of the White House, where lumps of coal were discovered in knitted containers hung carefully from the Oval Office fireplace. “We do not waterboard,” the President stated in highly strident voice. “When someone infiltrates so deeply into our most sacred places, we must rely upon perfrudnly persuasives measures to get at the truth.”

U.S. Attorney General Mukasey clarifed the U.S. role as “necessary” to learn how the red-robed philanthropist gained intimate knowledge of world sleeping habits, and Claus’ threat of “coming to town”. He denied the bearded intruder had been observed on surveillance tapes kissing Mrs. Bush beneath the official holiday tree was the real reason for Claus’ detention in Guantanamo.


http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7150372.stm

Drug traffickers in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, have opened fire on a helicopter carrying a Santa Claus to one of the city's shanty towns. No one was hurt and it is thought the gunmen believed the helicopter belonged to the police.

The helicopter was taking an actor dressed as Santa Claus to a Christmas party in the favela of Nova Mare when it came under fire. Two bullet holes were found in the fuselage when it returned to base.

probably a Bush supporter who got his jollies throwing a rock or something at Santa.

"Who you calling a HO, Santa? :evilgrin: