Obama's 1st Year - Hope than Cynicism

I'm not young. I've been around. I have voted Democrat since I first could - for Carter.

I've always been involved, well-read, informed and caring about the major (and even minor) issues. I made a personal effort to understand and not just be a mindless vote. I understood what was happening during Reagan and I cried unrestrainedly when Bill and Al and Tipper and Hillary stood in front of the Arkansas Statehouse while "Don't Stop Thinking About Tomorrow" played.

Ok, that didn't end too well. But I stood whole heartedly behind Al Gore. Same for John Kerry. No disappointments with Al Gore whatsoever. I thought John Kerry let me down with the Ohio vote count. I am positive he could have stood stronger, and I personally always thought his personal vanity wasn't strong enough to weather the "poor loser" sobriquets of the Right Wing, even though Al Gore set a fine precedent.

In 2008 I started at the left. I supported Kucinich, than Edwards (my apologies) than Obama. I REJECTED Hillary as a DLC corporatist . (Sorry Hillary)

So I turned to Barack Obama. I listened. I believed. I bought in. More than anyone since Bill Clinton's first term. I want to tell you that I BELIEVED. Every word he said. He was different. He was real. He had a unique personal story that was emblematic of who and what we are today. He didn't patronize me or anyone else in his presentations. He had plans, Detailed plans.

One year later I can say that no one has promised more and delivered less in my lifetime as a Democrat. And when I say say promised, I am not speaking of results, I am speaking of commitment to principles espoused in the campaign. There's a whole laundry list of astonishing turn arounds. I have to ask myself, who was the greater fool? - Me for believing what he said or him for saying them in the first place?

I think the greatest damage is what I alluded to in the title of this OP. President Obama managed to tap into long dormant veins of optimism and belief. I speak for myself, but living through Reagan, Bush, and Bush will make a person skeptical. Obama pierced the alligator hide and made me believe again - in the process, in others, and in myself (I'm NOT an idiot for believing in change!)

And then he upended all that he campaigned on and became the anti-Obama, not with his words, but his ACTIONS. And I became chagrinned and embarassed. Shit! I believed all that stuff! It will be a long cold day in hell before I invest my emotions and committed belief again.

And that is the legacy of year 1. Hope evaporated becomes cynicism.

Cynicism insulates one's heart from crushing despair.

But I had an inkling of what Obama was about when I looked up his top donors. Still, I gave him a chance in good faith.

Times like this I yearn for Bill Clinton, at least he made an effort not to lie outright, and parsing his every word was almost fun.

And that is not what I had expected in the excitement of Obama's election.

It still isn't a done deal for me....I am between cynicism, but heading toward disgust.

Those that have his ear and those that cheer his every move have done this President a great disservice.

Phoebe Loosinhouse, you echo the sentiment of millions of Democrats tonight. K&R.

and have moved forward to putting the blame where it belongs --- on Barack Obama.

Only he is responsible for his words during the campaign and his actions that followed after election.

His words followed by his actions.

I sure don't consider myself old.

Wasn't it John Belushi's character in Animal House who explained it thusly: "You fucked up. You trusted us."

We gave them the keys to the car and went along on this road trip.

Clinton had a bad first year, too, but he never seemed this lost.

he's surprised me at just how blatantly he's squandered his popularity.

The first time I saw him was that 2004 convention, and when every big media talking head pronounced him 'the Democratic Party's new star', I assumed he must be a corporate shill. Those are the only Democrats they gush over. When he won the election and immediately surrounded himself with Goldman Sachs flunkies and DLC stooges, I pretty much ditched any remaining Hope© I'd picked up along the trail.

Anyway, I've had low expectations since then. But he honestly surprised me with just how far to the right he went, and how poorly the theater was disguised. I mean, all this bullshit about "60 votes" and using Blue Dogs and Republicans to smash liberal proposals and advance corporate ones... I don't think I've ever seen the veneer done so unconvincingly.