Your favorite rant of all time?

Here's mine...

Hey. If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is. Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where's the Tylenol?

"ha, ha, ha, DU, fooled you! I'm a <fill in the blank neo-con piss for brains> and I've p3wned you for the last <fill in the time>!"

Kamikaze runs are entertaining. Especially when the person in question has been on my "list" for <fill in the time>.

:hi:

"50,000 soldiers! Can you dig it???"

you can find it on youtube by doing a search "don't work for the nsa" and i think it's the classic rant

glengarry glen ross is pretty rant-a-licious too !

Joy Williams, "The Case Against Babies"

http://www.raleighnokidding.com/articles/granta99.html

Gore Vidal, "Monotheism and Its Discontents"

http://www.isebrand.com/Gore_Vidal_Monotheism_1992.htm

his rant about soy milk still makes me laugh. :rofl: