Pittsburgh Gym Killer's Dating Coach - You must be a Man of Steel Balls

-----

Through his books, online columns and instructional workshops held in Los Angeles, Steele teaches middle-aged men how to appeal to younger women and enjoy dating and personal success. One of Steele's promotional video clips posted online showed Sodini meeting women at a dating workshop in California.

-----

Steele offers blunt instructions to would-be Romeos:

"The all time DATE DESTROYER is being a NICE GUY. You must be a Man of Steel Balls," Steele insists.

"Women who show signs of interest are the only ones to focus on."

"I can guarantee you that unless you're as suave as Cary Grant, as handsome as Tom Selleck, or as manly as Paul Newman, don't attempt humor or a flirty remark."

http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pittsburghtrib/news/pittsburgh/s_637150.html

IMHO the killer obsessed with dating younger women instead of sticking to women his own age where he may have been more successful in dating. Course the whack job could have ended up murdering any woman unlucky enough to date him. He certainly was mentally ill.

what if I'm with an intelligent woman?"

:rofl:

that some lack self-actualization and life experience (which can certainly hone bullshit detection skills). I realize there are many, many younger women who are both self-actualized and wise beyond their years, but I don't believe these were the younger women Sodini actively sought.

I'm not exactly the poster boy for romantic success, but seriously, I do at least know that people respond to humor. Example: I am 22 and I was waiting for the subway the other day sitting next to a *very* attractive young woman about my age. She wasn't "my type", but objectively she was very pretty. I don't flirt in public, but the situation was just too perfect. There was a much older man, who looked like a total sleezebag, ogling her and making everything uncomfortable.

After a couple minutes of this action, Mr. Sleezy comes up to this girl, and despite wearing a huge and highly visible watch on his wrist, asked her what time it was. After that exchange, he drifted back off. I waited for him to get a ways away and I leaned in on the lady in question and said "I guess that huge watch of his doesn't work in these situations". She laughed and had a big look of relief on her face that I had sort of broken the tension. You don't need to be Mr. Smooth to get a response from people.

Any "dating coach" who tells people not to try and have a sense of humor is just ripping people off. I'm no expert, but man, I'm neither suave, handsome, or a mountain man: if it weren't for humor, what would there be? Acting like a prick? Apparently...

A good sense of humor makes a man appear to me tons more suave and handsome that he may consider himself to be. :)

Interestingly, it was the same week I was asked to leave the "Dancing With the Stars" auditions because they said I was too sexy.

:rofl:

I'm old enough to be your mother, but if either of my lovely young goddaughters told me about a guy like you, I'd tell 'em, "He's, at the very least, friends-for-life material." In our family, that's a much higher compliment than "boyfriend material."

:yourock:

:blush:

to the classic "authoritarian personality" type - i.e., the kind that John Dean talked about with regards to today's Neo-conservatives. The ones looking for a "big daddy" figure that they can look up to and view as a kind of father figure and ultimate protector.

He got into one of his "ultimate shopping experiences", in which the advice-seeking desperate dater can go on a group shopping experience led by Captain Steel Balls. Well, CSB has some pretty strict guidelines about the trip - give me your credit card info & make sure you let your bank know beforehand, so they don't think someone's trying to rip you off, don't ask questions, don't be difficult, yada, yada, yada. Sounds like a real peach!

http://www.steelballs.com/how_to_dress.html

Going shopping for clothes where questions are strictly forbidden? Don't these people have any friends they can ask?

A friend of a friend. He's short, balding, wingnut, Sarah Palin fan, brags about his prowess with younger women, has been married twice - both to younger women who were introverted. Was a sexual harassment suit waiting to happen at work. In fact, I have a strong suspicion that he was pulled off of his contract at work very quickly because someone was monitoring his e-mail and saw the comments he was making about women. Even went to far as to refer to the underage daughter of one of our friends as "open for business" when she got a tattoo. And he couldn't understand why I would constant lay into him about being a sexist pig. He said that *I* was the one without a sense of humor! I'm sorry, but when you call someone's underage daughter a whore, it's not funny.

I have a strong suspicion that this guy is an acolyte of Mr. Balls-of-Steele.

he still makes me laugh and i let him know how much i value that

And the laughs are worth all the rest of the petty day-to-day bs.


"He makes me laugh." -Jessica Rabbit

She was laughing AT you, not with you.

Be glad of it.

to be his daughter must have large wallet.

I am far from well-to-do, but the last relationship I had was with a woman quite a few years younger than I. She liked me for things other than money.

Other things being large help, not just a wallet.

















Like a owning a nice large home, you sickos.

vocabulary.

delivered for me by UPS to her house, and could I please come over and get it.

n/t

fucked up dating advice. Being genuine has always worked for me. Being a nice guy (which is me) has always worked for me. Demonstrating to a woman that you just met and hope to date that you have "steel balls" is counterproductive in every way and only a douchebag would count on that approach leading to success. Hating women in the first place and then demonstrating "steel balls" is like kicking a kitten to show your love. Doesn't work. Fail. Kitten runs away and never comes back, and for good reason, too, because an asshole like that is dangerous.

Why can't I meet more men like you? A lot of women hate bullshit and are pretty good at spotting it. We are just looking for men to be who they are - we don't want them to act like this or that, just be genuine. We know that nobody is perfect and that frees us up to be who we are.

Besides, men who are authentic are usually happier with themselves and more accepting of other people and the world around them. In general, the kind of men real women like to date.

Maybe there is a *little* more you look for in a man?

Thank you!

Too many guys don't believe this, but it's true. The women who are emotionally ready for a real relationship respond to nice guys.

not cause it was so grand. and she used and abused and then walked.

oh the joys of being old dating a kid

And couldn't date an 18 year old. I don't want to offend the youngsters, but mentally and emotionally, I don't think there is much difference between a 15 year old girl and an 18 year old.

girl much better than a woman that will say... no way

The really handsome guys are the ones who don't need a sense of humor. Us average folks need to bring our A game if we want to attract high status women.

Humor does go a long way in my opinion. I have a friend who is a stand up comic. The guy is 5 7, 140 lbs, 35, graying hair, and acne on his neck. Not the most appealing physical specimen. However, whenever we go out, that guy has a slew of women around him. He is just so damn funny and entertaining. The only guy I know who did better with women than him was this 6 3 all American dude that we hung with. That guy had no personality what so ever. That really didn't matter because he had model like looks and women would literally throw themselves at him. I have actually seen my short friend try to pull women from the our stud friend. The short guy would put up a valiant effort, but the stud would always win out.

The second point about only hitting on women who seem interested in you is spot on the #1 best advice. If a woman (or man) is not interested in you right off, then it is almost certain you are not going to change his/her mind. You might change the mind of someone who *is* initially interested in you (I'm an expert at that!). But never the other way around.

And like everybody else posting here, the "no humor" advice sounds insanely stupid. Of course, humor does require smarts. So I guess if you're as stupid as this author appears to be, then, yes, don't try humor. You'll just sound like an idiot.

The problem with dating "gurus" like the idiot Steele and others is that they take the complexities of human interaction and turn them into simplistic and potentially damaging material aimed at the most confused and insecure individuals in the male gender. No doubt it brings in the suckers as there are big profits to be had, but they never give men any REAL information with which to make their lives better. The reason, that is not their goal. Making money is their goal. There are people who do offer fairly sound advice regarding relationships who also make a good amount of money, but these guys like Steele and Dr. Love, and the guy from the radio whose name escapes me, they dehumanize women and set them up as objects of conquest. They use language like. "Women don't know what they want" which is completely insulting. They prescribe a "Take charge" mentality without the necessary distinction between someone who is truly confident in their worth and someone who is just acting like an asshole.

They demonize the "nice guy" constantly without making the important distinction between men who are genuinely respectful of women and men who are insecure due to whatever experiences they need to work through, and who let people (not just women) walk all over them.

In short people who promote "Steel Balls" or being the "Bad Boy" or playing him, are nothing but predators on men's insecurities. They are scum that are no better than the Snake Oil sellers of old who promised vim and vigor with their shitty concoctions.

"IMHO the killer obsessed with dating younger women instead of sticking to women his own age where he may have been more successful in dating. Course the whack job could have ended up murdering any woman unlucky enough to date him. He certainly was mentally ill."

IMHO the killer was not successful in dating or having healthy relationships because he had psychological problems. He was insecure due to the neglect he claims he suffered from his parents and the bullying from his brother. He tried to get over the trauma by being "successful" in business and could not understand why he wasn't popular with the ladies. He would not have been successful with women his own age either because he had to many personal obstacles to have a healthy relationship. His rantings are an example of what twisted thought processes are formed when you don't reality test with friends, family, or professional counseling.