I wonder if there is something wrong with me?

Sometimes I wonder if there is something wrong with me. Sometimes I get extremely weird reactions from people that make me feel that there is.

For example, earlier this year when I was still a manager at Target. My next level manager (who was in charge of human resources) called me in to her office. She asked me why I did not write up a team member who told us she needed to leave work early and did so.

I told her that since she was in the late stages of pregnancy, and was having an unexpected pregnancy complication at work, I felt that it would not be the right thing to do. I just remember her looking at me like there was something wrong with me before she proceeded to tell me that "it doesn't matter if you think it's right this is a business and she disrupted the business by leaving early". I ended up not doing it and getting written up by our store manage for insubordination. I was told by all my peers that it seemed kind of questionable to them, but I "should have just done it because upper management said so" pretty much.

What made me feel I was weird though is that I thought my point would be understood. But it is like my way of thinking and coming up with a course of action is substantially different than everyone else.

Things like that happen all the time with people I interact with. It is like I say something and I am on the completely different page as everyone else.

I am wondering does this happen to anyone else here in daily life? Could it be maybe because I am in Texas and the people just think differently? Or is it I am just weird compared to most people?

Just like everyone else.

You did the right thing, the humane thing. That clashed with the corporate thing, naturally.

Republicans claim to be family values, yet they overtly team up with those who are the least family-friendly. I think people finally noted that by 2008...

Not only morally, but legally.

...but it's certainly not "wrong".

It's called compassion. I say you did good.

You're just looking to see if people agree with you on how you handled that situation.

As much as I loathe organizations, I think you're bound to play by their rules if you're going to take their money. If the rules said someone leaving early was to be written up, it was your responsibility to do that. I understand your compassion about her pregnancy, and potential complications, but that's not the corporation's responsibility. She left early, and if the protocol is that you are to write up anyone who leaves early - the reason doesn't matter - then that's what you do.

What's ironic, of course, is if that pregnant woman had applied, let's say, for disability because of the pregnancy, there would be no record of her having to leave work early that day, and your "good deed" would work greatly against her.

See how that works? Life is a two-edged sword..............................................

The Corporate Machine does not allow for human feelings or actions.

It's run by sociopaths, generally. I had read someplace that, in the real world, the very best upper level managers ARE a bit socio/psychopathic. They climb to the top on the backs of the people they screw over and stomp on.

I'm astonished at the short-sightedness and self-congratulatory responses in this thread. As if the OP had done something valiant by not doing his job.

He took the job. He knew what his responsibilities were when he took the job. If there were some facets of the role that he didn't like, he should have told the person who hired him. For him to decide to violate a tenet of his job because of some idea of compassion on his part was just ridiculous.

And your comments about "the Corporate Machine" are trite and mindless.

Generalizations are idiotic, no matter who's mouthing them.....................................

you will have regrets. That's much harder to live with than following your own moral standards. You did the right thing and are not a bureaucrat who "follows orders".

Yes, it will bring you derision and sometimes even censure from others, but there are some of us who feel we are betraying something deep in our humanity if we don't follow our own council.

awhile to get a heart transplant in that empty space in her chest. There's nothing wrong with you. :hug:

I'm sure the only business disrupted was that people had to wait a little extra time in line to buy their foreign manufactured trash.

Sounds like you did the right thing.

Corporate drones are paid to be automatons. Having a heart is a liability in Corporate America.

Yes. You are different, but there's nothing "wrong" with you. In fact, I would argue, there is something distinctly "right" about you, but that makes you (and me too) a poor fit for Corporate America.

:dem:

-Laelth

I'm sure it felt bad when your boss and even co-workers were critical, but you behaved reasonably and responsibly, and were compassionate toward the woman and her about-to-be born child. What the hell did they expect you to do---make the woman have a miscarriage by working through her shift when she needed medical attention?

But your attitude towards insecure tight ass managers and sheeplike co-workers is not wrong.

I was a department head in local government for over 25 years. I was always getting a ration of crap from my boss for not disciplining my staff members for stupid stuff (one guy farted in the break room while a city councilor was present).

Once I caught an employee stealing and fired him on the spot. Do you think they backed me up? Ha! THey let him off with a three month suspension because he threatened to sue.

Generally speaking, the further up the food chain you get the more your spine resembles a slinky.

I almost always feel like an alien among everyone. There are very few people I can connect with on that level of thinking. You were right. We cannot live and thrive doing things according to business practices.
A place I worked for a year ago, it seemed everyone lost a parent in a short time frame. I was one of the first, I reached out to all that had it happening to them. I literally stopped what I was doing to let that stranger (yes, I didn't know them except a hello in the morning) that they could talk to me and they did. The other assholes I worked with complained that I was taking time out of our work, and you shouldn't bring your issues there. Fuck them. I never knew how big the hole is when a parent passes. I will never change even if it is to my detriment, I would rather be known for who I was rather than my success in the working world. It is a choice to make, choose wisely we all have to face the mirror everyday.

and if the subject ever comes up again, mention how if you hadn't done it and something awry had occurred with the woman's pregnancy because of it, that company would be looking at a very, very expensive lawsuit.

That should get Ms. Kiss-up-kick-down to sheathe her claws.

Some people are so concerned with the climb to the top they lose all human perspective and turn into near psychopaths.

No doubt there are a larger percentage of ass-holes like that in the South/West. I worked for a person like that when I was doing retail to make money while in college. He fired me. I and a few coworkers smashed his car with boulders that we threw from a nearby cliff to the place where he parked his car at work. Not one of us felt an ounce of regret after that and to this day I brag about my bad behavior. Discompassionate ass-holes are not "normal" - fuck 'em.

Advertized. My sister worked there as a checker. An item wrung up wrong. The customer stated the policy, and my sister agreed, and gave the item. Then, told her manager about it. To be honest. She was written up. Never give the customer the item, just becasue it is policy. The manager is supposed to enter the situation, and make the lowlife, wanting a freebee, to feel like pond scum. This, was policy. The commercials sure make them seem noce though, and oh, they always ask if I need help out, with my one pack of gum.

you have the ability to think for yourself, act compassionately and do what is right. Those attributes are not popular these days. If everything was RIGHT with you, you'd be one of them.

I just could not bring myself to do some of the unethical things I was being asked to do to other people. The term "it's only business" is abhorrent to me when referring to decisions that change peoples life's. I will gladly earn less in a subordinate position rather than become inhuman...

I talk to people and they look at me like I'm speaking a foreign language.

I do something and it's always "wrong".

I make a remark (IRL) and someone has to get all snarky and snotty even though I'm not talking to them, like they have the right to intrude on my conversation with someone else.

One particularly aggravating work related deal (there were lots of them, but I'm remembering this one right now) was when I worked at a clothing manufacturing place, in the office...another girl and I were supposed to enter some data on the computers, which were unavailable at the time because there weren't enough to go around so we had to wait till they were free. I figure I'll finish up on some other stuff I had to do while we're waiting...the girl I'm supposed to go in there with gives me hell for some reason or another...I guess because I wasn't sitting there chatting with my thumb up my ass like she was. I was making use of my time...and she thinks I'm completely blowing off the computer deal by doing something else even though we can't get in the computer room for another 20 minutes, at least.

Usually I don't say shit back to people, but this really pissed me off...I told her that I was merely USING MY TIME TO BEST ADVANTAGE until the computers became free.

damn.

so this is the type of shit that happens to me. It makes me wonder if there's something wrong with ME, or are other people just flaming assholes in search of somebody they think they can jump all over...

so...you're not alone.

:)

You did the right thing.

you should have told your manager that because the woman was in late stages pregnancy, you wanted to make sure the store would not be subject to any possible lawsuit from forcing her to stay later -- harm to the baby could have resulted in a lawsuit/damages of six or seven figures! -- you could even say that it might be a good idea to see what loss prevention/insurer says for next time

protecting the business from lawsuits is language they understand

instead of being written up yourself, you might have made this other manager aware of a pre-existing policy or caused the manager to put the old policy more in line with something that wouldn't expose them to potential lawsuits -- hence more workers, more often, might have benefited, instead of just this woman just this one time

It's as if thought is somehow painful to them and they just can't understand why anybody would do it without strong incentive.

Blind obedience and meanness of spirit are now the American way.

I am lucky to work at a place of employment where mangement has empathy for their workers.

And many people DO just think differently!

Trust me, I get the same thing too. People look at me in horror when I say things where I try to be compassionate. It is very strange indeed.

not empathize with employees.

A few months ago I was 1 minute late to my call center job because my car was in the shop and I had to take the earliest possible bus. I got off the bus and RAN to the building and to my desk to sign in but I was not there to take calls at 7am. I was there at 7:01am. No calls came through the first 10 minutes anyway.

I explained this to my supervisor and she didn't say a word. The next day I got "the speech" which she was required to give me by management. Its was a 'warning'.

The workers life just doesn't matter at all. So by showing empathy you are doing something very different.

:(

"wrong" is a relative term here.

was a dormitory officer (in a prison) in an open bay dorm with 74 beds. An inmate had just returned from the medical department with an ankle injury when it was time for count, where all inmates were to be sitting on their bunks quietly.

The man was assigned to a top bunk, so I told him just to sit in the day room until I could get him a change to a lower bunk. The sgt in charge of my dorm came in, asked why the man was in the day room. I gave the explanation, and added that I had called medical already and was told to tell the man to "hop his ass onto the top bunk" so he was where he was until I could get it fixed.

The sgt said to tell him to hop his ass up there just like the nurse had told me.

I told the sgt I would not do that, but if he insisted, to go ahead and tell him himself, bearing in mind that he was wearing an ace bandage, had not been exrayed, and that if he fell there were 73 potential lawsuit witnesses listening to the 'hop his ass onto the top bunk' conversation.

The last word was "Leave him where he is, we'll get him a bottom bunk."