There's a psychological/emotional element that no one is discussing here

First let me apologize for not being around much. I've had a crazy deadline schedule and lots of personal shit going on.

Re: all the let those high risk borrowers hang out to dry posts. I'm finding it somewhat curious/intersting since I'm in the enviable position of having bought my house ten years ago. A small, undervalued house. Of course, it was a risk. I gambled that the area I bought in would grow. That the city would be forced to build a new school and my kids wouldn't be forced into an unfunded, under-performing school. I live in Alabama. We all know what that means, right? The gamble paid off. Sort of. I now live in the only elementary school district in our city with no projects or low income neighborhoods feeding into it. Of course, that means there's very little diversity in it. (Thank gawd my daughters have gone into middle school and a much different kind of school.) Some of you may even remember me ranting here when Kerry was running that my third grade daughter's teacher made some completely inappropriate remarks about him, including that he hated the military and would get more of our soldiers killed. Did I mention I'm a vet? And my husband was deployed at the time? Yeah, I was pissed. I yelled at him for a good hour and I requested him the next year for dd#2, because while I didn't change his politics, he did listen and he's a damned good teacher. My son will have him next year.

They're misguided, these right-wingers, but they aren't all evil.

I think the biggest problem, and this teacher is certainly indicative of it, is we've been convinced we're middle class. And we all want the things the American middle class is supposed to have. A home of our own. A car of our own. A credit card or two in case things get bad. There are several problems with this scenario. One, things are much worse for more of us than any of us anticipated. Two, damn. There's just so much thrown at us. I think most people know they're hurting, but they're in information overload too. They don't understand why Wall Street effects them. They're unsympathetic when their neighbors go into foreclosure. 'Cause they're middle class, right? And if their middle class neighbor is in trouble, then so are they right? No one wants to watch their dream crash down around their feet.

My family is going to make a very big chunk of change at the end of this year. But we're much worse off than when we bought the house ten years ago with a helluva lot less income. The income is about 2.5x more, but that includes book royalties I won't have next year and a re-enlistment bonus my husband won't have next year. (And um, other money. You'll see if you keep reading lol.) When you look at that difference it's a lot less money. Anyway and in the meantime, my husband who got out of the Army and went in the Guard and to work for the local PD, has had one cost of living raise in seven years. Seven years. For the people who protect you. And my husband is one of them. For those of you in Bama, he was the Dothan officer that was shot in the head in March when he walked into an armed robbery in progress. And for that sacrifice, getting himself, his rookie partner, and three hostages out of a hostile situation AND getting shot in the head, the city very generously paid him 66% disability. *sarcasm* Yeah. I'm bitter. And pissed. Really, really pissed. Thank Gawd we have a union. The only PD in Bama that does have a union. They made sure I could pay my bills and I love them. Obviously. But the idea that someone can get injured on the job (shot dammit!) and their employer owes them nothing, not even their full pay, burns my ass. And I don't think it's that the people don't care. There were complete strangers sending checks and giftcards to the PD for us, people we knew brought so much food I had to give some away. But it was immediate, ya know? It was all over the news. It made the news all over the state and my relatives in Atlanta even saw it on their news there. Hell, we even got mail from people my husband had arrested and/or write tickets too! It was crazy those first couple of months and this is not a small town.

The shooting...it taught me something about this man I married that I thought I knew, but I hadn't ever really felt ya know? He was an active duty Army MP for eight years, a city cop for seven. Fifteen years altogether in the Army. And I was in the Army with him, in the same MOS, so I know, I have an idea, what kind of soldier he is. But I got cards from the Atlanta PD, from Dekalb County (my home), from Miami, from all over Bama. From cons and cops and excons and regular people. I knew, but I didn't really know until this happened. He's one of the good guys. Really. He has a reputation for being fair to a fault. He has a reputation for giving second chances. It cost him a promotion until he got shot and then they couldn't justify promoting anyone over him. (If you've seen the video, you've seen why.) He walked into a situation that should have had casualties and didn't. But even knowing all this, his friends still give him hell for being a Democrat. Even knowing if they get hurt, worse than he was, they're looking at 66% disability, they'll vote Republican.

Then. Bad things come in threes, right? Gawd help my family if that is true. My three year old niece, my brother's only child, was diagnosed with cancer two weeks ago. She has neuroblastmo and it's bad. Stage four. It's in her brain, her stomach, and her bone marrow. Thank gawd, she's in Georgia and qualifies for Peach Care because while her parents make decent money, their employers don't have affordable insurance. I sent quite a bit of money to them to cover the time they've missed work over the last couple of weeks and several family members have pitched in, but it breaks my heart. My brother's daughter started chemo and he couldn't be there that day. He had to work. Not from loss of income, because we've all sent them money, but because they will fire him if he misses too much time. Seriously. These people just do not care.

Because they have been convinced they are middle class.

That can't be repeated enough.

Middle America thinks it is Middle Class!!! MIDDLE AMERICA AND MIDDLE CLASS IS NOT THE SAME THING!!!

My opinions are of course colored by my history. My mother is a liberal medical malpractice lawyer. My father is a Vietnam Vet who's father was a very well known Teamsters Organizer in the South during and after WWII. My husband was born in America but raised by a single mother in Ireland, in an environment that was very unsympathetic to single mothers. He grew up dirt poor and I grew up upper middle class America in the 80's. The amazing thing is I am a total cynic and he has hope.

Anyway, back to that first paragraph. We took a risk. Every financial decision entails a certain amount of risk. But there are calculated risks and completely stupid, I'm playing the game risks. I see the difference. I think there were a lot of people, certainly where I live, who were handed the first chance in generations to own their own porperty, Who were not in it to roll it over into something more. I think it's sad that those people are looking at losing the houses they gambled everything on so they can go back to the status quo...paying some rich white guy for the place they live in. You want to solve the mortgage crisis? I'm all for that. But don't ignore the social and emotional ramifications in the process.

Otoh, I'm finding so much to see hope in. Maybe I'm just Gen X and we're pessimistic and down as a generation? My daughters, who are almost 13 and 12, are so not. They are so smart and they are politically smart. They cut through the bs. I'd love to take credit for that, but I'm not sure I can. My 13yo is taking engineering (in an avg sized Bama public school system. Yeah. We're dumb.) and had it out with her teacher last week. Her argument? It makes more sense to make same sex marriage legal and tax it like we do any other marriage. She did NOT get that from me, but it is a nice argument. ;) She knows, intuitively, she can't can't counter the religious bs. But she is more than willing to hit these people in the pocketbook. Then her teacher told her she'd make a good lawyer or politician and she had some very derogotory statements to make. Again, not me. My mom is a lawyer lol! The thing that kills me though is she was nominated for student government. She asked the teacher to NOT put her on the ballet. She said she didn't think it made a difference and there was no point. She won anyway. That might be popularity, but she's kinda always been a nerdy/geeky kinda kid. I think it's a generational shift. Anyone who has read Strauss and Howe knows what I am talking about. Smart is starting to matter again.

So anyway, if you clicked on this post, thanks. We really have to remember that we aren't talking about faceless people. Should people have been better informed? Maybe. Did people make the best choices with the information they had available? I think most of them did. Should the working poor be punished because the rich define rich and avaricious? Hell no.

It has been a helluva a year, I have to say!

Blessings/wishes to all...

It's been bad, as you might imagine, but we're getting by. Thanks for thinking of us. :)

However, I think Republicans are ignorant, choose to be ignorant, and bang their chest with pride that they're ignorant.

I hate to agree. I really do. But. And I'm not suggesting the Dems are gonna win Bama anytime soon, but I do think, we're making some headway. Unfortunately, we're making that ground because we're hurting so bad. (As a country, not just the South and yes I see the problem with that.)

on the planet. I just haven't seen a people so willing to vote against their own good in every possible way and election. It's just too much. :(

That my girls, who are in middle school, had an election last week. McCain vs. Obama. It was very interesting though. My oldest, who is hte one really into politics (and got elected despite her anti-campaign lol) came home and told me, Obama won school wide at about 65%%. The school is about 70% AA so this didn't really surprise me. What surprised me was is in her gifted English class which is 70% white, Obama won by about 60%. Things ARE changing. It make take an election or two to change it, but we will see the change.

I took the time to read every word, and it was worth it. Thank you for taking the time to write this.

Poor people have been deluded into thinking they are middle class. That's why they continually vote against their best interests.

When I used to teach in college (blue-collar state school), students would talk about the possibility they could be wealthy. I would challenge them -- ask them how much money they would have to make a year to be wealthy. Invariably, they would answer $150,000 to $200,000 a year.

I had the sad duty to inform them that in the US, the wealthy make almost that much in a day. And, the wealthy can spend that much on a weekend of golf.

I SO get you. My husband was a disabled in the line of duty sheriff duty who went on 66 percent pay at the old age of 30. He was hit on Christmas day and fired a year later on Christmas Eve. It wasn't personal they said, it's just the way they transfer the payroll from one agency to another. We are actually lucky he had Civil Service or it would have even been worst. The idiot who struck him down in his car, and another lady who was in the parking lot, got out after only 7 years and lives completely healthy in Penn. We were warned by our state DA's office to move because he made threats against the hubby and the kids, so we moved.

I've been living this life for awhile now and I might know some things that may assist you. PM me if you want a private chat. You're not alone.

Why does anyone think this okay?? I just don't get it. Ya know what's really crazy? The PD won't let him go back to work yet but the Army will!! And I'm left thinking, you people are just f'ing stupid!

I may pm you later. Between the shooting and all the crap in the aftermath of the shooting, I'm not sure anymore if I know what I'm doing.

For her parents and family, of course... one very small blessing is that she's young enough that she won't be as scared as they are. I am truly so sorry. :hug:

You must be so proud of your heroic husband. What an amazing guy. :patriot:

Thank you for sharing your story. I wish all of you the very, very, very best.

completely horrifying. I love my husband, but he made his choices, ya know? My niece, she didn't have this choice. This is something middle America should be reminded of. You don't always get to pick. Sometimes it just happens to you.

Thank you for your kind thoughts. We believe, as a family, that it makes a difference. :grouphug: