Gender Identity 101

Since there is so much ignorance going around about trans people, I figured I'd share this link with you:

http://sagatucson.org/saga/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=42&Itemid=94

One of the things that stuck out:



Really, how hard can it be?

I've recently become acquainted with a TG person and that site looks very helpful.

I always try to refer to people as whatever gender that want to be. I figure that such a lifestyle must be hard enough without one more person being a dick to you. At the same time, I'm not sure how I would refer to a transsexual who really wasn't committed to the lifestyle. If, let's say, a man who lived as a man but wanted to be called a women came along, I'd be much less charitable in going along with it.

I'll assume this thread was inspired by the last thread about the pregnant "man". Despite her seeming commitment to being a man, she has more or less rejected that identity by getting pregnant, going on Oprah, and announcing it to the world. I'll assume her goal was to raise transsexual awareness, in which case she succeeded. She also made it clear she not only isn't a he, but isn't committed to being one.

I'm at an impasse. He's a she, but she wants to be called a he, but he wants to be a she for pregnancy. Even that Dr. Suessesque rhyme isn't helping me decide how to call this one.

how hard is that?

What you think about it is interesting for you, but has nothing to do with calling the person by the gender they prefer to be called by.

He is doing something that he is uniquely capable of for the love of his family. He and his wife want to have a child, a biological child of their own. His wife is not able to carry a baby. BUT, he can. It wasn't a whim, and I have no doubt that it took a lot of soul searching for him to be at peace with the decision. He spent 2 years off of testosterone before attempting to conceive. Can you imagine the fear he must have been dealing with during that time? The desire for a biological child of a union is normal, he's just in a unique position to be able to help out a lot more than most husbands. The desire for a child is NOT uniquely female.

One could argue that there are other options, such as surrogacy or adoption, but, sad to say, adoption most likely ISN'T an option due to bias. Not to mention both can be prohibitively expensive.

HIS commitment to being a man is not debatable. Your continual references to him as "she" is insulting to transpeople everywhere. His commitment to becoming a father is quite evident and very strong.

And the ignorance and inappropriate behavior shows up in some of the most TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE places...oh, the story I could tell; suffice it to say: celebrating ugly disrespect with one surgical cut.

Here's a clue: YOU DESIGN IT; WE CAN BAKE IT

:puke: a lot!

Now I can see how a person may commit a faux pas at an initial meeting, when they don't know that a person is trans-gendered. But if that person tells them they prefer one pronoun over the other, it shouldn't be difficult to abide by their wishes. Sort of like a woman requesting to be called by the title "Mrs." rather than "Ms"--something I run into a lot in the course of my business, which is in a conservative part of the country. Goes against my feminist ideas, but if I insist on the "Ms", it shows disrespect to another and is rude.

because a man did not get preg

You'd think a progressive would at least know better than to refer to a human being as "it".

Ugh.