Barack Lights 'Em Up

{satire}


Sept. 9 -- Alarmed by his alarmed supporters on the internet, Barack Obama today vowed to put aside the strategy which has propelled his record-breaking candidacy to a couple of states away from the presidency and to spend the rest of the election mindlessly ripping into the "murderous bastards" who dared to run against him and their "stupid lackey" supporters.

"How stupid can you Americans be?" Obama shouted to an intimate crowd gathered together in this battleground state to hear him speak. "We all know the American voter is the stupidest voter on earth. Collectively, you are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it."

"Besides, you elected the most dangerous man on the earth . . . twice," he said. 'I'll be damned if I'm just going to let that go. I'm pissed off royal and I just don't give a shit.

Pulling back a curtain on stage, Obama walked up to a pair of paper mache' effigies of McCain and Palin, lit them on fire, and began singing the chorus of Arrested Development's "Revolution" at the top of his lungs as he beat them with a large pole.

Unimpressed by his display, many in the audience later said they thought Sen. Obama could have been more threatening in his remarks. "We didn't hear anything from Mr. Obama about keelhauling or disemboweling," said Marcus Gregory, an attendee. "I just don't think there's going to be any change at all without disemboweling," he said.

Another Obama supporter who attending the gathering said she's still inclined to vote for the Democratic ticket in November but she's still uneasy about the confidence the senator expressed in the judgment of the American people, earlier in the campaign. "I didn't realize just how stupid I was until today," she said. "Barack Obama has made me realize that I may well be just too dumb to vote at all."

Time will tell.

Funny how people don't think through what would happen if they got what they want.

Instant gratification is not going to win an election!

yeah

I wonder if he ever hears the cries of the impatient!

Good post Bigtree. Although I wouldn't mind seeing Clinton or Dodd burn some effigy's ;)

That's really good.

Sadly, I think some people actually want the disemboweling.

Especially after the chicken little day we had today. Thanks :toast:

Pulling back a curtain on stage, Obama walked up to a pair of paper mache' effigies of McCain and Palin, lit them on fire, and began singing the chorus of Arrested Development's "Revolution" at the top of his lungs as he beat them with a large pole.

That's quality satire, there. And "Revolution" used to be my SONG back in the day!

((humming)) "All my people say -- Revolution! All my brothers say -- Revolution! All my sisters say -- Revolution! Heyyyyy!!!" :headbang: